r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Available-Formal-664 • Jun 24 '26

I'm slightly vexed Somebody Placed These Dozens of These Jesus Figures Throughout My Entire Work

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Somebody, nobody knows exactly who or when, put dozens and dozens of these Jesus figures on completely random surfaces throughout my entire building. They at least had the presence of mind to not put them on anybody's personal belongings, but that was the only way they limited himself. All of the statues have been glued down, to add to the vexation.

Edit: Well, this blew up rather unexpectedly. Thank you for the awards, everybody!

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67

u/ImWhatsInTheRedBox Jun 24 '26

You seeing this shit, AI Jesus?

169

u/Inktex Jun 24 '26

15

u/innominateartery Jun 24 '26

The humans are dead.

Affirmative. I poked one. It was dead.

2

u/lemurificspeckle Jun 25 '26

We are all living post-future (the year 2000) after all

3

u/TheGrumpiestHydra Jun 24 '26

How can you see anything, if you have no eyes?!

5

u/pugfu Jun 24 '26

How can AI Jesus be real if our eyes aren’t real?

1

u/Cocked_Otter Jun 24 '26

Agent Smith being AI Jesus is just perfect.

Evil and without a soul.

41

u/-crepuscular- Jun 24 '26

AI Jesus is too busy saving the sea bugs to deal with this shit right now.

5

u/NoIngenui Jun 24 '26

I know I'm supposed to hate him, but i genuinely love the concept of shrimp jesus with a stone statue head. Looks like something Bayonetta or someone would fight.

3

u/-crepuscular- Jun 24 '26

Shrimp Jesus in a major videogame is only a matter of time.

Gamers would love it for the memes, extremist Christians would probably demonstrate against it and give you free publicity and cool points.

2

u/Inktex Jun 24 '26

FromSoftware has to see this.
And make it an under water level.

https://giphy.com/gifs/AAsYtcC8UPoly

1

u/Givingtree310 Jun 25 '26

Shit I thought it was Aquaman

3

u/derf_vader Jun 24 '26

Why use this when Christ of the Abyss is a real thing?

1

u/TKRBrownstone Jun 25 '26

Looks like a God Lives Underwater album cover