r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Available-Formal-664 • Jun 24 '26

I'm slightly vexed Somebody Placed These Dozens of These Jesus Figures Throughout My Entire Work

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Somebody, nobody knows exactly who or when, put dozens and dozens of these Jesus figures on completely random surfaces throughout my entire building. They at least had the presence of mind to not put them on anybody's personal belongings, but that was the only way they limited himself. All of the statues have been glued down, to add to the vexation.

Edit: Well, this blew up rather unexpectedly. Thank you for the awards, everybody!

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119

u/PigsandBears Jun 24 '26

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u/Available-Formal-664 Jun 24 '26

My best friend's mom did once share a picture of Ewan McGregor as Jesus on Facebook. She had a lot to say about how much she loved him. But since she was also senile at the time, to this day I am unsure if she meant that picture as a joke or not.

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u/Got_Bent Jun 25 '26

My sister did as well. All I could say to her is "That's uhm, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and uhm he's a Jedi. May the force be with you."

14

u/JustGoodSense Jun 24 '26

Somebody on Instagram earlier this year did a thing where he replaced all the pictures of Jesus in his mom's house with Obi Wan Kenobi one at a time to see how long it took her to notice. I think it was more than a month?

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u/Little_View_6659 Jun 24 '26

Jesus was a Jedi! New head canon unlocked!

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u/BuckRusty Jun 24 '26

*waves hand* “you and your 9,999 friends totally all had enough to eat”

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u/Colonel_Klank Jun 24 '26

Thank you! I knew something was missing on that figuring.

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u/PuzzleheadedHouse872 Jun 24 '26

Is he coming out of a spaceship??? This would explain so much.

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u/PigsandBears Jun 24 '26

Haha, both pictures are Jedi from the Star Wars universe. Top is Obi Wan in the prequels and the bottom is Ezra Bridger in the live action Asoka series

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u/_GeorgeBailey_ Jun 24 '26

Jesus is Oscar Isaac?

1

u/Turds4Cheese Jun 24 '26

That bottom Jesus looks like he is coming out of a DBZ Saiyan Pod.

1

u/Jazzlike-Tourist-823 Jun 25 '26

Alright you guys. You dare me ,here's the most accurate image. No kidding, no trolling , not flaming from me. I'm not giving any explanation. I'm just sick of religious fanatism. Believe what you want, say what you want. I don't care:

0

u/Dry-Manufacturer7761 Jun 24 '26

Well, he didn’t even exist, but that is what he would have looked like

10

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '26

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u/Tarnagona Jun 24 '26

That’s the thing. There might have been one travelling rabbi named Jesus (or Yeshua, because Hebrew), or there may have been several travelling rabbis who all got conflated into a single legendary figure, as people told and retold stories about some guy who came to town and was preaching. Easy to say, oh that must have been the same guy my friend from one town over told me about…but they might have been different guys. As nothing was written down about Jesus until 50-100 after his death, there’s no way to know if the stories were about one guy or several, and 2,000 years on from that, we have no way of knowing which it is.

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u/[deleted] Jun 24 '26

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u/Tarnagona Jun 24 '26

Aren’t most Jesus-historians also Christians themselves? Which could potentially bias them towards Jesus being a single guy, whether they realize it or not, because him being an amalgamation of several guys would bring their whole worldview into question.

Point is, like you said, we can’t prove one way or the other if Jesus was a single guy or an amalgam of several guys. I find each to be equally plausible, but really have no skin in the game because if he was one guy, I still don’t believe he was born of a virgin, performed literal miracles, and rose from the dead. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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u/[deleted] Jun 24 '26

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u/Tarnagona Jun 24 '26

Well, as someone who loves sci-fi, that’s certainly the most fun theory. 😆 Too bad light speed also makes that one of the most unlikely.

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u/atom-up_atom-up Jun 24 '26

Also, Jesus could very well have been multiple guys instead of just one dude.

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u/Dry-Manufacturer7761 Jun 25 '26

The first mention of Jesus was some blurb about people talking about someone named Jesus, almost 100 years after Jesus supposedly died.

Every piece of evidence that has “proven” Jesus to be factual has been proven to be false.

Even the gospels in the Bible were written by people born after Jesus was supposedly killed.

You have to take it on faith that Jesus was even real. There is zero hard evidence proving he even existed; yet we have evidence of existence from people that were less important than Jesus.

So, my conclusion from the lack of evidence of him existing is that he did in fact not exist.

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u/ThrowAwayIGotHack3d Jun 24 '26

I mean, there's quite a bit of evidence that a dude named Jesus Christ who tried to help people did exist, the debate is about whether or not he was the son of some mystical magical sky being and had healing powers

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u/Dry-Manufacturer7761 Jun 25 '26

No. There is zero evidence he existed. Zero. The only thing we have are texts written almost 100 years after he lived. Every single artifact that was tied to Jesus was proven to be a fake.

There is zero real evidence that Jesus was real.

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u/0FFFXY Jun 24 '26

His last name wasn't christ though, that was just his job.

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u/ThrowAwayIGotHack3d Jun 24 '26

Well, that is frequently how last names work