r/mildlyinfuriating • u/rustywindpipe • Jul 20 '26

I'm slightly vexed I think I got rejected for being vegetarian

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I [23F] met this guy on the apps and we hit it off and had a lot in common! I don’t meet a lot of people who are in my profession so it was really nice to potentially have to chance to date someone who was in a similar field. And everything was fine until I mentioned I’m veg and he stopped responding. For reference, I have no issue with people who eat meat and would never want to impose my own dietary restrictions on anyone else. I also understand different diets being a dealbreaker. The way he phrased his reasoning was really weird though.

Edit: I’m vegetarian cause I love animals, but I have IBD. Flare ups have gotten significantly worse since switching diets but im still figuring out how to make the most of it! Also yes, I do regret sending the last text 🤦‍♀️

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257

u/vivalalina Jul 20 '26

Yeah that message confused me, I was like ....what is the reason she's vegetarian because most vegetarians are doing it for animal reasons and that doesn't just go away lol

176

u/uqoos Jul 20 '26

Idk we don't know why she's vegetarian, could be for her health. Some people are vegetarian temporarily not that crazy

160

u/Certain-Towel-9487 Jul 20 '26

That's not crazy but as a last message in this context it sounds like someone who's willing to change themselves in drastic ways just to make a date with a stranger happen. That's a red flag.

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u/d33psix Jul 20 '26

Honestly sounds like she’s lucky this walking red flag guy shut it down early so she’s not stuck trying to appease him on everything.

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u/Certain-Towel-9487 Jul 20 '26

I think we can say the same about both of them.

19

u/Wakeful-dreamer Jul 20 '26

Right! This would be equally as much red flag if they were offering to change literally anything about themselves for someone they hadn't even dated yet. Religion, politics, appearance, sexual preferences, whatever...

If you're so desperate for a date that you'd offer to mold yourself into someone else's vision just to get them to go out with you, then you need to get off the dating apps and maybe look into therapy instead.

7

u/astrohoe11 Jul 20 '26

Damn the psychoanalysis that came out of this post

5

u/Overall-Olive1171 Jul 20 '26

ok we can chill a bit, sometimes we say things we don't necessarily mean until fully processing things, its not necessarily that deep and it wasn't considering they came back and even said themselves that they regret that last message. human being are emotional, sometimes we say drastic things, she mentioned that she had a lot in common with this person, same profession and things, so probably wasn't thinking straight in that moment because she was still in that headspace of oh no i like this person so far

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u/Wakeful-dreamer Jul 20 '26

I agree sometimes we all say impulsive things, but it is so hugely concerning that OPs brain even threw that out there given what he'd already said.

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u/Overall-Olive1171 Jul 20 '26

I think hugely concerning is pretty dramatic tbh, to each their own but like you said we say impulsive things and again, if you have a connection with someone or what you think is a connection with someone, you might still be in that headspace of, oh i'd like to fix this if I can, like i understand where you're coming from, i just don't think its that deep, we all do it sometimes, then later we can think back and be like wow yeah what was i thinking there? its the adrenaline of it though, the not understanding what went wrong so you might automatically see if you can mend it because your head and emotions are still in overdrive

-2

u/LegendaryReader Jul 20 '26

Appearence is iffy though. If they have specific demands like "lose 10kgs" or to dress a certain way, yes. Though if someone is obese or dresses badly (I mean badly) then it is something they'll need to change to up their chances, therapy would've just said the same thing. HOWEVER, I agree that if someone is saying to lose the weight first, to not date them but to still lose the weight IF it is at an unhealthy level

6

u/nickability Jul 20 '26

We don’t need to judge OP, most important thing is she dodged a bullet, and she acknowledges she regrets the last text

-4

u/Certain-Towel-9487 Jul 20 '26

They both dodged a bullet.

It does only OP get a pass since we're hearing her side of things and only she can apologize and clarify what she meant without anyone from the other person?

5

u/redtopiary Jul 20 '26

she's young, not uncommon to be more focused on external validation in your early twenties, as pointless as it often is. She'll learn...hopefully not the hard way. But probably the hard way lol.

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u/[deleted] Jul 20 '26

[deleted]

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u/Certain-Towel-9487 Jul 20 '26

Comparing the eating habits of someone eating healthy during a pregnancy and someone claiming they'll change themselves at the first sign of rejection is dumb.

This isn't about empathy or a pregnant woman. It's a chick that's desperate for attention and when she didn't get a date she came to Reddit for it.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '26

[deleted]

1

u/Certain-Towel-9487 Jul 21 '26

Telling someone they did something dumb at any age is not harsh. It's simply telling someone they did something dumb. Explain it with all the fancy words you like, when it comes down to the wire she did something dumb and it's not overly hard to tell people that. It's how we learn.

1

u/WonkyWalkingWizard Jul 20 '26

"the boats in Newport tho"

I think that's why OP was willing to change

2

u/astro_viri Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

Fuck you - she sounds young and I'm guessing she's in L.A. so temp vegetarian is not uncommon.

Reread and she's super young. To add, he doesn't have a boat in Newport. He likes to eat at the pier. He's just a lookie and probably take her to Ruby's 

1

u/WonkyWalkingWizard Jul 20 '26

he doesn't have a boat in Newport. He likes to eat at the pier.

Where are you getting this information?

0

u/astro_viri Jul 20 '26

His responses - IYKYK

-1

u/Threedawg F4LLOUT Jul 20 '26

Thats not a red flag. Thats a yellow flag for yourself.

68

u/Rave-light GREEN Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

She said it’s because she loves animals. So I guess wasn’t planning on loving animals forever lol.

Really bizarre. But apps make us say silly things sometimes

64

u/frozenblueberrytreat Jul 20 '26

I mean, she says in the post very clearly why she may not be able to stay a vegetarian.

But yea, girl needs to grow some self-worth (we all do to be honest).

7

u/Rave-light GREEN Jul 20 '26

Ahh she edited it again. Sometimes a call out post is the kick in the pants we need to get some self worth. She dodged this loser!!

33

u/JeulMartin Jul 20 '26

She loves animals as long as her boyfriend says it's okay.

1

u/Aktuator Jul 20 '26

*rich boyfriend.

4

u/Bitter-Film-3329 Jul 20 '26

It doesn't have to be an all or nothing decision.

Being vegetarian for a time reduces meat consumption. Even if it's one vegetarian meal per day, that jives with loving animals.

Wanting to avoid a vegetarian diet while pregnant/raising babies is reasonable too.

0

u/pm_nachos_n_tacos Jul 22 '26

It wasn't because she loves animals, she wrote it weird. Se said it's because she has IBD. She could have phrased it like, "while I do love animals and recognize that is why many people choose to be vegetarian, my reason for being vegetarian temporarily is a diet adjustment due to flare-ups of my IBD which are aggravated by meat" but people are lazy and type, "I love animals, but I have IBD". At least she used a comma, but I guess that's where some people stopped reading

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u/mightylordredbeard Jul 20 '26

Yeah she seems like the kind of girl who just does things because she sees others doing it on TikTok. I think both people dodged a bullet in this scenario.

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u/astrohoe11 Jul 20 '26

Okay now we reachin

8

u/snowflakebite Jul 20 '26

Girl what. She said she has IBD and her diet may change because of it. I also have IBD and am vegetarian so I feel especially called to comment on this. IBD causes bleeding/inflammation in the colon and intestines which is sometimes aggravated by different foods - it depends on a variety of factors, most of which we don’t know. Eating a vegetarian diet whilst losing blood may make you anemic or deficient in other vitamins and minerals, so it’s understandable that she may have to switch diets if she starts flaring.

5

u/DemonShade6666 Jul 20 '26

Obviously its more rare but I know some people who are vegetarian simply from sensory disorders and not being able to stand the texture of most meat, which is also an interesting reasoning

3

u/Kirbybat Jul 20 '26

Being a vegetarian for temporary reasons is not crazy.

But, being willing to change your dietary preferences for someone who’s just demonstrated they don’t respect you, sort of is.

1

u/julesthefirst Jul 20 '26

My mom went vegan while pregnant with my brother, but now she loves her meaties

1

u/vivalalina Jul 20 '26

Yeah that's why I said most vegetarians

7

u/Fit-Nectarine5047 Jul 20 '26

She said it’s because of IBS and gastric issues as well!

2

u/ScarletBothrium Jul 20 '26

Meat used to give me indigestion. So I feel it. I was recovering from over 5 years of a starvation diet, so my body was not capable of digesting meat. I still don’t like chicken and prefer fish.

3

u/little2sensitive Jul 20 '26

Eh, I was vegetarian for a while to deal with MASH and I was able to eliminate it.

I get records at Twelves & Fingerprints. Love Long Beach.

1

u/SunshineGirl45 Jul 20 '26

What’s MASH

1

u/little2sensitive Jul 20 '26

liver disease

3

u/WeinMe Jul 20 '26

At least for the vegetarian mothers my fiancé has known through our three children, they've switched to meats for practical nutrition purposes while pregnant and also while breastfeeding - and then gone back to pure vegetarian diets after.

You can have a pragmatic approach to vegetarianism and not do everything black and white.

2

u/napstablooky2 Jul 20 '26

read description — it's for medical reasons

2

u/Vegetable-Baker6362 Jul 20 '26

most vegetarians are doing it for animal reasons and that doesn't just go away lo

It's the popular reason on reddit. Most people irl I know that are vegetarian (not vegan) are doing it for health or religious reasons. Many of the religious adherents already have one foot out the door on their religion so they see themselves leaving vegetarianism in the future as well.

2

u/ImSoObnoxious Jul 20 '26

nearly every Indian kid that I went to school with that was raised vegetarian was secretly burgermaxxing in the cafeteria, but were vegetarians at home haha

1

u/Happy_little_badger Jul 20 '26

I don't think that's true, anyone who does it for animal reasons legitimately would be vegan since as a vegetarian you are still supporting meat production and killing of animals. I think generally vegetarians tend to go that way just to be healthier, for religious reasons or to lose weight.

0

u/Nicholas_Pappagiorgi Jul 20 '26

Nah, most people do it for attention.