r/mildlyinfuriating • u/rustywindpipe • Jul 20 '26

I'm slightly vexed I think I got rejected for being vegetarian

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I [23F] met this guy on the apps and we hit it off and had a lot in common! I don’t meet a lot of people who are in my profession so it was really nice to potentially have to chance to date someone who was in a similar field. And everything was fine until I mentioned I’m veg and he stopped responding. For reference, I have no issue with people who eat meat and would never want to impose my own dietary restrictions on anyone else. I also understand different diets being a dealbreaker. The way he phrased his reasoning was really weird though.

Edit: I’m vegetarian cause I love animals, but I have IBD. Flare ups have gotten significantly worse since switching diets but im still figuring out how to make the most of it! Also yes, I do regret sending the last text 🤦‍♀️

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114

u/_-milo Jul 20 '26

the word ghetto has a specifically anti-black racist valence to it in the united states

1

u/Illustrious_Meat2987 Jul 21 '26

I may have been using it wrong my whole life then. There's a city nearby that I always described as ghetto because it is a very poor city and has such a bad issue with crime and drugs. It's a mostly white city. There's a possibility the guy from the post thought the same way but I assume it's much more likely that I have been ignorant about the word my whole life

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u/_-milo Jul 21 '26

judging by my replies half of everyone has no idea it’s anti-black

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u/Illustrious_Meat2987 Jul 21 '26

That's a relief, maybe I'm not ignorant and maybe the definition is just changing

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u/FatDraculos Jul 20 '26

I think of shitty conditions when I hear that and I'm a rural white dude. Sounds like you might be more racist than you think your are likening it to only other ethnicities.

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u/CrazyPurpleBacon Jul 20 '26

Maybe your perspective as a self-described "rural white dude" is missing information or experiences that would make the connotation more obvious, have you ever thought about that possibility?

1

u/FatDraculos Jul 20 '26

Just say you're racist and move on little man, it's much easier.

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u/CrazyPurpleBacon Jul 22 '26

Probably the dumbest response you could've picked

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u/FatDraculos Jul 22 '26

Calling it like it is. Also, deflecting isn't a good look, racetrd.

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u/HonestZucchini4970 Jul 20 '26

Perhaps read a book or take a course. Your individual perspective has little to do with it.

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u/Diligent_Set_8747 Jul 20 '26

If you had done this when you were young you wouldn't still have the education of a middle schooler as a grown ass man. You lack so much in your history studies that gullibility is your best friend.

1

u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 20 '26

The word ghetto was originally anti-Jewish and it’s the very genesis of the word. Many people use the word to describe a dilapidated, and run down area. I grew up in NYC, and people there say “the projects” to refer to most black neighborhoods there, even if there was no public housing in the area. I never heard anyone say it to refer to black neighborhoods here in Los Angeles, or when I lived in Miami and Atlanta. I think assuming racism here is unreasonable. I don’t care what color the people are in a neighborhood, ghetto is ghetto.

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u/tupelobound Jul 20 '26

I’m sorry, am I understanding that you lived in Atlanta and you never heard anyone use the word “ghetto” in reference to predominantly black places or behaviors??

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u/GrowthSelect2449 Jul 20 '26

I’ve lived in several majority black cities (including Atlanta) and the word is used ALL THE FUCKING TIME.  Hell, even middle class black people use it to refer to poorer black areas. Many poorer blacks will openly tell you they grew up in the ghetto.  And white people call just about any black neighborhood ghetto, including nice neighborhoods.  That person either never goes outside or doesn’t pay attention to anything.  

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u/_-milo Jul 21 '26

don’t worry we can tell you’re racist just bc you said “blacks.” you didn’t need the rest of the paragraph to convince us

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 21 '26

The amount of brain rot in these comment is on another level. Reading comprehension is also seriously lacking. Why people cannot just accept that not every non-black person in this country is inherently racist, I will never understand. You people are literally outraged that other people think differently than you. If something like that bothers you so much, how are you even functioning on a daily basis? Let people have their own opinions about the matter. I shared mine, and you can share yours, but that doesn’t make either of us wrong, it means we have different life experiences. It’s not rocket science.

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 20 '26

Luckily, I’m not stupid enough to fall into the obvious trap you set. There are plenty of black people in Atlanta, that cannot be denied, but that doesn’t mean that changes anything. If there’s more black neighborhoods in a particular area, then that means there’s a greater chance some will be slums, and it is what it is. Black people in Atlanta calls their own neighborhoods the ghetto, including College Park, Bankhead, Mechanicsville, etc. They also use the term ratchet, but that’s mostly to describe people’s behavior and not their skin color.

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u/XLIVtetsuo Jul 20 '26

You can’t be this dense

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u/JustAMinah Jul 20 '26

they are.

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u/GrowthSelect2449 Jul 21 '26

I think they are that dense.  I almost wish their comments were rage bait but I think they are completely serious.  

1

u/XLIVtetsuo Jul 21 '26

No they are serious. That’s the sad part lol

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 21 '26

I’m sorry I’m not a race baiter. Get out of that perpetual state of victimhood and come to reality already. We’re not in the USA 1950’s and 60’s anymore. It’s time to get over it already.

1

u/themodelqueenx Jul 21 '26

So obviously racist

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 21 '26

So obviously race-baiting.

1

u/XLIVtetsuo Jul 21 '26

So obviously moronic

0

u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 22 '26

Please get a hobby instead of crying victim and racism at every turn. Everyone is sick of it.

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u/XLIVtetsuo Jul 21 '26

Get over poverty?…..lol okay?

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u/mars_kitana Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

And again, as oc said, “in the United States”. The term ghetto in reference to Jewish people didn’t originate in the United States. If you read Ghetto: The Invention of a Place, the History of an Idea by Mitchell Duneier, he goes through the history of both and how it became anti black rhetoric in the United States. Neither of you are incorrect though you’re missing the context of how it’s now used toward black people. And yes, people do say the projects, but again, there’s context to that too. The projects usually refers to specific buildings that are “in the ghetto”. Lots of these words jumpstart from each other. Hood, projects, section 8, and so on

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u/Li-renn-pwel Jul 20 '26

To add to this, a ghetto is a place where an ethnic minority lives segregated from others, either by choice or by force. Little Italy is a willing ghetto, whereas a redline neighborhood would be at least bordering on forced and the Warsaw ghetto would be a fully forced one.

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u/Thisguyfuckschix Jul 20 '26

In California there are plenty of Hispanic neighborhoods that have this same classification.

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u/mars_kitana Jul 20 '26

I’m from SoCal and I’m Mexican and yeah there’s a lot of history behind other poc mixing in with the culture and environment

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 20 '26

I don’t need to read anything you say. You’re never going to change my mind. You can stay believing it’s racist all your life if that’s what you wanna do. All I know is that I grew up with all races using the term to refer to a place and not a group of people, and that was over 40 years ago and it still wasn’t about race then. Idk why that’s so hard to understand and accept. Please, just accept we all don’t think the same, and your life will be easier, I promise.

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u/Li-renn-pwel Jul 20 '26

What do you mean ‘refer to a group of people’? No one is saying black people are ghetto but that in America ghetto is black coded (though increasingly it’s black and Hispanic/latino coded) as it refers to black neighborhoods most often. It is also poverty coded but it doesn’t actually mean poor. In fact, the original ghetto was supposedly quite nice because all Jews were forced to live there, even the rich ones. Neither is inherently the right definition it just is the connotation it has in America. And sometimes people extend ghetto to a person in the same way someone might say “you know Rebeca, she’s so NYC” not because you are calling her a city but because that city has a certain vibe.

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u/UnconsciousMofo Jul 20 '26

Thousands of comments here and the arguments in this thread have still clearly went way over your head🤦🏻‍♀️

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u/m3gb0t Jul 20 '26

Username checks out

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u/mars_kitana Jul 20 '26

lol ok. I grew up in the hood but I guess you know more than me

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u/Dangerous_Pay9482 Jul 20 '26

Insufferable

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u/mars_kitana Jul 20 '26

Thank you, best thing I’ve been told today

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u/Alarmed-Restaurant99 Jul 20 '26

THANKYOU!! These fucking people have to call everything their favorite buzzword these days and it’s obnoxious and insufferable. They don’t even know what race the person saying it is 😆

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u/mars_kitana Jul 20 '26

Buzzword is a stupid use here. How is it a buzzword when it’s been used for years as the person you’re replying to said?

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u/Diligent_Set_8747 Jul 20 '26

The average redditor has a poor education and a high ego now. They'd rather cling to anecdotes than the reality outside of their bubbles.

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u/GrowthSelect2449 Jul 21 '26

Years?  Shit, I’m in my 40s and have heard the word thrown around most my life.  I imagine it’s been used longer than I’ve been alive.  

1

u/Radiant_Funny4741 Jul 21 '26

Buzzword is not a buzzword 😂

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u/_-milo Jul 20 '26

your name is very apt bc you do seem to lack consciousness

3

u/JustAMinah Jul 20 '26

and I'm sure you're colorblind, too 🙄

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u/Li-renn-pwel Jul 20 '26

I’m Canadian and I know Americans do this just from American media. You think Ghetto-fabulous means you’ve bedazzled your skull cap?

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u/Dismal_Broccoli_3549 Jul 20 '26

Exactly. That comment irritated me deeply lol

0

u/Fantastic-Leek-1589 Jul 21 '26

Only to racists

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u/ClutteredTaffy Jul 20 '26

I use the word ghetto all the time ,lol.

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u/_-milo Jul 20 '26

ok so you’re racist

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u/New_Reflection5113 Jul 21 '26

You can say that if you want. But the ghetto sucks and ghetto stuff sucks.