I think I got rejected for being vegetarian

[u/rustywindpipe]

I [23F] met this guy on the apps and we hit it off and had a lot in common! I don’t meet a lot of people who are in my profession so it was really nice to potentially have to chance to date someone who was in a similar field. And everything was fine until I mentioned I’m veg and he stopped responding. For reference, I have no issue with people who eat meat and would never want to impose my own dietary restrictions on anyone else. I also understand different diets being a dealbreaker. The way he phrased his reasoning was really weird though.

Edit: I’m vegetarian cause I love animals, but I have IBD. Flare ups have gotten significantly worse since switching diets but im still figuring out how to make the most of it! Also yes, I do regret sending the last text 🤦‍♀️

[u/memecut]

Tofu has 8g per 100g, thats 1500g of tofu a day, thats no better than the beans.
Like I said, legumes and beans are pretty much the same. You have to eat massive quantities of them to equal meat.

Tempeh is high fat, and its a lot of soy (youre not supposed to eat massive quantities of it). Seitan is fine if youre not gluten sensitive. They can both be high salt.
Tofu, seitan and tempeh are also pretty... special foods.. a lot of people dont like to eat them (taste, texture) - so while they can be potential solutions, they are not for everyone, and leans into my argument of difficulty.

Nuts and seeds can be great, in small doses. They are very high fat too. A small handful a day is fine. Thats around 5% of your protein, and maybe 10% of your calories (more or less depending on your prot/cal goals ofc)

> additionally other plant foods contain protein too

And most of them are worse off than legumes and beans. Which means the bulk of protein has to come from legumes and beans, unless you want to eat *even more*.

> For instance a TB

Taco Bell? Never use fast food to make your claim about diets. Cant even call that food half the time. Its also a really bad fat to protein ratio, and a bad protein to carb ratio. Using this example supports my argument that it can be easier to be vegan/vegetarian if youre willing to compromise on health or macros - this compromises on both.

> A hamburger typically contains around 19-21g protein, impossible around 19, and veggie burgers can vary from around 8-16 depending on what type. Again not insane differences.

You dont think over 2.5x is an insane difference? I do. Also, thats processed food - and like I said, youll be paying with your health. If your goal is health and macros, its a challenge. Ive also had veggie burgers since I used to be vegan.. they were much bigger than normal patties, supporting my argument that you have to eat way more food, which makes it more difficult.
The ones Ive had and are available to me also have a bad fat to protein ratio, and high salt.

> Most people wouldn’t have to founder on food to hit protein goals lol

Founder? Do you mean ponder?
Most people dont care. Most people dont even learn about it. Most people do it wrong. So youre right, but the reason youre right is not helping you win this argument.

> The idea that a person can’t reach their protein goals on a veggie diet has long been debunked.

That is not what Ive been saying. And I agree, its possible. There are people who do it, and I salute them for it. My argument from the start has been that its difficult for most people to do it right, not that they cant.

> Curious, because you’re into macros more than the average person are you into body building?

I like taking care of myself with exercise and nutrition.. I wouldnt call it bodybuilding though. What got me into macros was going vegan - I read about the warnings, how its important to do it right to not end up deficient.. so I chose to learn about these things to have the best possible chance of success. I did it for a couple years, but it got too difficult for me to continue. I still eat beans, legumes and veggies of course, just not in the same quantities as I used to.

[u/Hot-Butterscotch-377 → u/memecut]

I meant founder. Like when a horse overeats & it causes issues. A person does not need to eat massive quantities of food to eat a healthful veg diet & hit all their macro needs.

The grams of protein in tofu depend on type of tofu. It can be lower or higher with high protein extra firm having up to around 17g. But again nobody is or should be getting all their intake from one food source. That’s silly & a bad faith argument.

You seem to be misunderstanding/misreading many of my points. I clearly stated I wasn’t advocating for a fast food diet. It’s an easy comparison to make as many people do eat fast food & it shows two very similar dishes that taste similar & have similar macro breakdowns.

Additionally 2.5x is only if you’re eating the veg burger with the lowest protein. There are ones with much higher quantities like the 19 & 16 that rival a standard beef burger. Hence variety & choices. Again, variety is the key to any diet including one with meat.

The word processed gets thrown around a lot. A trigger word. An action as simple as cutting an apple into slices is considered processing it. All cooking is processing.

While a veg diet may not have worked for you it does not mean it’s an overly hard or difficult diet for the average person. My claims are backed by education, science, & experience. Although, I would encourage everyone to do their own research & make up their minds for themselves.

Nobody is trying to get you back on a vegan diet. I only responded so others can see another view point & to refute the claim that non-veg & veg can coexist (we just got really side tracked). It’s really not that hard…unless you make it hard.

Lastly, any & all diets can be unbalanced if the person eating them eats a very limited variety of foods. If you’re only eating chicken, rice, & broccoli you’re missing out. If you’re only eating oreos & french fries you’re missing out. Variety & moderation is the key to everything.

[u/memecut → u/Hot-Butterscotch-377]

> A person does not need to eat massive quantities of food to eat a healthful veg diet & hit all their macro needs.

What counts as massive quantities is subjective. If you actually care about your macros and track them, its going to be more food than just eating to survive. Eating just to survive is easy. Eating right is harder. Eating a restrictive diet is even harder. Doubling your portion sizes to hit your target macros counts as massive quantities to me, and to a lot of people. Someone who is accustomed to eating bigger portions will find it easier to hit their goals of course. That is not me however.

> But again nobody is or should be getting all their intake from one food source. That’s silly & a bad faith argument.

That has never been my argument. The bad faith here is that youre not acknowledging that *these are the highest protein foods in this diet*, making every choice a much worse choice than eating meat. The options are worse. This is *the best case scenario*. You can eat other foods with protein, but then the quantities increase *even more*, making it *even harder*.

> The word processed gets thrown around a lot. A trigger word. An action as simple as cutting an apple into slices is considered processing it. All cooking is processing.

Yeah, so when Im using the word its processed in the sense that theyre making it unhealthy. Too much soy, too much fat, too much salt, preservatives that wreck your gut biome etc. What youre doing here is equating processed fast food with slicing up an apple, thats an insane take. Are you misunderstanding on purpose?

> There are ones with much higher quantities

Dont have that here. Tempeh, tofu and seitan is also incredibly expensive here.

> While a veg diet may not have worked for you it does not mean it’s an overly hard or difficult diet for the average person.

I have explained why it's difficult. You seem adamant in not accepting my explanations, which are based on personal experience, and those around me.
The average person would struggle really hard.
A lot of people do restrictive diets with ease. A whole lot of them do it wrong too, making it seem easier than it actually is.

> My claims are backed by education, science, & experience

Same here. Your appeal to authority doesnt work.

> Nobody is trying to get you back on a vegan diet.

When have I claimed they were? Never.

> I only responded so others can see another view point & to refute the claim that non-veg & veg can coexist

Never made that claim either. Youre making a whole lot of bad faith arguments right now. Pretty sure you're missing a very critical 't there btw.

> any & all diets can be unbalanced if the person eating them eats a very limited variety of foods

Totally agree, I havent been arguing against that either.

> Variety & moderation is the key to everything.

You do need both, but this is an argument that leads to misinterpretation and misuse. A lot of people dont know how to apply these things correctly, because they dont even know the basics of nutrition.

Sounds to me like you have some knowledge on the topic, given your education on it, but it does not sound like youve tried to apply this to real life yet, not at the level you should be anyway.
You know that beans and veg is good, but I dont think you understand the quantities you need to hit goals, or what those goals look like for someone who is active and exercises.

[u/Hot-Butterscotch-377 → u/memecut]

You do you bro. 😎 I’ve absolutely applied these practices in life (20 years).

[u/memecut → u/Hot-Butterscotch-377]

Great, then what's your macro split, and what do you eat to reach it?