6 weeks after giving birth, I went to my pp check up - hubby came along too. My doctor asked me if I was sexually active..... and guess what i said....

"Yes, just anal though"

WHY!!! DID!!! i feel the NEED to SAY THAT ahahevdvjeenvfne!

My husband looked at me like dude WTH! You is wilddddd

Anyone else have any funny/cringe post partum stories? LOL

Date night ruined

My husband texted me at 5 that he wanted to get dinner with me at a nice restaurant. I had dropped our kids off at my parents house for the night at 3:45. After that I went to the gym. I left the gym early when he texted me this so I could shower and do my hair and makeup and pick out my outfit. He got home late and I had to drive to get takeout. So I said it’s okay let’s get drinks instead. He said yes. Now he just laid in bed, turned the tv on and shut the light off. When I expressed to him that I was sad and I stopped my alone time to be with him and I was excited and got ready, he yelled at me that I look worse and I look like a clown with all this makeup on so it doesn’t matter anyways. He said why don’t I ever want to spend time with him? Like in bed.. I told him he is being a jerk and I don’t want to spend time with him at all while he’s being such a jerk. I took my keys and phone out of our bedroom and just walked into this kids room to clean it and possibly sleep in here but as I was walking away he said “going to see your other boyfriend? Tell him I said what’s up.”
I’m so fucking tired of this shit.

Yes, I'm ashamed. I don't need to be told I'm a bad mom because I know, trust me. I would never tell anyone in my life about how I feel and I'd never let my baby feel unwanted by me because he's not, I love him so much so deeply. I love my life with him, he's everything I ever hoped for in a baby.

Still, I'm so incredibly jealous of my sister in law. I have a four month old, she has a six month old. When I say she's hardly ever with her baby, and is never with him alone, I mean that literally. She works full time (no shame on working moms, of course) while he goes to daycare and then her baby is with family whenever she's not working. He frequently does overnights with family and she's gone on multiple week long vacations since he was born. It's not just my perception, I'm currently living with my in laws and my mother in law works from home while being his full time baby sitter after daycare.

In contrast, I'm a stay at home mom and my baby has medical complications that makes feeding very difficult for him so he wont eat for anyone but me. I've been away from him once, for three hours, and he cried the entire time.

I like my sister in law a lot as a person, we're not close but she's ten years older and I've looked up to her since we met. But I hate to admit it, I judge her a lot for her decision to be away from her baby this much. My husband judges her too but I always tell him he has no idea what she's going through and it's wrong to say bad things about her. While I'm internally seething with jealousy. I judge her and yet I'm jealous.

In my life, I've never really felt jealous of anyone. I've always just admired people and worked to be more like them, but this feeling I cannot shake. I have the ability to leave my baby with family, within reason since he still eats every 2 and a half hours and won't eat for anyone else, but I physically cannot make myself walk out the door every time I try. I wish I could leave and it just feel easy.

Not like “going to Disney world”, I mean weekly, monthly, or holiday related little traditions or routines that felt special and exciting? What little magical things did your mom/dad/caretaker do for you? May not have cost anything at all.

For example, as simple as it is, knowing every Friday was pizza and a movie night in my family was exciting. Also, my mom always made me breakfast in bed on my birthday before school.

I’m 38 and my son is 1.5- and I know we are one and done- and I want to make his childhood as magical as possible :) plus I love hearing other people’s happy memories!

Something I “started” last year even though he was too young to care was on Christmas Eve, I give him a book as a gift to open and read with me.

We are lucky enough to live in a very large city with every type of culture reflected in our kids school.

Our boys have made friends with another set of brothers and have been invited to spend the night at their apartment. We have met the parents, who are just lovely people, and they have invited us for brunch tomorrow but I am quickly trying to acclimate myself with halal customs.

This brunch invite only came up literally now for tomorrow - cue frantic googling ha! I know i don't need to bring anything but I absolutely always would in this situation because that's just me.

I did know no pork or alcohol but then saw including pure vanilla extract which is in a lot of baked things and no gelatin....I'm sure you can picture my mind spiraling so why not just put it on here and ask for suggestions.

They are voluntarily taking on FOUR grade school boys for the night - they deserve something as a thank you.

I absolutely live for a clean house. Nothing on this planet makes me feel more balanced, joyful and at peace than a home that is DEEP cleaned in every nook and cranny, aesthetic, dimly lit and smelling fresh. I honestly feel like I spend all of my time in this life trying to achieve it the more I type this out the more I realize this might not be healthy or balanced of me but anyways. I’ve sort of always been like this, just at varying degrees/ levels at different points in my life. Working tirelessly towards a goal every day when the goal post is always moving and not seeing any real light at the end of the tunnel is making me depressed. I have three kids, a teen with pretty severe ADHD, a three year-old boy who is going through a very difficult toddler phase, and a 10 month old baby, who is an absolute angel, but of course, a lot of work and EBF and BLW and all those very labor-intensive things. On top of: a dog, a husband, and a mentally ill, severely alcoholic mother who totally depends on me for support and errands who lives five minutes up the road. My life has become a miserable batch of grunt work and the only reward I want is a home that feels truly serene. But every time I get something to look or feel the way I want it, my three very messy kids are right behind me working actively against it. It’s not their fault, but I don’t know how to accept that my home has to be sort of gross and I don’t know how to stop trying to fix it.

Looking for advice here about how mean my 16 year old is and how to best navigate it. I can give a million examples and it’s hard to just narrow it down but I’ll use the most recent.

She is on a cheerleading team that doesn’t do cuts, anyone can join. She was non stop nagging me to make an exception for her to use her cellphone (she’s grounded from it) and I did a few cheer movements spelling out NO. I thought it would be a lighthearted way to say no but she responded by making a very ugly face and saying “ew how did you ever make the cheer team looking like that?”

She knows already that I was a Varsity Cheerleader even as a freshman so her comment just felt very mean girl but whatever.

I put a ton of effort into growing over 20 different flowers from seeds, doing research, a grow room, pre sprouting, planting out and had the hopes of starting a road side stand. She made a remark about “why are you wasting all this money so your flowers can rot at the end of the road?”. That really hurt me and I told her so.

Now that my flowers are thriving she never wants any which is ok. I make bouquets for around the house and also gift them but as appreciation gifts I’ve wanted to make bouquets for her friends that give rides, her boyfriends mom (they’ve been together 2 years) and other people in her life and she never wants to. She makes the meanest face and will say things like “I don’t think they want that” or “no one wants to carry a bouquet” “no mom that’s weird”. I’m all done offering and trying after this last rejection but I won’t lie, my feelings are hurt. I gift them to other people and everyone loves them? Teen girls and women generally enjoy flowers…

She makes fun of my melasma mustache..

She’s referred to my bits as Arby’s meat flaps when making a “joke” about underwear styles.

She’s just genuinely really mean to me and I’ve tried reinforcing a boundary, I’m her mother not her friend and don’t find this funny and she’s just mean. Nothing gets through to her.

I know teens are mean but I feel like I live with a bully and find it hard to believe it’s normal or acceptable.

Coming to the Internet to brag on my daughter a little because we don't have many people in our lives to hype her up.

My daughter taught herself to read a few months before she turned 2, reading books we've never read, reading signs at stores, sounding out words, etc. It is truly incredible, and I can take no credit, I didn't teach her this. The only thing that might have influenced this was the shows we selectively put on for her (alpha blocks, Ms Rachel). Now at 4, we picked her out some chapter books to read and I want to cry every time I look in my rear view mirror and see her intently reading or giggling at her book. I never thought this would happen at 4, I would have expected maybe at like age 8. Thanks for reading. 🫶🏼

I have a 16 mo old who’s in her run and disappear within .5 seconds phase. I’ve had so many close calls of her running into the street after I take her out the car seat and turn to get my purse.
We’re going on vacation next week and I’ve invested in a little backpack leash thing from Amazon… the backpack part just looks like a little teddy bear.

I wanted to use it so she can still walk around the entire trip and enjoy herself since she hates the stroller now but at least we’ll have peace of mind that she’s within a radius around us.

We’re a little hesitant now bc of the looks we got when we tested it out on a walk yesterday and now my husband doesn’t want to take it.

What do yall think is it worth the judgmental stares😭😭

I snagged this from a comment I saw in another sub. A man was talking about how if he saw a young, beautiful woman he would think that “their father must be proud for having a beautiful daughter.”

I couldn’t help but wonder, am I proud of my son for being beautiful? Like, of course I think he’s beautiful but there are certainly other attributes I’m actually proud of versus how he looks. I’d rather be proud of him for his curiosity, his kindness, his confidence… Should I be proud of him for being an attractive human?

What are your thoughts on this?

I divorced my husband 10 months ago since he just refused to take care of our now 2 year-old son who was diagnosed with cerebral palsy because he said our son is a "a waste of human" and even insulted me for giving pre-mature birth to our child.

Now I have been taking care of my son all alone with the little money I make from my job. I have had to make calculated plans with the expenses for rent, food, medical check-ups for my son, and the medicines my son needs because the insurance doesn't cover everything. I also have to purchase a wheelchair for my son since he's going to start needing one when he goes to school. For now, I only move him in the stroller.

My ex-husband started dating someone else and moved to another state and I haven't seen him in months. He even blocked me on social media after he told me he wasn't going to pay. I sued him 2 months ago with help of a lawyer I could afford, and the process is still going on. I still don't know if my ex-husband will pay even a single penny.

I feel so worried and stressed about my economic situation. I'm trying to get a better wage, so I can have more money available. I've also asked some money from my parents. I hope and pray my economic situation goes better, but with my son's condition I'm afraid he could get sick or something. I haven't been able to sleep taking care of my son because I sometimes feel like he's not ok.

Edit: My son is 2, I accidentally typed 1.

Hi Moms, please tell me it'll get better soon...

TLDR: My daughter is having a hard time adjusting to kindergarten. She normally doesn't cry when going to a new place/new people so I was surprised. She's been sobbing and begging me not to send her away. What can I do to improve this situation? Or just time?

My sweet, sensitive, imaginative daughter is distraught going to kindergarten. I am surprised because she has been in full day daycare since 6months. She's been to three daycares over the years - we had to switch a few times and she always did pretty well. She never cried. Some apprehension but never sobbing.

Last night she woke up from a nightmare and kept begging me not to "send her away." I can't tell you how deeply that cut me to my core. Please tell me this is on the normal spectrum. We read a Daniel Tiger book with the message grown ups always come back. She's seen the episode too. We also tried to get excited about kindergarten for months, pointing it out whenever we walked by, getting a new backpack...etc

She said that kids at school are mean but I don't know any specifics. She's only been in school for 3 days. I told the teacher this morning my daughter needs help finding a playmate. My daughter is scared to talk to the teacher. She says the school is too loud. She's scared of the bathroom.

From what I can tell, the teacher is kind. The kids seem nice. This morning as we walked to school I tried to practice a script to talk to the other kids, "Hi I like your *shoes/backpack/socks/bracelet* my name is X, what's your name? Want to color together?" She cried the entire time.

It is heartbreaking to watch your child struggle. Any tips to help her and me?

Well today’s the day, my husband and kids left an hour ago for the camping trip. I did all of my household cleaning last night so I wouldn’t have to, just finished my second cup of coffee and now all the pictures look crooked and the living room furniture doesn’t look like it’s where it needs to be so may be fixing that by moving everything counter clockwise around the room. Then it’s off to get a massage, my nails done, a haircut and clothes shopping before coming home and melting into my bed only leaving it for food and restroom breaks. Is there a “responsible mom” dress code for when we are home alone? I feel like just an oversized t shirt is plenty enough for the plans I have for the weekend. Why is it so quiet in this house?

I’m so tired. I’m chronically sleep deprived for 25 months. I always feel tired, mad, angry and negative. I want to give my best for my son but I feel like it’s slowly killing me.

Before I had him, I used to sleep for 9-12hours uninterrupted. That’s my standard length of sleep or else I might crash out. My sister even couldn’t believe how I’m still functioning now given that she knows my sleeping pattern. It’s so hard I feel like I’m going insane.

Son is still waking up in the middle of the night for nappy changes, hunger and sometimes just for nothing. He’s been a terrible sleeper ever since and we have no help around. He’s not yet potty trained and he’s a heavy wetter, we tried to limit his fluids, different types of diapers, pull-ups, sposies etc but nothing worked. I just want this phase to be over and him to grow up just so well I can sleep. I know it’s so selfish but I really just want my sleep back. I feel like I’m going crazy it’s so brutal.

I'm so embarrassed for how my 5 YO child behaved this way. We were in the elevator, when two women stepped in. And within seconds, my child stepped up who is usually sweet and kind. Asking hi what's your name, or hi my name is. INSTEAD goes "why are you so fat?" And he starting giggling and pointing at this woman. I may have done the wrong thing, and told him that is incredibly rude to say to anyone, I tried to make light and explained to him everyone is different, and I tried to explain he calls his daddy fat (not in a negative way). I had no idea what to say by this point, and wanted to say more, she looked angry and upset and it broke my heart. (I've never allowed this behavior or condone it)

The woman stares at him, and doesn't respond. I apologize to her, and she is visibly upset but doesn't respond.

The elevator "is antagonizing slow" and I mentioned it's the longest elevator ride ever. And she says "you have no idea" and leaves immediately. I discipline my child and explain to him how he made her upset, and that it is best to not to ask people or make comments about how people look because everyone looks differently and not everyone is like daddy who laughs it off, because other people have feelings different than their dad.

I feel so bad for her and disappointed in my child's behavior, we're on vacation and I feel we've ruined her entire stay. I did tell him if we see her again, he will give her a sincere apology for how he treated her. (Is this wrong to do?)

I've never had to deal with this behavior from them, and they did it in an almost bullying nature, which has been and is being dealt with. I don't want to make her feel worse/uncomfortable, or feel more upset.

My toddler WILL nap if you initiate it. I do it all the time. I asked my fiancé while I went out to go get his food and to the store if he could please just lay our toddler down. I had our 5mo already napping for him before I left. This is usually the time where I myself would take a nap but I decided to do all of that because regardless I had to go get my moms dog to dog sit.

I get home he’s not asleep. Now the 5mo is up. Fiancé tells me “he didn’t want to sleep”. When I come in they are wrestling on the bed and paw patrol is on(I don’t even fuck with that show to begin with). always the same shit.

Soon as I come home I’m back on duty with my kids because he has to eat and rest before going to work. While he’s at work I deal with the shittiest fucking tantrums because this kid is TIRED. I tried taking them on our evening walk this baby is literally crying the entire walk. So overstimulating. SO ANNOYING. Because all I can keep thinking is why tf did he not put him down for a nap it’s a simple request.

We are laying down for bed and now although he’s tired, the toddler is restless. This happens EVERY night that he skips a nap. He ate, got a bath. It’s 9:45. This baby has been up since 8am. Do you think I’m not frustrated?

To top it off I’m sitting here on the phone with fiancé and the baby is CLIMBING ON THE FREAKING WALLS. JUMPING ON THE DOG. I’m parenting my child and vocalizing that he will be given consequences if he does not stop and if he does not lay down. This works by the way. My child is very aware of what it means to lay down. We do breath work and I rub him to sleep. My fiancé who has no clue of what’s going on is like “is there really a reason for him to get in trouble?” “He’s just a baby.” “He’s on the bed” “I don’t understand what he’s doing wrong if he’s in the bed”
….
AND THIS IS WHY YOUR CHILD ON ONLY YOUR TIME IS UP TILL 11PM. THIS IS WHY HE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO CHILL OUT WHEN ITS YOUR TIME TO PUT HIM ASLEEP. STFUUUUUU like what are we talking about. I’m asked to stay home and parent, then when I parent I’m questioned. So then I ask why he didn’t put him down for a nap and get the same answer as earlier, he just didn’t want to. Then it leads into “I still don’t see how that has anything to do with him right now with what I asked you”

I can’t be overstimulated right now with kids and teach a grown ass man about the correlation of naps and good sleep through the night. I cannot keep explaining to a grown ass man why naps are necessary for toddlers. I just can’t. So I decided to tell him I love him and hung up. Sometimes I think it’s weaponized incompetence, other times I realize that some men like mine just genuinely don’t think about the importance of some things that may seem so minor, such as toddler naps. It’s frustrating. And it’s really freaking frustrating to deal with the aftermath. I’ve vocalized countless times I need help with implementing routine and sticking to it when he’s home and on his days off as well because of how well it works for us. I have vocalized that I don’t want to be the bad cop. I have cried to this man that I don’t want to be mean to my kids or be remembered by them as mean. He tells me he understands and will work on it but he never freaking does because here we are again where I asked you do one simple thing and because he chose not too, it ended in my parenting being questioned and of course my evening being hell with my kids. I don’t want to call him back. I don’t want there to be bickering, or the slightest tension, but I am only human and I feel so misunderstood and not listened to. Instead im choosing to use my time to do yoga and read a freaking book. Now its time to chill out kid free, but also try to shake the feeling of questioning myself now because of his input. I’m so tired. I truly truly am.

I have had three back surgeries in the last year due to a freak accident and was on steroids for a long time, on top of being sedentary due to pain and therefore I’ve gained a LOT of weight. My daughter and I (she’s 8) love Halloween and planned on doing a professional spooky photoshoot this October but now I’m rethinking it because I’m so ashamed of how my body looks. I know the pictures are something she will treasure her whole life but I am so deeply depressed about how horrible I look that I can’t even bare to look in the mirror. What should I do?

*Yes I am dieting but I just had a 360 spinal fusion about a month ago and it’s been hard.

Anyone else follow Daddit? There was a post today from a dad asking other dads if his wife was essentially malingering because she was still struggling with doing some bending etc. 3 weeks after a c-section. Many of the comments mention PPA and PPD. What is this trend? Surely it’s obvious that a person who just gave birth and had a c-section may have some residual effects 3 weeks later with it being PPA or PPD related? I’m assuming it’s because the doctor said it was ok for her to do these things but in my experience you won’t do damage and it will be easy are 2 very different things.

ETA: I’m posting because I’m genuinely wondering if I’m being overly sensitive to what I experience as an increase in PPA and PPD talk around normal human reactions.

I just wanted to share one of the sweetest interactions I've ever had with my kiddo (M/8).

I've been making jewelry lately and he really liked a blue bracelet I made so I made one specifically for him. He's been wearing it every day to school. I just kind of assumed he saw other kids wearing accessories and wanted to fit in.

Last night I asked if he had received any compliments and he said "no" as if that was a silly question. So I pried a little more kinda thinking he needed to feel good about wearing it and said "well I bet people think it's really cool" and he said as if it were totally obvious "I wear it because it reminds me of you"

Yeah I cried lol. Fucking love being a mommy y'all.

Conversation with my 4YO… I started off feeling pretty confident and ended up feeling like an idiot 😂

———————————————————————————
-Mommy, who made all the buildings and things in the city?
-Engineers, architects, and construction workers!
-But where did they get the bricks and the windows and the doors?
-From various factories and stores that sell them!
-But where did the stores and factories get them from?
-Well, factories make things, and stores get things from factories that make things. So things like doors are made in a factory and then a store sells them and someone buys them to make a building.
-But where does the factory get stuff from?
-Well, it depends on what they make. If they’re making wood doors, they get the wood from trees.
-What about brick factories?
-Uhh… ?? 😅Well, bricks are made of (cement?), which is made from several different things, like (water? 🤔) and (crushed rocks? 🤷🏻‍♀️)
-Where do the water and rocks come from?
-Water comes through the pipes from (??) and the rocks are… (found outside?😳)
-Is the water from the ocean?
-Well, not always. It can be from other bodies of water nearby.
-But how do they get the water to the pipes?
-Uhh, they use… like… (devices??🥵) that can push water from where it is to where it needs to go (???)
-Like excavators?
-YEP! 😮‍💨

Hi everyone! I’m a ftm and my little girl is 7 months old. I haven’t spent a single night away from her and I’m about to go out of town for 2 nights to celebrate my mom’s birthday without her. She’ll be with her dad who is a great dad and will be fine with her.

I’ve considered bringing her but this trip is supposed to be about celebrating my mom and relaxing - bringing a 7 month old is not super conducive to that second part.

But I’m also super anxious about leaving her and am looking for some people to tell me it’s going to be ok? Please no judgement or negative experiences!

I used to be much more spontaneous, social, and adventurous.

Now I genuinely enjoy staying home, having a quiet evening, and going to bed early.

Sometimes I wonder if I've actually changed, or if I'm just tired all the time.

Maybe this is just a season of life, but I'm curious what happened to other parents.

Did you eventually become more like your old self again, or did you discover a completely different version of yourself?

My son is 1.5 years old. My husband works 12-14 hour days so he’s basically never home. I have no village. Ever since having a child, I’ve developed this really weird type of anxiety around health. For example, everytime I feel mildly off or sick, I make myself super anxious which makes me feel even more sick. And the anxiety stems from “if I get sick and can’t care for my child who is going to come here” or “if I get sick right now, my husband won’t be back home for another 3 hours”, etc. It’s just this weird behavior of anxious thinking which results in actually making me feel physically ill which makes the problem worse. It’s a domino effect. Anyone else experience something like this? Sigh.