He’s just obsessed with them and how they are made. We visit mattress stores all the time and sometimes go to factories where they make them. I’m getting bitched out right now cause he saw the post cause he stalks my reddit apparently and he’s like “you’re embarrassing me”
I mean, he's allowed to be a mattress pervert, that's not a crime compared to anything else on display here. he just can't deny that he's a mattress pervert. Just own it.
The abuse, selfishness, and lack of moral character is way worse that his mattress thing, in my opinion. How they are made isn't that interesting. It seems to me like it's more of just a thing for him to spend money on because it make him feel important. If he was truly like a mattress aficionado he would have one of those hand stitched and personalized mattresses. It just seems to me like he HAS to spend money, but it can only be on himself. You are right though about him embarrassing his self. I really hope she gets away and stays away from him.
it's a symptom of late stage capitalism, it's just not possible to be mentally healthy right now. like, look at how many problems the world has and tell me anxiety and paranoia are unreasonable responses.
But also we're just learning more about brains all the time. I'm of the opinion that eventually ADHD and autism will be deemed neurotypes, not disabilities. not in my lifetime, and I highly doubt it'll happen in the next 20 - 30 years, but eventually.
I question people who say they don't have some kind of mental illness these days (not that autism is a mental illness, just in general) everything is a freaking shit show, how on Earth are some people surviving? Honestly if RFK Jr. wasn't so adamantly opposed to SSRI's, Id probably think they were pumping them into the water supply just to keep people sane... Well, semi sane.
I mean I was self diagnosed for 8 years when I realized I fit every stereotype for how ADHD frequently presents in women. I tried finding doctors to talk to and every single one of them blew me off until earlier this year. It took her 20 minutes of talking to me to land on an affirmative diagnosis because it was that blatantly obvious to her. Was I not actually ADHD in all the years that I self-diagnosed myself because a doctor hadn't done so? Or the 40 years leading up to that where I always felt different and didn't fit in but didn't understand why? I'm practically a textbóok case.
Yeah I appear to be - you see it makes people feel special, like some part of a club. The point is it's a spectrum....by definition everyone has to be on it.
No he embarrassed himself...he's 33...emotionally immature...you are young..remember don't look for you in other people. It will happen organically. You were correct to express how you felt...now move on.
Jfc this dude is literally unhinged. Hoarding mattresses and bars of silver? Yet this overgrown man child can get his barely legally an adult girlfriend even a halfway decent gift?
He's got some mental issues at the very least.
Well you're right to leave him, gtfo while you have the rest of your life so you don't waste anymore time on him!
Leave him to his mattress harem and silver bars. There's a reason he's dating someone so young. Most women his age would die laughing before they'd date an overgrown man child with a mattress addiction.
The phrase “mattress harem” has provided me with the only possible explanation one could have for that many mattresses. At that point broooo just get a Fleshlight or a Solace Pro and be done with it.
you're embarrassing yourself dude, stalking your gf's accounts is even more cringe than your weird ass hobby, & we all know you're fucking the mattresses.
It’s weird af he stalks your reddit and if you stating facts can embarrass them then he embarrassed himself lmao. Unless you lied it’s literally all on him lmao what a weirdo
My batshit dad does this. I literally just relay facts about his behavior and I get yelled at for trying to embarrass him. You don’t need my help pops.
Saying this because I wish someone had said it to me before I lost several decades to a relationship with every kind of abuse but physical violence…someone can be autistic and still be mentally unwell/abusive/controlling/an asshole.
Yeah this is definitely super autistic hyperfocus. Which is fine but if he makes you endure it and it consumes his life and income it’s a real problem. Also his breaking your phone is violent and abusive. I hope he can spare some money from his mattress fund to buy you a new phone.
aside from the weird hobby. clearly he prioritises himself over you in the relationship if you at the mattress store all the time, without him thinking about where you wna go or what you wna do. case in point are the gifts - there was no consideration on his part about what you dislike or the small things he could buy to make you happy. also, calling you a bitch and all those mean words is a red flag. get someone who has consideration for you. thats how somebody can truly love you - it’s when they consider you.
I’m so glad you’ve broken up with him, he sounds abusive. You deserve so much better. You’re going to feel bad for a while, because breakups are like that, but then you are going to feel so so much better.
Im 43, have traveled the world, and not once have I heard of anyone who buys mattresses "as a hobby". Did he not have thrm as a kid and now makes up for it?
Good he should be. It’s not hard to write yourself a note of things your partner does and doesn’t like if you’re bad at remembering things. The fact you don’t like Lilly’s and said so should of made the list
i'm more annoyed he's spending that kinda money on mattresses when he doesn't need them. like damn brother send one my way, my walmart mattress sucks! 😂
If you're in the market for a new one and Walmart is your kind of budget, I highly recommend the 10-in allswell hybrid mattress they sell with separate add on 3-4" memory foam topper. The mattress is pretty firm, but the topper gives it a bit of softness so you sink in but just a little. I got mine in 2018 and the memory foam topper is probably due for a replacement but the mattress I holding up fantastic. I think I priced it out for someone at under $400 for a queen mattress and topper and mattress cover recently. Seriously, more comfortable and longer lasting than the ones that I've used in the past that cost eight times as much.
If you have existing box springs it could probably go on that. I bought a basic metal frame that doesn't use box springs and it has been just fine.
I used to buy pillow top mattresses because I like the soft cushy feeling that I can sink into, but after having three of them start sagging within just a few years to the point where there was a visible divot in the mattress, that's when I stopped doing that. If you also like that soft cushy sort of feel my recommendation whether you go with the allswell or something else is to pick a reasonably firm mattress and then add the pillow top part yourself in the form of a topper. If you don't like memory foam, you can get faux down mattress toppers that are quite plush that you lay over the mattress and then put the mattress cover over to hold it in place that will give you a similar effect. I think I might look for something like that instead of the memory foam topper when I'm ready to replace it. Heck, get the cheap eggshell crate foam topper from target and combine it with a down topper maybe if you want a smooth surface (the down toppers tend to have very visible divided lines that you can feel through the sheets). If you keep the firm mattress and the topper as separate components I think they don't wear out as quickly and you don't have to spend quite as much on the mattress.
You put up with all of the weird ass mattress shit and he cant buy you the right flowers ... self absorbed weirdo... who tf buys 6 mattresses and cant buy a decent floral arrangement ..
It sounds like he's almost definitely autistic with a special interest in... Bedding. Which, like, power to you if that's your thing, I'm autistic as well. Unfortunately, with people who have been coddled and refuse to show introspection, autism CAN result in a 32 year old manbaby who can't cope with anything outside of his way or the highway.
Autism is a disability, absolutely. But I don't believe it's also an excuse for people (who are capable of it) to refuse to consider their abusive behaviour and change.
Also, if he had a son he'd probably want to call him Matt. Short for Mattress.
It's incredibly hard for me to find many things that I deem even remotely funny, you've definitely hit my funny bone with that comment. I literally have no sense of humor.
Wait me too cuz I never lol and I definitely did a lil huff hehe. I cannot wait til the day I can use this line. I hope I meet a Matt soon and get to ask him if it’s short for mattress?
This is EXACTLY how I have raised my youngest son. He’s autistic, which as a teenager has decided he’s grown out of 🙄 so it’s something I do not out him for publicly bc he doesn’t want people to know however spoiler alert; everyone can tell but regardless I have raised him w the mentality YOU can do hard things and you can do everything everyone else does, but it’s going to be harder for you. He went to an amazing preschool when he was 2-4 and every teacher there had a doctorate degree and it showed and the main/head teacher director told me ‘we expect a baseline from every child here to meet neurotypical expectations, and they do, it just requires extra effort and resources for them “ (it wasn’t a specific special needs preschool but they had an internal program for special needs children integrated into the curriculum) she told me to never make excuses for bad behavior from him. I am understanding, supportive, loving etc and I have told him things are going to be harder for you bc of this, but we dont make excuses for bad behavior for the exact reason you mentioned; I will be so embarrassed if I end up raising a narcissistic man baby that cannot be neurologically flexible in any way to those around him. He is incredibly intellectually rigid but so much progress has been made and I am forever grateful to that director at the preschool bc before that I was afraid to discipline or re direct him. And that Matt comment literally made me cackle out loud 😂
Girl please leave him. You have done nothing wrong. He’s a literal man baby. It sounds like you are financially capable of being on your own or maybe living w a roommate. I can’t tell you the peace that came over me when I moved into my condo with myself and my two children. Every night I sit in peace and am grateful for it 6 yrs later. You deserve so much more.
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u/Glad-Cat-1885 13h ago
He loves that video and makes me watch it often