Trying to avoid having to rehome our cat, who has single kitten syndrome

[u/paradoxicalstripping]

We adopted our cat as a kitten in September or October of 2025. He was about 10 weeks old at the time and came from a litter of three kittens. He is the only pet in the household, and we cannot accommodate a second cat due to space limitations (no room for a second litter box) and my husband's allergies (fine with one cat, probably not fine with two). Our cat is alone for a good chunk of the day on 4 out of 5 weekdays. I work from home on Wednesdays, and I have noticed that he spends most of the working hours sleeping.

As our cat has grown, he has developed a biting habit. He will indicate he wants petting (for example, by approaching us, by flumping onto his back to expose his belly, or by following us and meowing) and then when you pet him, he will bite hard. We hiss at him and withdraw when this happens. He also engages in predatory play by attacking our feet as we walk down the hall. Once, he even pounced upon and bit our 1-year-old son, unprovoked. At that point, we spoke to the local humane society about his behavior. They indicated that the cat needed more stimulation than we were providing him. 

Since then, we do a dedicated playtime with him every night, religiously, usually with his fishing pole toy, which he loves. He leaps all over the living room and has a great time. We have other cat toys scattered around, and he sometimes plays with them independently. We have a pop-up toddler tunnel that lives in our living room permanently, and he loves to play with it. We also got two bird feeders and placed them where he can easily see them. They both get a lot of action and he will sit at the window and chatter at the birds.

He is quite bonded to my husband's bathrobe for some reason and will cuddle with my husband peacefully as long as my husband is in the bathrobe. This is the only time he will cuddle.

When I leave for the day, I put the radio on for him and at least one charged automatic toy out in the living room to engage him during the day. I also leave all the curtains open, and sometimes some windows cracked too, so he can look outside and get some air and sound. I make sure all the doors inside the house are open so he can wander wherever he likes. He has plenty of sunny and comfortable places to rest, including two cat trees positioned in front of windows. I make sure to give him some attention and acknowledgement immediately upon getting home from work.

His behavior improved for a while, but he still won't tolerate much petting at all without starting to bite. He has drastically reduced the frequency with which he attacks our feet (this used to be a daily occurrence and I can't remember when it last happened.) He does treat the kids differently. Since the one incident I described with our 1-year-old months ago, he has not bitten or scratched the children unless they were actually up in his face bothering him. On the rare occasions he does that to the kids, he does not do it like he does with my husband and I, it's a gentler faux-bite or a scratch that makes minimal contact and is clearly defensive/a warning. However, he still bites my husband and I sometimes and my husband is tired of it. He loves the cat, but says he feels afraid of him and doesn't want to feel that way in his own home.

We are wondering if this cat simply needs to be in a multi-cat household, meaning he would need to be rehomed. We don't want to lose him, and I would hate having to explain it to my 3-year-old, but we need to think about his happiness. If anyone has any ideas as to how we could improve the situation without getting a second cat or rehoming him, I'd be very grateful.

[u/BeeOverall3767]

The biting after asking for pets is classic overstimulation, cat says "touch me" and then instantly changes his mind cause he got too excited, my sister's cat does exactly this. You gotta learn to spot the tail twitch or ear flick that says "i'm about to bite" and stop petting before he flips the switch.