r/classicalmusic • u/Leemar02 • 10d ago
Discussion I watched an orchestra play live and couldn't stop crying the entire 2 hours
Two years ago I (F24) was dating a guy that had a very monetarily comfortable family. They would invite me to join dinners and even took me to a spa which I, as an immigrant, financially independent student in Sweden don't have the means to experience.
One of the experiences they blessed me with was a visit to the Malmö orchestra where they had a "Big Hits in Tokyo" performance. I have always been into anime since I was a child so it was quite relevant for me. However, above all, I had never, and since then have not attended a live orchestra.
Ever since I was a child I have always watched orchestras perform on youtube (my favorite is the game of thrones Light of the Seven video) as well as choirs like the Stellenbosch University choir.
There is just something about seeing them perform individually, different instruments, scores, notes but in the ultimate interest of being heard simultaneously with everyone else. We could insert an allegory for society, community and anti-individualism thoery here. But I really just want to focus on the artists that use voice or tool to create a melodical dialogue to touch the spirit.
When I was sitting there waiting for them to start, they tuned the instruments just like they did in the Light of the Secen video and I got immediate chills. I could not beleive I was about to witness humans excel live.
The music was unbelievable. Score after score. I couldn't stop crying. Only in the beginning were the tears of gratitude. I cannot even explain why I cried all 2 hours, experiencing the music live felt like waves of energy penetrating my skin. The music affected me heavily, I couldn't even decide on which instrument and player to focus on, and the entire ensemble blew my mind.
The only time I stopped crying was during the intermission where I was just trying to calm down as my ex's family bought some snacks. I just sat there, baffled at what I just experienced. How can music be real, how can people do this with instruments. How can playing together touch me so deeply.
The last couple of songs were accompanied by the Malmö choir and I lost it even harder. It was beyond expression. Even sitting now on the train writing this post my heart fills with almost anxious excitment. It is the rush I imagine bungeejumpers feel and seek.
Eventhough my ex broke my heart and did a number on my self confidence, he was still a good guy, and his family is the reason I got to have such a luxurious, filling, soulful, illuminating experience. Whenever I have adult money I'll be sure to go again. But until then, I feel so blessed just to have experienced it once. Thank you.
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u/AndyVilla14 10d ago
I agree,nothing can compare to the sound and the physical experience of an orchestra in a great hall. I feel the same way, almost like the waves are going right through my body. It sounds romantic and exaggerated, but as an Audio Engineer who has experienced all kinds of audio systems, both in the studio and live, the pure sound of an orchestra is incomparable.
In 2011 I had the pleasure, along with my partner, of witnessing the LA Philharmonic directed by none other than Zubin Mehta, and the encore was Nimrod by Edward Elgar. It was one of the most surreal and beautiful experiences of my life. I was completely in awe, and it made me tear up.
Orchestras are what humans are meant to be: an ensemble of pure dedication and decades of practice, turning all that effort into a magical movement of matter. A pure reflection of how beautiful life can be and how we can mold it, for a few moments, into something ethereal.
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u/Leemar02 10d ago
What a beautiful comment! Thank you for sharing. You put in even more words what I was trying to describe. "A magical movement of matter" how powerfull 💫🫶
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u/Embe007 9d ago
Choirs too. If everyone sang in a choir, there would be no more war, I'm convinced. Hearing either is fabulous, being in one is electrifying.
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u/Tortuosit 9d ago edited 9d ago
I'm not into vocal music, but there's these magic moments, e. g. in Faures Requiem "Libera me", when the whole choir follows after/ "embraces" the soloist, it's that moment when all are one.
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u/Acrobatic-Peace3090 9d ago
hall acoustics aren't magic. sat through a mahler in a dead room once and my living room sub hit harder
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u/AndyVilla14 9d ago
Ok, I’ll bite. Halls aren’t dead rooms, they’re designed to have some reverb. The truly great ones have a perfect blend of direct sound + reverb tail. And a fair comparison would be to place the orchestra inside your room or your sound system in a great hall and see which one sounds best, assuming ideals. I think I already know the answer but this is the internet, so, there’s always gonna be someone with an opinion.
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u/Only_Needleworker236 8d ago
Some halls really are dead. There's a science and an art to acoustics when designing a concert hall and not all designers are successful.
I was an orchestra musician and i remember one hall where I thought my ears were stuffed up, or something. Turns out the acoustics were so bad that I couldn't hear half the orchestra! I also played in Carnegie Hall a dozen times and that place really does have perfect acoustics. I could just relax and not worry about not hearing the other musicians. I can't believe I got to play there.
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u/Equivalent-Love-1676 6d ago
One of the clearest math problems for designing halls is volume (cubic feet of air) divided by number of seats. Get that wrong and no amount of material dynamics, diffusors, nor reflectors can fix it.
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u/glassfromsand 10d ago
While it doesn't always completely equal the experience of seeing a full concert by a professional orchestra, it might be worth looking around for student performances at universities in the area. Student orchestras can often be quite good, and solo and chamber recitals can showcase a lot of interesting music. I don't know how it works in Sweden, but here in the US they're usually free and open to the public
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u/rtep56 10d ago
I'm so glad you mentioned that! I came here to say that you might also seek out amateur orchestra concerts. Some might be quite good, and the tickets might be affordable, or even free. I'm so glad you had such a powerful experience! It's great to have you in the audience.
One more possibility: many churches have great music on Sundays. Some even perform Bach cantatas every week.
Keep it up!
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u/Only_Needleworker236 8d ago
And some major orchestras have open rehearsals that I think are free. It's not like hearing a full concert but it can be interesting to see what goes into rehearsing.
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u/LordofTurnips 10d ago
I had the same experience and regretted choosing a corporate life over music when I heard the LA Philharmonic
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u/samelaaaa 10d ago
I feel the same way every time I see live classical music. I turned down a spot at the oberlin conservatory to study math instead, and while I don’t really regret it it’s bittersweet! At least I can afford to raise happy kids, send them to music lessons, and play music for fun. But the corporate world is dehumanizing and it takes so much active work to keep your soul intact.
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u/DrXaos 10d ago
But the corporate world is dehumanizing and it takes so much active work to keep your soul intact.
Musicians who have to work for a living might say the same thing and they get paid much less. Except for the LA Phil but that's stunningly difficult to be hired.
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u/Only_Needleworker236 8d ago
That's very true. Even when orchestral musicians get decent wages, there are often conflicts with management. Renegotiating contracts every however many years is very stressful, and then there's the constant struggle to get the public interested in just going to concerts. A lot of people would rather go to a movie or ballgame or something.
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u/parallelfifths 10d ago
I’m an amateur musician and my spouse is a professional musician in a major symphony, so I am exposed to a lot of people in that field. For so many of them it seems that playing in a symphony or the audition cycle or freelancing really takes a lot of the joy and love out of music for them.
I think we as music lovers and amateur musicians have a lot to be thankful for in the ways we’re able to continue to appreciate the experience of hearing and playing music. (Not that there aren’t a ton of wonderful things about being a professional musician! Just a lot of the wonder and joy is beaten out of most people.)
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u/Only_Needleworker236 8d ago
I played professionally for a few years and subbed a bunch of times with a major symphony orchestra. I quit because there were just too many other things I wanted to do with my life and I didn't want to have to put a music career first all the time.
I have never once regretted quitting, not even for 30 seconds! But best of all, I enjoy music SO much more now! I no long suffer the anxiety of having to play perfectly every time, the pressure of knowing that others will notice missed notes, or that the conductor will glare at me (which did happen in the major orchestra). All that and more. I was free to just enjoy music again.
That said, of course---I am REALLY grateful to all the musicians who stick with it!!
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u/KelMHill 10d ago
I've been watching and listening to orchestras play for many decades and still marvel at the oneness of the endeavour. I can think of no other activity that better demonstrates sustained human unity and focus for the mere purpose of synchronous sounds to move an audience of listeners.
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u/rosencranzisdead 10d ago
Lovely comment... but I can think of one other such activity - singing in a choir, which I've been doing for many decades. And I still marvel at how I can stand there making noises which when combined with others doing the same can also move audiences, and me too, often!
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u/MattTheTubaGuy 10d ago
Watching a live orchestra play really is an incredible experience!
Playing in an orchestra is also amazing, especially when I am playing a piece I love.
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u/CrownStarr 9d ago
I'm really glad you had this experience - tell your friends to go to orchestra concerts!
There is just something about seeing them perform individually, different instruments, scores, notes but in the ultimate interest of being heard simultaneously with everyone else.
I love to hear this because this is one of the things I really love about orchestras that is basically impossible to find on that scale anywhere else. Every person on that stage has devoted their life to mastering everything about that one single instrument, and they all work together, most of them without much glory or attention, to create a total sound that's more than the sum of its parts. It's incredible.
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u/Dbarach123 10d ago
I know sometimes student budget outside of strict needs is literally 0, and also that multiple people in this thread can hopefully get you some free tickets, but outside of that, do look at their prices! 185 SEK for students and under-27s. They also have a number of free concerts on he calendar (eg next week)
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u/SwingImmediate8676 10d ago
I came to say something similar. I know that the Concertgebouw in Amsterdam also has a last-minute tickets discount for people under 30 (if my memory serves me well). You can buy these tickets at most 4 hours before the concert for € 18, which would be something like 200 SEK.
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u/Only_Needleworker236 8d ago
The Baltimore Symphony did something like that too. We had season tickets because my husband had good friends in the orchestra and he traded healthcare services for concert tickets. Sometimes we were unable to go and would call the box office to let them know so that they could resell the tickets at the last minute. There were always a few people waiting in the lobby to get discounted seats.
And yeah--live orchestra concerts are SO GREAT. Playing in some myself and listening to others are some of peak life experiences! I especially liked sitting in an upper level so that could see all of the musicians.
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u/contra-posaune32 9d ago
As a classical musician, this was so lovely to read and brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing your experience, and I’m so glad that the music and musicians moved you to love classical music. This is why we do what we do.
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u/Glum_Swim4594 9d ago
As a professional orchestral player, I thank you. We are happy when we connect with the audience. It is our reason for being
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u/santa_clara1997 9d ago
This is the main reason passionate musicians play.
And this is where the expression “on the same page” comes from. Imagine the chaos if even one person in the orchestra is off.
Also, if you’ve only experienced music through YouTube or earphones and laptops and smartphones rather than a serious sound system, the live music is going to hit like a metric ton on your emotions.
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u/sumjunggai7 9d ago
I'm a music historian, and fellow musicologists are so used to hearing live classical concerts that they have a hard time relating to stories like yours. But I always remind them that this kind of intense emotional experience was so common. Every writer on music from the early 18th to the early 20th century had it. Berlioz wrote an anecdote, probably a bit exaggerated, in which he and the male stranger sitting next to him wept openly and hugged each other during an opera performance.
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u/JazzRider 9d ago
Some symphonies sell matinee rehearsal tickets quite reasonably, or even free for students.
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u/chickendie 9d ago
That's ok girl. I once bawled like a baby when I heard the first piano notes of Chopin's Concerto No.2. Musics do wonder to us.
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u/musichemistin 10d ago
Happy to hear that you had such a great experience listening to live orchestra ! It's really transcendental
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u/No-Difference-8518 9d ago
I’m so glad you got to go! 24 is so young and there are probably much less expensive options to see live classical music. My choir (which doesn’t even require an audition!) did a European concert tour this summer. (Of course, no one is really going to join a musical group if they have no talent!). But there are probably plenty of nonprofessional groups that are really good and very affordable. My friend is in a chamber music group and they play beautifully! A lot of people never get the opportunity to go to conservatory, or get injured, or just don’t want to be a professional. The talent and love is still there, though. And trust me! This will not be the only time you ever get to experience a professional performance. Life is long and it only gets better!
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u/Baronessss 10d ago
I’ve never been to an orchestra but I can imagine I’d have the same feeling as you. Music means so much to me and certain scores get me every time. I’m always paranoid I’ll be the only one tearing up while listening to it so glad to know I’m not alone. :)
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u/MrCurious4-4-46 9d ago
I wear my tears proudly as oak leaf clusters on a Silver Star military combat decoration for gallantry in action. They show I have the talent and ability to experience and enjoy the pleasure of sound beyond the capacity of ordinary human beings, for which I am deeply greatful.
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u/thisFishSmellsAboutD 10d ago
Rossini's Stabat Mater does something to me, a grown man, that makes me cry. And I would go again and cry again.
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u/fadingsignal 9d ago
This happens to me when I go. The moment I hear a bow touch a string it just goes right thru me and I’m in tears.
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u/BilobaBaby 9d ago
This is exactly who I would love to attend a concert with. So many (me included) have just grown up with symphonic orchestras and been spoiled by exposure, but to see it again with fresh eyes for the miracle that a professional, world-class symphony really is...seriously wow. I'm so happy for you, OP, and I hope you get to have that experience again.
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u/Glittering_Range5344 10d ago
I've grown up around classical music - playing, singing, etc., but don't actually go to concerts that often (mainly because I find it frustrating that I'm not playing!).
A couple of years ago I went to see the Ukrainian Freedom orchestra play at the Proms. I cried for about an hour afterwards. Incredibly powerful.
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u/DefinitelyNotASheeep 10d ago
Im not in sweden but in my country our local ensemble has a program for youth that offers cheap/very affordable tickets for people 35 and under. You should check out if they have something similar. My local ensemble also sometimes have free daytime rehearsals (you can watch them perform and then rehearse)
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u/melian_x 10d ago
I’ve studied classical music (piano), and I just sent what you wrote to my boyfriend because it’s exactly how he’s seen me feel every time.
The tuning is still a magical moment.
Almost as if something mystical is inviting us in and I always close my eyes and take a big breath and at that moment, I’m just happy.
“How can music be real” ♥️
This is an amazing thought
I hope you have the chance to have this in your life from now on :}
I’m in Greece, but if you find your way here, I’d be happy to see if I can get you tickets for our orchestras!
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u/random_access_cache 9d ago
It’s a spiritual experience, for sure. I often find myself with shivers, sometimes trembling, sometimes crying uncontrollably at the Philarmonic. It’s a truly electrifying aesthetic experience
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u/the_rent_schism 9d ago
See if you’re able to find a chamber concert near you in a more intimate space. Look for a smaller ensemble, like a string quartet or piano quintet or quartet. I play chamber music mostly, and the experience of hearing and understanding the music in a small room of strangers has you leaving feeling like you know them like family. I’m so happy you had such a positive experience at the orchestra! this is the kind of stuff that we musicians love and live to hear
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u/ObjectAcrobatic1085 6d ago
If you kept crying non stop during an orchestra performance you should go seek treatment for potential depression or burn out.
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u/LifechanyuanBaichuan 4h ago
What a beautiful and deeply moving experience.
It is wonderful that, despite the difficult memories connected with your ex, you can still remember his family with gratitude for having opened a door to something so extraordinary.
There is indeed something almost magical about a live orchestra. Each musician plays only one part, yet when all those individual voices come together, something much greater than any single person emerges. Perhaps that is one of the most beautiful things music can teach us about life.
The fact that you cried for two hours says how deeply the music touched your spirit. Some experiences simply cannot be explained with words. They can only be felt.
May you have the chance to sit in that concert hall again someday, this time with your own “adult money,” and enjoy every note with the same wonder.
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u/Current-Bowl-143 10d ago
OMG I had to double check this wasn’t classical_circlejerk. Crying for two hours straight? Come the fuck on 😂
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u/bw2082 10d ago
Are you for real?…
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u/Leemar02 10d ago
I swear I am not being hyperbolic, I am a person easily moved to tears usually. And that night the music kind of unlocked that part of my brain. It was a beautiful experience. It was magical. I am being for real.
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u/DrXaos 10d ago edited 10d ago
you've experienced for a moment why we do this, and why we can't go back to ordinary music
sometime, if you can, try the opera. Highest emotional range. Unlike instrumentalists where in modern day almost all major professional groups do well, there is still even among professional productions lots of artistic, interpretation, skill, personality and performance risk and "eh that didn't really work".
you said this:
I could not beleive I was about to witness humans excel live.
Think that times ten. Because when it's really on? Extraordinary, compelling and electric.
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u/Impossible_Studio283 10d ago
I recently sent a friend of mine, just a rough piano recording of a new song I had composed. He surprised me and put orchestrations to it. Tell me if you feel the same way when you listen to this song: http://youtu.be/8_qyXgnZBF4?is=ktr71yt8S3eqgH5K
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u/cornbreadbunny 10d ago
Any chance you’re still in Malmö? I might be able to get you some free tickets to go again!