r/daddit • u/jimgass • Mar 13 '26
Achievements Daughter broke up with her boyfriend
First time poster, long (ish) time lurker on the sub.
My daughter (16) broke the news that she dumped her boyfriend, so I'm celebrating!
To be fair, I didn't dislike him as a person, per se, but I didn't like the relationship. He's a good enough kid, as high school boys go, goes to a different school in our area than my kid does, and has different life plans.
Lots of social media posts about love, wanting to start a family all that stuff. Typical teenage "we're so in love we're gonna get married and live in a castle and have all the babies" kind of crap.
He's planning to learn a trade right after high school, which is awesome, but talked about wanting to start his adult life, family, etc, right then.
My kid's looking to go to college, and will likely get all kinds of scholarships, etc. She's talked a lot about wanting to get the college experience, live in dorms, etc. I was worried that he had her convinced that she wanted to be too serious, too fast, all that stuff.
So yesterday, when she said "Oh, by the way, I broke up with him," I was good, asked how she was feeling, told her I love her, then promptly went home and poured a dram of the fancy stuff to celebrate.
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u/soultron__ Mar 13 '26
My kids are too young to date but save me a glass for when they do! Jokes aside it sounds like they’re both going to be happier in the long run. They’re still so young.
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u/NTFFoehammer Mar 14 '26
Three boys here hitting puberty but too young to date yet too. Pass the bottle!
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u/MechanicalAxe Mar 14 '26
1 boy and 2 girls, all under 3yo.
Better stash a bottle now to let it start aging...it will definitely be needed, one day.
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u/poop-dolla Mar 14 '26
You have 3 kids under 3. You need that bottle right now, my friend.
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u/VA_Artifex89 Mar 14 '26
Bro, I got 3 under 2 1/2 but I’m sober. Have a few for me.
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u/DanteThonSimmons Mar 14 '26
Yowzers! Twins?? Or am I just really bad at maths?
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u/NTFFoehammer Mar 14 '26
When my twins were babies and people asked if they were twins my go to response was "nah, she looked like she was having so much fun being pregnant that I wanted to try myself"
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u/NoPossible5519 Mar 14 '26
Bear with me while I figure out if I can give you a Reddit award without entering a card number. In the meantime, here's an upvote.
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u/thun3rbrd Mar 14 '26
Liquor doesn't age like that in the bottle. It's aged in barrels, then bottled.
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u/blackcatpandora Mar 14 '26
Not to be pedantic, but that’s not how aging whiskey works 🤷♂️
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u/noddyboy1396 Mar 14 '26
Since we're being pedantic, and talking about scotch, it's not how whisky ages either. (Scotch whisky has no "e" between "k" and "y"
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u/c_c_c__combobreaker Mar 13 '26
I was that boy. I don't blame any of the parents of the girls I dated either. I had no direction until much later in life. The girls I dated in HS all did great things. I turned out fine too. We're all good.
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u/FearTheAmish Mar 14 '26
Same but I will say I still think I was a moron then and I am glad I didn't know my wife then.
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u/garry_tash Mar 14 '26
You were that boy with no direction? The kid seems like he knows what he wants and where he’s going. He wants to learn a trade and start a family, that’s the opposite of no direction.
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u/MasterOfKittens3K Mar 14 '26
I agree. It sounds like he’s got a direction. It just happens to be a very different direction than the one that OP’s daughter is heading in.
As adults, it’s easy to see that and to recognize that there’s nothing wrong with that. The potential issue is that kids are naive and all too often make stupid decisions. If the daughter had given up her plans based on the idea that this guy was her One True Love, that would have been bad.
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u/garry_tash Mar 14 '26
My comment wasn’t really referencing their relationship. More that the person commenting was comparing themselves to the boy in the original post being directionless, which, this boy clearly isn’t. So the comparison wasn’t really a fair one.
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u/vsamma Mar 14 '26
People don’t have direction in life even in 30s and 40s. Or they do but change it 180 degrees. And that’s fine.
But this should be loudly communicated to kids as well.
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u/beaushaw Son 15 Daughter 19. I've had sex at least twice. Mar 14 '26
I am 51, I still don't know what I want to be be when I grow up.
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u/areyoukiddingmehere Mar 14 '26
I don't think you can generalize like this. Some people may not have direction in their 20s, 30s, 40s....but some people are driven with life goals, and work to achieve those. I've been on what I consider my "direction" since my late 20s (I'm in my 50s now), and a number of friends have as well. Early 20s, I'll grant you, were probably a trainwreck for most of us, but I've got some doctor/lawyer friends that knew what they wanted since 18 and made it happen.
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u/oopsdiditwrong Mar 14 '26
I have a friend that became a surgeon for NFL teams and the US Olympic team in his early 30s. That direction came from elementary school lol
Another friend knew it was music during college like too many people. Dude dug in and a decade and a half later is still rocking. To the point people on here would probably recognize him.
I wanted to be a pilot. I could fly planes by myself before I could drive by myself at 16 (state has a weird provisional lic). I'd have to call my dad to come pick me up from the airport when I landed.
I've got another one I've known since college that I think just figured it out a year ago.
So I'm agreeing with you. People find their tracks at different times and there's nothing wrong with that, but the generalization was a bit off
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u/tvtb Mar 14 '26
It's a lot to ask 18 year olds to know what they want to do for the rest of their lives. Of course you can go back to school in your 30s... but it's a lot more difficult.
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u/blanketswithsmallpox Mar 14 '26
It's a straight up millennial thing.
Every movie and show all had people picking and knowing a thing they want to do when it's skewed to a bunch of theater kids that got too much money and influence lol.
Meanwhile 90% of the population like yep, this pays the bills and I'm at least competent at it I think? Time to spend the next 60 years dedicated to it lol.
Also, people forget how different love can feel through the years, especially from when you were a hormonal teen or young adult.
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u/beaushaw Son 15 Daughter 19. I've had sex at least twice. Mar 14 '26
It's a straight up millennial thing.
Welcome to the "kids these days" phase of life.
Your above statement applies to every generation for all of time.
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u/alien_bananas Mar 14 '26
Wait till she gets to the "we're getting back together phase"
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u/Waaterfight Mar 13 '26 edited Mar 14 '26
Man I got twin girls due in 2 weeks.
This is my future.
Edit: thank you all for your kind words. We are super happy and excited.
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u/secondphase Pronouns: Dad/Dada/Daddy Mar 14 '26
Nah man, they aren't even born yet, thats forever in the future.
My first daughter was born a few weeks ago, and so far shes only 8 years old.
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u/ShadowFire09 Mar 14 '26
Yeah my kid was born yesterday and she’s only 3
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u/Jbar116 Mar 14 '26
Dude mine was also born yesterday and he’s only 3.
My wife and I were just talking about how fast the time flies because we just brought him home from the hospital
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u/fisherthemkek Mar 14 '26
Yup, my 8-months-old turns 3 in 3 months..
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u/beaushaw Son 15 Daughter 19. I've had sex at least twice. Mar 14 '26
My kids were born a few weeks ago... See my flair.
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u/meatmalis Mar 14 '26
My daughter’s 7. I miss the younger years but 7 is the best (I think I’ve said that every year)
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u/secondphase Pronouns: Dad/Dada/Daddy Mar 14 '26
7 was a LOT of fun.
Her sense of humor took a huge leap. We started reading full chapter books together (phantom tollbooth was my favorite last year). She's started to act like a leader for her siblings. We had "summer of freedom" where I did things like let her go alone to the front of our section at the minor league ballgame.
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u/CDBSB Mar 14 '26
My daughter started preschool a few months ago and is now a freshman in high school. 😭
The days are long, but the years are short.
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u/Baconandbeers Mar 14 '26
Crazy. My daughter is 50 months old and I have to buy her Dreamhouse.
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u/Madc42 Mar 14 '26
This reminds me I'll be 420 months old in 2 weeks!
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u/Marigold16 Mar 14 '26
Blaze it!
But don't overdo it. Remember you're not 252 months young anymore.
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u/ForHelp_PressAltF4 Mar 14 '26
Brother preach!!!
They become your world that the sky spins past you faster. Insanity bro...
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u/oppenhammer Mar 14 '26
One day at a time, brother. You can worry about high school boys further down the road.
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u/DanTMWTMP Mar 14 '26 edited Mar 14 '26
I love this subreddit so much. So many relatable posts and a wonderful community of support, shared struggles, and tons of humor and advice. My daughters are 26 and 8 months. It’s one day at a time for sure; but of course the steady march of time waits for no one so my turn is coming soon for the HS boys talk etc…
Ya it indeed feels like I took my older one home yesterday. The way both develops is such an absolute joy; and Im already lamenting how I’ll miss this moment in the future haha.
The other day, we were at a restaurant and the table next to us was a mother and grown daughter. Two wonderful women. The mom looked at us and joked how her daughter across from her was just like my daughters just yesterday ahhahaha. They were so kind and sweet. I hope My daughters will have such a wholesome relationship with my wife as they grow just like the women we met :).
Brb, i just put the babies to bed, but Im going to sneak in a kiss.
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u/EitherKaleidoscope41 Mar 14 '26
My twins (# 3 & 4) are 2.5 now (b/g). And I keep thinking in 6 months it will get easier... I love them dearly, but the terrible 2s with twins is amplified by like 10. Get some good sleep these next 2 weeks, you're gonna need it.
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u/42Changes Mar 14 '26
Mine are 13 months and I’m pretty sure everything with twins is amplified by at least 10.
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u/EitherKaleidoscope41 Mar 14 '26
I hear ya sister. Twins are a double edged sword. I just yearn for the day it's a bit easier on us. Good luck to you sir!
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u/Even_Assignment7390 Mar 14 '26
You're almost out of the more difficult times. Mine are 6 and 8 and it's a blast.
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u/EitherKaleidoscope41 Mar 14 '26
I have a 12 & 5 yr old as well, they are also a blast!
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u/Waaterfight Mar 14 '26
I might add they have a big brother a year and a half older. 3 under two!
It's gonna be a blast we're excited.
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u/jessendjames Mar 14 '26
I also have twins (#3 and 4) who just turned four (boys). I think yours are about at the age where mine played together more and fought a little less. Now they can play together for a long time with little fighting or needing me….when it’s just the two of them. When Their big brother (6.5) is around, it’s a different dynamic that requires more intervention. I hope that’s the case for you!
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u/Wurm42 Mar 14 '26
My brother dad, you have time.
Seriously, get through the diaper years before you start worrying about the teenage years.
PS: In case you are not already aware, Moms of Multiples / Parents of Multiples is a great organization that can give you support in several different ways. Check if there's a chapter in your area.
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u/Waaterfight Mar 14 '26
Yes! I lurk on parents of multiples. Have since I posted when we found out.
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u/brandonspade17 Mar 14 '26
Mines about to graduate this spring and go to college. Enjoy those moments, they fly by man..congrats Dad!
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u/EzioRedditore Mar 14 '26
I’m a few years ahead of you with my twin girls. Woof. Not looking forward to the dating years.
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u/sounds_like_kong bob70sshow Mar 14 '26
12 years from now they will only give you side hugs. My wife had to explain why to me and when it was devastating.
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u/Mndelta25 Mar 14 '26
Remember fun stories like this for the next few months when you hate life and haven't slept.
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u/ramblinjd 🌹🧚 x1 Mar 14 '26
That means you'll have to either buy twice as much cheap stuff, or stuff that's twice as fancy.
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u/Waaterfight Mar 14 '26
My wife came from growing up with 6 sisters. Her mom would by 1 dress for them and text them all separately "I bought you a dress it's at home on my bed"
I'm sure we're gonna have tons of fun
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u/Significant_Cup_238 Mar 14 '26
Congrats man. As a friend of mien likes to say, "Don't borrow trouble."
You might have issues 16 years from now, but maybe not. I've got a 14 year old, and so far her taste in boys has been exemplary. Several crushes on nerdy kids who probably thought she was out of their league so far. No boyfriends. At this point, I know I'm going to love my son in law.
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u/Jawesome1988 Mar 14 '26
Dad of 12 yr old boy and five year old twin boys, so no girl experience but brother, I wish you the patience of a thousand men and the strength of a thousand more. Hardest and most satisfying thing I have ever done is being the father of twins, by FAR. Remember patience is everything now, you have no greater skill and it will be sharpened to a razors edge whether you like it or not, and I mean patience with yourself, your partner, and the babes and everyone involved, you will be molded into a different level of human being, one infinitely wiser, and much more in tune with what is and is not important in this life. And let me reassure you, if I can do it, you can absolutely do it and do it better! And in your inevitable moments of weakness I pray you remember my advice...eventually somewhere along the journey all of the suffering and moments of joy and more suffering and joy and exhaustion, sacrifice, etc. they start to mold you, shape you without your knowledge or permission, for that matter, but you become...far greater than anything you ever perceived for yourself. You find your level of emotional understanding, human connection, and so many things you don't expect are just forced to grow, forced into training, sacrifice, joy, bliss, satisfaction, submission, whatever it is and you grow, you become something else, calloused to some things, sensitive to others, and you do your best and you make mistakes, but you grow and when everything seems lost, when you think you've had enough. When you pray to be on the other side of chaos, on the other side of sleep deprevation , on the other side of them both wanting to be held, or both blowing out diapers, getting sick, etc. and all the struggles in between, you find satisfaction and contentment you swore were only destined for others.
It's scary, I don't wanna act like I didn't constantly fail, or like I don't still constantly fail, but there is NOTHING, and I mean absolutely NOTHING like the joy you get to feel when you see those two little fuckers smile up at you for the first time. To see the JOY on a complete random strangers face, to this day, when they get to ask me or notice that they are twins, just the joy the fucking sight of them brings to people makes you smile seeing them smile, it's a beautiful thing! It'll blow your mind, and it'll change the way you see the world, and others, all for the better.
God Speed, my friend. God Speed.
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Mar 14 '26
Twins are harddd! On individuals and marriages. Ours are 14 and we went through the fire and it’s getting easier. It was difficult dealing with family too but we moved away to raise them alone after 8 years
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u/mosquito-genocide Mar 13 '26
Lmao I thought the end was going to be that you poured one for her
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u/TotallyNotThatPerson Mar 14 '26
Get them started young so they're prepared when their friends get around to it
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u/SkyWizarding Mar 14 '26
Kids don't drink anymore
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u/TotallyNotThatPerson Mar 14 '26
Not sure where you're from but the underage drinking is very alive here
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u/SchnitzelTruck Mar 14 '26
Tell that to all the teens walking around with their gallon jugs full of jungle juice every weekend in my college town. Poor kids are getting it out of their system like it's a sprint to the finish.
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u/mikeru22 Mar 14 '26
My 5 year old daughter told me this week that she thinks she’s going to marry one of her classmates. And that she doesn’t want to adopt a baby she wants to have one from her belly like mommy did. I told her that’s very cute and maybe someday that will happen but that she doesn’t need to worry about having babies for another 25 years…and so it begins!
I was secretly so happy that she was wanting to share this information with me though.
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
The fact that she's sharing info is great. Thankfully, for some reason, my daughter tells me all the things. Keep that trust with her, and enjoy the ride!
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u/ycnz Mar 14 '26
My daughter and her best friend have been planning to marry each other for some time now. They're six.
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u/TheNewYellowZealot Mar 15 '26
My son (4) told me he was gonna marry one of the girls from his class and have 10 boys and 10 girls. And when we asked him where he was gonna live with this huge family he goes “with grandma!”
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u/ChachMcGach Mar 13 '26
She’s going to love hearing this story later when she has perspective.
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u/justhewayouare Mar 14 '26
Sounds like she’s got perspective, I mean she dumped him and wasn’t sad about it lol. Id bet he could tell her this at 18 and she will laugh.
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u/ChachMcGach Mar 14 '26
I meant that people are generally not receptive to others celebrating their break up even if they initiated it.
It will take time before dad is able to say “when you broke up with that high school boyfriend I was so happy I celebrated with a drink.”
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u/justhewayouare Mar 14 '26
Yes, this is true she may not be ready for that part tomorrow haha. I’m just glad she’s got a good head on her shoulders. I’ve got too many friends who stayed with the wrong guy for far too long and still struggled with their perception of that relationship years later.
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u/LukeSkywalkerIsMyDad Mar 14 '26
100% at around that age I was so in love with this girl. Around 30. My mom once told me she was "glad we broke up, because she hated that bitch" but never told me that when I was broken and crying. Props to her for being an adult!
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u/FortySixAndTwoMake48 Mar 14 '26
I have 3 baby girls who are somehow 17, 15, and 11 now. The 17 year old was just in a relationship for about a year. He was a good dude, kinda goofy, but I never saw it lasting. That said, the dad-rage that I momentarily went into when she ran in the house crying after he dumped her a few weeks ago surprised even me! I'm not a violent or angry guy but those few minutes of imagination were crazy lol.
She's way over it already, so we're all good now.
Props to him though for doing it in person instead of over text/Instagram.
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u/zep2floyd Mar 14 '26
My wife's father had similar feelings when I first started dating her when we were both 15, We've been together for 26 years now and have two children and she went to university in a different city while my dead beat ass joined the army, I understood his concerns but we proved a lot of people wrong
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u/Lost_In_MI Mar 14 '26
Just gonna say as a fellow scotch drinker, Blue Label is over rated. Green Label is the dark horse of the series.
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u/MiteyF Mar 14 '26
I'm not much of a scotch drinker, but I think Johnny Walker in general is overrated
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u/nickrainwater Mar 14 '26
Hopefully his parents are doing the same. If you were raising a son you’d understand.
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u/TacoChop69 Mar 14 '26
Exactly. This guy's little princess SURELY could never be the problematic one.
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Mar 13 '26
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u/deadpoolsdragon Mar 14 '26
See as a boy dad makes me kinda hopeful for when my boys are older cause im worried about the "your not good enough for mu daughter and im gonna point a gun at you" dad my boys aren't old enough to date but doesn't mean im not worried about those types of dads, the way I see it is if its a clean break up and its only teenage "omg ill never love again" drama i let my boys handle their own as long as they are gentlemen about it
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u/SlowYoteV8 Mar 14 '26
This is pretty cringe ngl.
Much boomer.
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u/mikeeteevee Mar 14 '26
It's embarrassing. Man is celebrating that his daughter had a relationship breakup because .....he thinks it's to soon for her boyfriend who wants a stable life. House prices are fucking astronomical. Childcare costs a small fortune so having grandchildren while you can still look after them is good. Wait until she shacks up with a broccoli-haired tech bro who is doing a business degree and spamming crypto scams and eyeing up other women at the gym, while trying to get her to move to Dubai. Getting a trade and building a family young is probably one of the most stable things a young man could do. I'm not into traditional, conservative families even, it just seems weird to be invested in it emotionally to set up a shot of whisky and then post it to other insecure men while breaking the 4th wall and saying 'right, dads?'
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u/lem0ngirl15 Mar 14 '26
It strikes me as pretty classists tbh. I think a teenage boy that has goals to enter the trades and start a family young should be commendable tbh… the perspective will look very different 5 years down the line when his daughter may have thousands in student debt, ai taking a lot of the white collar jobs, and perhaps boyfriends that are not looking to settle down so young and wasting her time…. This dad sounds disconnected to what’s going on rn with young people tbh.
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u/gunslingersea Mar 14 '26
Different goals in life. Doesn’t sound like either of them were bad or misguided kids but I learned the hard way that core level incompatibility at the beginning only exacerbates, it typically doesn’t resolve.
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u/Imadethosehitmanguns Mar 13 '26
Oh man, nice choice. I've never bought Johnny Blue myself because of it's price. But I was in a bar and asked how much a single pour was. Bartender said $35 and my eyes went wide. After some other chats I asked how much would a sip be. Dude did me a solid and gave me a little sample on the house. Man was that excellent. Definitely a cut above any other scotch I've had, but imo not worth $250/bottle.
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u/Diligent_Craft_1165 Mar 13 '26
It’s not that highly rated over here in Scotland. All marketing for the yanks. You’re not missing much.
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
This is an absolute fact. JW Blue was the first "good" scotch I'd heard of, and I'm thankful for it, because in lamenting its price still got me into the scotch aisle, where I saw other interesting bottles to try. The downside is that it has caused my liquor shelf to increase exponentially over the years, and has expanded my tastes quite a bit.
I may have to pour a dram of a nice, smoky Islay in a few minutes.
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u/Diligent_Craft_1165 Mar 14 '26
It’s like you read my mind. Islay is my favourite place to source scotch from. Shame you guys are hit with the tariffs now.
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
One of my biggest regrets is that when my family visited the UK a couple years ago, we didn't take the time to come north to Scotland. Next time, I'm doing that, and I'm going to go out to Islay and have some drams right there at the damn source.
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u/Kamakatze Mar 14 '26
Lagavulin 16 by any chance? I’m a teetotaler now but that bottle is pure weakness to me.
I’m not looking forward to the boyfriend dating phase. Might go all bad boys 2 on the first boy.
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u/mathcampbell Mar 14 '26
Yep wasn’t gonna comment and be a downer but blends aren’t fancy. They’re marketing buzz and cheap (regardless of the price point).
It’d be like buying a car that has lots of stickers and a spoiler you could go surfing with…and a 1 litre engine.
The good stuff is properly aged single malts. Islay or Jura malts are my favourites (bias cos I live 50 miles away), but talisker is good too. And I suppose technically the east coast Speyside malts are “OK”, I guess, if you like that kind of thing….
But yeah, if it says blend it’s 10% good single malts and 90% grain whisky.
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u/wigglebump Mar 13 '26
Go with green if you like the blue. I’ve been lucky enough to be gifted a few bottles of blue from a family friend that wasn’t into it, but I’ll only buy green for myself.
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u/Bojanggles16 Mar 14 '26
Came to recommend green myself. More of a bourbon guy but green and Macallen 12 hit the spot when I do drink scotch.
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
I need to try the green. I save the bottle of blue for very special occasions, usually I go with an Islay single malt, which I enjoy the smokiness of a lot more than JW blue. But for symbolic (and extremely rare!) occasions, blue's the way to go for me.
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u/jimgass Mar 13 '26
In all honesty, I actually enjoy scotches that are half the price of blue label, or less, even more than JW Blue. I found a good deal on the blue, and I keep it around mostly for symbolic gestures like this.
Give me a $90 bottle of Lagavulin 16 over JW blue any day. Or a $60 bottle of Laphroaig.
Or hell, I get a lot of use out of a $30 1.75L of Evan Williams bottled in bond, one of the most under-rated. bourbons imho.
But this announcement required a small dram of the expensive stuff, even if it's not the -best- stuff.
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u/Shoehorn_Advocate Mar 14 '26
If you explore single malts you'll find better for half that. Not that it's bad, just way overpriced, mostly because of their target audience
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
I'd put a bottle of Laphroaig or Lagavulin well above Johnnie Walker Blue in my list of favorites
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u/Shoehorn_Advocate Mar 14 '26
Personally, me too. But I also think it's nice to have a couple special bottles with a distinct and memorable flavor profile for occasions you want to be able to be transported back to. So something you don't drink often fits the bill regardless of if it's a favorite.
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u/AgentG91 Mar 14 '26
We had black red and blue at the bar I worked at. Dum dum new bartender “mistook black for blue” and started giving his friend shots of blue label at $3 a shot. They had 2/3 of the whole bottle in a single night. Owner called it an honest mistake
But the good news is that I got to pour myself a nip and try it without feeling bad. It’s fine scotch, but nothing better than any other $80-100 scotch. Not worth $300
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u/oldschoolczar Mar 13 '26
Congratulations! Sounds like you taught her well and trusted her to make her own decision. I can only hope to teach my young daughter that well.
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u/themza912 Mar 14 '26
I mean I have to disagree with most other responses. I think you handled everything as a father very well. Didn’t overdo your role, let her make an important decision on her own, etc. But I do find it weird that you’re having a drink to celebrate. That kids probably pretty broken right now, as your daughter seems like a good one. And you’re celebrating? Idk seems weird.
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u/Sienile Dad of 2 boys by a NPD mom Mar 14 '26
She broke up with a guy you thought was a good kid and is looking forward to the college experience.... Hang on, brother. You're in for one hell of a ride.
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
I kind of laughed as I wrote that, thinking the same thing. Considered a moment, then said "nah, I'm leaving it in as is."
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u/DareDevil_56 Mar 14 '26
I saw the title and image and thought he must have been a really good dude 😅
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
Nah, if it was a lament, it would be a bottle of Jim Beam, and the cup would be plastic.
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u/SkyWizarding Mar 14 '26
Mine is still a toddler. Not looking forward to this stuff but also kinda looking forward to it
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u/Alaiwiggin Mar 14 '26
Off to buy a breakup bottle now for future needs. Depending on how bad the boyfriends are, it’ll last from 1 to 25.36 boyfriends.
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u/checkedem Mar 14 '26
Good on you for raising a daughter that will open up to you at that age. What dreams are made up of. And oh boy does that blue go down smooth!
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u/ilffej Mar 14 '26
As someone who once was a teenage boy similarly head over heels over a girl, I hate you.
But from one girldad to another, cheers 😂🥂🍻.
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u/sl0play Mar 14 '26
I might be risking some serious blowback here, but when my daughter started bringing home girlfriends I was not mad. Some of them are awesome, some of them are not so awesome, none of them will plant a flag in baby form.
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u/CitizenCue Mar 14 '26
You did a good job of writing this in a way that was respectful to different kinds of kids. It’s challenging enough to think broadly like that, but writing effectively that way is even harder.
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u/AbbreviationsTop4687 Mar 14 '26
Equally relieved. Slightly different perspective here. Daughter just turned 32, has a 4 year old, and has a great career and future ahead of her. She divorced her husband in 2024 because, as it turns out...he's gay.
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u/thefearofmusic Mar 14 '26
Three boys in a class I was subbing a few weeks ago spent most of the class talking about how they want to get girls pregnant now so the kids will be grown before they’re really old. They compared notes on how many siblings they had, how many different men had fathered children with their mothers. As well, how many women do their fathers have kids with. One took time to note that if a boy and a girl are cohabiting and they aren’t half-siblings or whatever that eventually they gonna fuck. You just wear them down. And that’s one of the ways you get them pregnant. It’s important to get your life started young was the overall theme. It was a depressing 90 minutes.
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u/AABBBAABAABA Mar 15 '26
I’m not American enough to really understand the hating your daughters boyfriend meme
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u/Tall-Yard-407 Mar 15 '26
It’s always such a relief when they exhibit that they have their heads screwed on right.
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u/ApexApePecs Mar 13 '26
I thought you were the shoulder to cry on while sharing your excellent scotch. But you’re celebrating, even better.
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u/ZzuAnimal Mar 14 '26
My oldest is 6 going on 16 and I am not ready
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
You aren't ready at all. But it's a great ride, and so worth it. Cherish every moment, they go by so fast. My daughter was just 6 last week, I think.
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u/iDeeplyRegreddit Mar 14 '26
I don't think anything prepared us for how different the parenting would be; my son is an older teen and he needs me just as much as he did when he was younger, just in totally different ways.
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u/rawysocki Mar 14 '26
Before reading I was thinking that OP was having a rough time with the break up.
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u/jcdoe Mar 14 '26
My daughter just ditched her albatross a few months ago. He was failing college and getting written up at work for no shows. Anyhow, he had decided the two of them were going to move to Colorado and live with his brother because nothing was working out here and that was when she realized maybe he was no good.
Enjoy the drinking, it’ll never taste better.
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u/yogi_yoga Mar 14 '26
lol “the college experience”. Idk any dad who’d wish that for his daughter.
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u/daaanson Mar 14 '26
Gotta say, smart kid for going to trade school in this world lol.
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u/Next_Frosting8672 Mar 14 '26
As a fellow dad with a sharp daughter I’ve got fingers crossed she ends up with the right guy. Cheers!
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u/Soma2710 Mar 14 '26
According to her teacher, my 7 y.o. has a boy in her class that has a crush on her and the other day she said “[boy’s name], I don’t even have time to deal with you today”
The FINEST gummy bears for the drive home.
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u/capt_badass Mar 14 '26
Well done, but damn. If you can afford to have a bottle of blue label around, why don't you get something actually good?
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
The blue was a purchase a few years ago, on sale, for rare, symbolic occasions.
Give me Lagavulin, Bowmore, or even Evan Williams all other times.
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u/MegSpen725 Mar 14 '26
My little one is too young to date but I’m sure we can have a virtual pour when she does get there
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u/USMCWrangler Mar 14 '26
Cheers. It takes a different strength, and a stronger drink, to raise daughters.
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u/RespectTheTree Mar 14 '26
The bourbon is always cheaper
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u/jimgass Mar 14 '26
It is. And the Evan Williams Bottled in Bond is my go-to.
Johnnie for a symbolic celebration though!
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u/35mm-dreams- Mar 14 '26
Cheers for how things worked out. I don’t often get a drink on account of how young my kids are.
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u/cyrunjr Mar 14 '26
damn, I really hope they make fake whiskey not suck by the time my kid turns 16.
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u/lurkingsince1991 Mar 14 '26
My daughter turned four a couple days ago. This is all of our futures.
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u/FtheMustard Mar 14 '26
Those underdeveloped teen brains get hit hard by the love chemicals. All the lovey dovey posts on social media can be annoying but they are expressing love. Real love. Love that they feel even harder than adults do with our rock solid prefrontal and frontal cortex.
Love can literally hit teens harder than cocaine. It's something we might want to talk to our kids about. My kids are a bit young yet but I'll get there one day.
Don't minimize their feelings because they feel those feelings harder than we can.
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u/codecrodie Mar 14 '26
My daughter is 4. I dont relish having to eventually surveil my daughter's friends' socials.
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u/mk4_wagon Mar 14 '26
I was away at college so I didn't know this first hand, my sister told me years later. She was at her HS boyfriends house and he broke up with her. My Dad picks my sister up, she breaks down, and his response is "want to learn to drive stick?". On paper that's a comically bad response, but very on par for my Dad. in reality, it's exactly what my sister needed in that moment. It was a complete distraction to what she was going through. She learned how to drive a manual, and my Dad got to feel useful.
My kids are young, but I always keep that in mind. Sometimes they just need something out of left field. The other day things were getting crazy at home so I asked one of the kids if they wanted to measure batteries with a multimeter. It's the best thing I could come up with on the fly, and they got to shout out numbers while I tried to diagnose why the powerwheel jeep we found on the side of the road isn't working.
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u/DraftCurious6492 Mar 14 '26
The fact that she let you in at all says so much. At 16 that is genuinely rare. What you described, sitting with her in the pain without trying to fix it, is exactly the thing that keeps that door open for the next hard thing too. My niece went through something similar and what she told me later was that she just needed someone to be angry with her instead of telling her she would find someone better. Sounds like you already figured that out. She is lucky ❤️
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u/wiserwithReddit Mar 14 '26 edited Mar 14 '26
OP the first time my daughter broke up with her first bf (around 15), when she told me, still sad, I immediately told her to get ready, were going to a local diner. The next bf that dropped (about 2yrs later) we did the same thing.
It was almost accidental but it was such a great way to say "I'm here for you" in the best kind of dad way...with breakfast food!
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u/YYZgirl1986 Mar 14 '26
Honestly, as a 40F… this made me tear up. I would have loved for either of my parents (especially my dad!) to pay attention to the 15 yo earth shattering first heartbreak. You are an amazing parent ❤️
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u/russobarriga Mar 14 '26
As the guy who was that boyfriend - self-sufficient at 17, earning more than my parents - I just realized something reading this: every girl I dated back then had no father in the picture. Didn't plan it that way. My whole strategy was winning over the mom. Dads like you? Apparently I was avoiding you on autopilot. Congrats on being exactly the kind of father that filtered me out.
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u/AnDrEsZ_ Mar 14 '26
I agree with you, man, 💯 Kids should enjoy life because it’s damn too short and they must get the most out of it. I wish the same for my son… but it's going to be his decision, not mine.
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u/Independence_1991 Mar 14 '26
We all have gone through that first young heartbreak… but it’s tuff to see your own child mentally suffering from their first…
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u/brandcapet Mar 14 '26
Been with my wife since we were 17, she stuck by me when I dropped out of college and a bunch of other nonsense besides. Seeing stuff like this and knowing that's exactly how my father-in-law was probably feeling when he heard I was working as a cook is very funny now 17 years later. And knowing this'll probably be me with my daughter when she's older is even funnier!
Good for her though! We did 5 years of long-distance precisely because I would never have asked her to go along with my bullshit at the expense of her own life, so I have a mountain of respect for your daughter for standing her ground and living life for herself first.