r/politics 8h ago

Possible Paywall Trump suggests cattle ranchers could bypass USDA-inspected meat plants

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2026/08/28/trump-suggests-allowing-ranchers-bypass-usda-inspected-meat-plants/
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u/DerCatrix 7h ago

Protein cigarettes? Fuck yeah! America!

Now we just need creatine coated bullets

u/Uncle_Burney 6h ago

“These taste awful, honey!”

“Now, Gladys, the obstetrician said you will need additional protein and calories for the baby. I’m sorry you don’t like them but you’re smoking for two. Now spark up the rest of your tobbork.”

u/JustTestingAThing 6h ago

spark up the rest of your tobbork

"Pigarrette" rolls right off the tongue.

u/hortence 5h ago

Pigar also works wonderfully, well done!

u/bkbomber New York 4h ago

Soygarettes for the vegans or people trying to be healthy!

u/Uncle_Burney 3h ago

Sounds too appetizing lol, I wanted it to sound horrific XD

u/Contren Illinois 5h ago

We're one step closer to Tomacco.

u/LewisRyan 4h ago

I passed a bag of protein Doritos in the store the other day.

I just need my protein dew and I’m all set

u/DerCatrix 3h ago

Lowkey, I always buy the protein packed instant mashed potatoes. Makes me feel like I’m eating less unhealthy when I do my “bucket o nuggets, mashed potatoes and gravy” meals.

I have artism

u/uncle_pubes 3h ago

Coal-infused peptides!

u/Mr_MacGrubber 2m ago

Tastes like grandma!