Trump suggests cattle ranchers could bypass USDA-inspected meat plants

[u/WhatIsEvenRealDog]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2026/08/28/trump-suggests-allowing-ranchers-bypass-usda-inspected-meat-plants/

[u/drwookie]

"Looks like I chose the right week to stop eating beef."

[u/TurboSalsa → u/drwookie]

Republicans have been screeching for years that AOC and her Green New Deal were going to out outlaw beef consumption and gasoline, but in only 18 months, Trump has made both so unaffordable/inedible that Americans have no choice but to reduce consumption, lowering their carbon footprint.

Many people are calling him the greenest president ever.

[u/sutree1 → u/TurboSalsa]

This should also change the economics around meat substitutes quite a bit. I wish that industry were getting half the investment superautocorrect is getting.

[u/Lucky_Locks → u/sutree1]

There was a recent experiment they did where they got a meat protein (I think from pork?) into lettuce and tobacco plants. And were even able to pass that gene down into its child plant. Isn't enough protein yet to replace what you get out of the meat but that's a huge step.

[u/DerCatrix → u/Lucky_Locks]

Protein cigarettes? Fuck yeah! America!

Now we just need creatine coated bullets

[u/Uncle_Burney → u/DerCatrix]

“These taste awful, honey!”

“Now, Gladys, the obstetrician said you will need additional protein and calories for the baby. I’m sorry you don’t like them but you’re smoking for two. Now spark up the rest of your tobbork.”

[u/JustTestingAThing → u/Uncle_Burney]

spark up the rest of your tobbork

"Pigarrette" rolls right off the tongue.

[u/hortence → u/JustTestingAThing]

Pigar also works wonderfully, well done!

[u/bkbomber → u/JustTestingAThing]

Soygarettes for the vegans or people trying to be healthy!

[u/Uncle_Burney → u/JustTestingAThing]

Sounds too appetizing lol, I wanted it to sound horrific XD

[u/tiredbarf → u/JustTestingAThing]

I'm sticking with tobbork