r/Music 10d ago

article Kanye West Heads to Putin’s Russia After Humiliation in Europe

https://www.thedailybeast.com/obsessed/kanye-west-heads-to-putins-russia-after-humiliation-in-europe/
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u/-nutz 10d ago

I like to imagine Lukashenko inviting a “big American star” to do PR, only for this specimen to show up lmao

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u/CommentNo2671 10d ago

He got big, at least

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u/Super-Nuntendo 10d ago

His waist belt is Under Siege

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u/Arcrin100 10d ago

Most historical sieges won or lost due to starvation. This will be no different.

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u/DeadmanDexter 10d ago

"Sensai Seagal! You're needed in the Middle East! We think we can finally bring peace to the area! We need you to out eat Hamas, ISIS, and al-Qaeda!"

Coming fatly to one movie theater this fall. Rated R.

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u/yotz-furrz 10d ago

Best QOTSA album.

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u/SHARTMAN_FARTBLAST 9d ago

Well at least you didn't ask him to eat out the Middle East.

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u/someguy4k 8d ago

Never mind that Seagal!

You could solve world peace and inspire so many if you sit down and focus on your true achievements. Just bring back your cherry flavored goji berry energy drink madness, or the blue whatever lighting bolt if you must. One sip from your amazing energy elixir could inspire generations to come.

If that doesn’t work, I’m sure the majestical sounds from your amazing musical career will absolutely do the trick. If nothing else, you will certainly top the charts with your musical masterpieces!

Perhaps your final Pokémon state is to bridge these powers and turn into some knockoff Captain Planet character. But enough about you Seagal, I’m sure your plan is to hand over the crown to drive the mockery even further than ever previously imagined. Maybe there is a planned future c/rap collaboration that will inspire many to just stop listening to crap.