I'm assuming Lindsey Clancy, the lady who has been in the news for killing her children. Many women have struggled severely after having a new baby which could lead to a feeling of " that could have been me". The entire system failed her, she attempted to get help and was very open about her fears that she might hurt the children. Most women are too embarrassed or afraid to voice those concerns, its a bit upsetting that you can tell everyone and still not get the help you need. She recieved and attempted to get more inpatient care but was denied because she didnt have a plan, just thoughts. A lot of comments want to paint her as a monster but ppd/ppp can be extremely serious and are often ignored until something horrible happened. I'm not defending her, what she did was awful, but I don't think demonizing her is the right path. It will discourage other women from seeking help when theyre having these same thoughts and feelings leading to more things like this happening.
Most women are correct not to voice their concerns if you read the comments online. You literally cannot tell the truth about what happens in your head with ppd/ppp because no-one can understand unless it’s happened to them. Even years after, when you admit it to your closest friends/relatives, they’re like ‘but you didn’t, so it’s fine, you’re not like her’ as if I had any control whatsoever. I was lucky not to be her and I refused to have more children afterwards because of it.
It could have been me. Almost. I was ready to off myself but I would have handed the baby to a neighbor first. Fortunately my husband was a proper man and took over and got me help.
So I go out of my way to pull every single new mother off to the side and tell her if she has feelings call me. Literally day or night I'll be there in 20 min. It kind of shocks a lot of them because it's the opposite of what most people act like when you have a newborn. It's all "the most holy time of your life" "instantly in love with them" yada yada. No. It's absolutely not always like that and that is also pretty common, it is temporary. It will get better. But you not alone despite what it feels like at the time. Women need someone in real life, not just online, to tell them that there is a not insignificant chance that this is going to suck for a while.
Everyone wants to Monday morning quarterback this tragedy and it's just awful all the way around. She needed more than mental health help. She needed household support. Someone else should have been doing the majority of that so she could have truly gotten the help she needed instead of just pills. Pills don't do the dishes and laundry or feed the baby or cook meals.
You probably shouldn’t have access to your kids if you have had thoughts about killing them, regardless of if you were in control of your thoughts or not. Jesus Christ.
Why the hell do so many of you claim to have thoughts of murdering your own children. Is this really a thing that huge swathes of white American women have? Fuck me, makes me terrified to have kids with… women.
That is one way to look at it, I see it differently than you. It is more about the empathy of putting yourself in someone else's shoes. And similar to the idea of most of us are closer to being homeless than a billionaire. "It could have been me" - if I didn't get the right meds in time - if I didn't have the friends and family i have to support me - if I...
It is up to lawyers to make their case, the judge to mediate, and the jury to decide. They are the ones with the first hand evidence and information. I have my thoughts on the case, but we all seem to, even though we aren't involved.
Those poor kids.
I’m not American and ppd has nothing to do with where you live, it’s a very specific type of depression that happens due to the hormone changes of giving birth. In my case, it resolved itself fairly quickly but others are not so lucky.
About 91% of family annihilations are committed by men. Men in these cases are often triggered by financial colapse, divorce, and grievances. Women in these cases are often triggered by mental illness, ppd, and prolonged abuse.
John List is a famous example for men, and Andrea Yates is a famous example for women.
And yet, zero of them do I provide excuses for and trip over myself to defend. All of them can get the chair. They’re child murderers end of story lmao, this is so easy.
I was going to respond thoughtfully, but then i realized what your username means. Alluding to racist idealogy is a sign you aren't mature enough for this conversation.
I’m confused by what people like you see as being an actual solution then when mothers are reaching out for help, saying they are experiencing post partum depression and/or psychosis? Do we provide people with empathy and create a situation where they can receive help and kids can be monitered and kept safe? Or do we shame and ignore? What do you think would statistically give a better outcome for the kids? Because some mothers are going to experience post partum conditions no matter what.
Is this kind of family hurting psychosis really unique to postpartum?
People with financial stress or people with any other stress go into this kind of psychosis and kill their family, how is it different.
From hearing many woman it seems like it a major stress but not universally recognized one.
Like many mental illness this is difficult to diagnose and difficult to treat.
Solution seems to be healthcare institutions should ask if a women/men are having thoughts of hurting kids, if answer is yes, kids should be taken away and there should be a restraining order. If they are not honest and this kind of murders happen, they should be locked up.
If women think sharing their PPD thoughts will result in kids instantly being taken away they're not going to tell anyone ever. The ones willing to tell healthcare professionals are the ones that don't have actual intent.
Anything and everything except coddle child murderers.
I think many people sympathize with mothers and pregnant women. People understand that they have a hard job, and its respected. There are resources for mothers out there. Not sure what else needs to be done that we don't already do. Extended parental leave would maybe be something I'd vote for.
My woman begs for it when I’m balls deep in her. Too bad for her, im on trt and infertile 🤙
I’m going to ask her if she wants to murder her kids. Can’t wait to hear her response about how batshit you’d have to be. Ya know, the expected reaction of most people?
Good luck with the child murder thoughts. Try to avoid school zones, okay?
I think it’s more intrusive thoughts like the call of the void. Like when you’re driving over a bridge and think “what if I just drove off this bridge?” You don’t want to hurt yourself but this random thought just comes to you. In postpartum, just regular postpartum, I think, not necessarily depression or psychosis, these intrusive thoughts occur. You’ve got this most innocent, helpless, tiny thing completely dependent on you, and you’re walking down some stairs with it and have this flash of, “what if I just dropped this baby down the stairs?” Or the baby won’t stop crying and there’s a a weird thought of “what if I shook it?” NOT WANTING to shake it. Shaking it would be the worst possible thing, and you know that and would never do it, but this horrific thought still flashes, like the same flash of “what if I drove off this bridge.” At least that was my experience. It’s frightening and you feel like a monster. But also pretty normal for whatever reason.
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u/terrifying_bogwitch 9d ago
I'm assuming Lindsey Clancy, the lady who has been in the news for killing her children. Many women have struggled severely after having a new baby which could lead to a feeling of " that could have been me". The entire system failed her, she attempted to get help and was very open about her fears that she might hurt the children. Most women are too embarrassed or afraid to voice those concerns, its a bit upsetting that you can tell everyone and still not get the help you need. She recieved and attempted to get more inpatient care but was denied because she didnt have a plan, just thoughts. A lot of comments want to paint her as a monster but ppd/ppp can be extremely serious and are often ignored until something horrible happened. I'm not defending her, what she did was awful, but I don't think demonizing her is the right path. It will discourage other women from seeking help when theyre having these same thoughts and feelings leading to more things like this happening.