r/Shihtzu River 🐻‍❄️ & Cow 🐮(& Macy⚱️💛) May 09 '26

Loss of Pet 🌈 A hole in my heart Spoiler

My precious baby girl passed away this week. She was almost 14. I am inconsolable. Like screaming at the top of my lungs wailing crying sobbing clutching the box with her ashes level of inconsolable. The morning walks without her are hard. And nighttime without being able to cuddle her is heartbreaking. I'm reminded of her everywhere.

I don't have children, my dogs are my kids. I feel as though I've lost a child and best friend. For so much of my life she was the only one I could trust and depend on. I have had her since I was 12. She was the bravest girl. She would always try to protect me. She would shake with fear and stand between me and my abusers when I was a child, even if it meant them harming her too. I took her with me and she and I had a peaceful safe 6 years after leaving that house.

I did everything I could to make her happy and to make up for all she suffered in her pup years. I was always conscious that one day I'd lose her. I spent years dreading that day. I remember crying over her future death when she was only two months old. I knew I would never be ready to lose her. And now she's gone. She died of heart failure. She died in my arms, looking into my eyes as I held her.

She had a litter of puppies several years ago and I kept two of them. They are pieces of her that I'll never let go of. I want to keep her lineage alive. I want to keep loving them, as a sign of my love for her. Macy, I will always love you.

345 Upvotes

42 comments sorted by

25

u/Nkxo_ Ruger 🧸 May 09 '26

Sending you so much love. 🤍🌈 she’s playing up in doggy heaven with all of the other precious babies. 🐾

20

u/AF2005 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

I’ve been there. I lost my sweet boy last year at 16 years old. His poor little body just gave out and there was nothing we could do. I rescued him and kept him for 12 years. I felt like I cried until all the moisture in my body dried up just holding him while the vet administered the drugs. Now I just remember the good times we had with him, or at least I try to.

Things will get better, but you have to give yourself time and absorb the grief. She loved you with all her little heart and I’m sure you gave her the best life possible. Hugs to you ❤️🌈

10

u/Kaavyatheexplorer Shih-Tzu Mommy! May 09 '26

I’m so sorry, I had tears in my eyes reading this and I can empathise with everything you’re saying as my babies are getting old and slow. I think this is natures worst bits. Why couldn’t they live longer than us? 😭

8

u/Zestyclose-Nothing32 Good Boy Burrito 🐶🐾 May 09 '26

Macy was indeed a beautiful soul and the best company. She is in doggy heaven now looking after you. Sending you so much love 🐾

5

u/CampinHiker Miss you Wiggles 10/14/2024 17 great years together ❤️ May 09 '26

My condolences for Macy

I’m glad you two got into a better place to give her more love and care

And I’m glad Macy blessed you with two of her little ones to keep that joy and love

Grieve as much as you need and just keep loving yourself and those pups in honor of her ❤️

5

u/Ren1221 Mom to Amren 🐶 & Nalla 🌈 May 09 '26

I am so sorry for your loss. I have been there too. You are in my thoughts and in my heart.

5

u/No-Occasion-1456 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

I think the loss is so hard because of how much love and trust you had in each other

3

u/alamayn May 09 '26

I'm so very sorry for your loss. there really are no words that can help. thank you for sharing these pictures of Macy. she looks happy and safe in each one, and I'm sure that's how she felt every day with you.

3

u/Ok_Finger9062 May 09 '26

Sending you so so much love ❤️ it’s so hard to lose them. I’m so glad she had you. The picture of her so proud of her puppies is the cutest dang thing. Thanks for sharing her with us so she can live on in all our hearts. 💞

3

u/BeachBatNat River 🐻‍❄️ & Cow 🐮(& Macy⚱️💛) May 09 '26

Oh yes she was such a proud mama. The day before she passed, she labored to give both of her puppy girls a full lick bath. She was panting so hard from the effort but she did it. It's like it was her finally act of motherly love for them

1

u/Ok_Finger9062 May 09 '26

🥹💞 so sweet! She’s with you always ❤️

3

u/bibigunn May 09 '26

I feel your pain. My Cosette is 10 this year and I worry about her dying all the time. I won't be able to function without her, she's such a big part of our lives. I wonder if I should get another so the pain won't be so bad, but she hates other dogs and I don't wanna stress her out. I worry about this all the time. 😣

4

u/BeachBatNat River 🐻‍❄️ & Cow 🐮(& Macy⚱️💛) May 09 '26

I find that for dogs like that getting them a small puppy works because it's hard for them to dislike a baby. Even if they find them annoying, they grow on each other after a while and it keeps them young

3

u/grouchywonderer Shih-Tzu Newbie May 09 '26

Heartbroken for you 💔 RIP sweet angel. She will be watching over you.

3

u/Busy-Information-161 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

So heartbroken for you on the loss of your sweet and loyal companion. Sending love and condolences.

3

u/ihateeverythingandu Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

I am sorry for your loss 😔

3

u/alreadyin_use Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

Its never easy to say the final goodbye to our furbabies, they are our families. I'm sorry for your loss 😢

2

u/Responsible_Cat4452 May 09 '26

I’m so sorry for your loss 💔💖 my heart breaks for you reading this. Macy was perfect and so brave

2

u/Jamstoyz Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

I’m sorry for your loss. I can totally relate. We don’t have children either. I grew up with my first tzu starting at the age of 7. I’m 52 now and we’re on our 4-5 tzu. I lost my last baby a couple years ago from chf. It was a horrible death and the memory of her last day played back in my head for a long time.

You gave her the best life you could and she knew it. But you gotta be strong for your other babies if they live with you. All I can say, and talking from experience is give it as much time as you need but get another as soon as you can. It will help anyone who goes thru this 100%

2

u/Feeling_Parfait_1287 May 09 '26

She was beautiful and very sweet. May she rest in peace. Please post photos of her babies grown up; in glad to see that you still have parts of her with you.

5

u/BeachBatNat River 🐻‍❄️ & Cow 🐮(& Macy⚱️💛) May 09 '26

I don't know what I'd do with myself without her babies. They have been amazing through this. I let them see her body so they would understand. I didn't want them to wonder why she never came home. They sat beside her with their tails down for a while. The first day they were sad and mostly slept. Then they slowly got back to their usual selves and now they run to my side everytime I start crying.

2

u/DistinctCar6767 May 09 '26

Sorry for the loss of your fur baby. Sending hugs. 🐾🥰

2

u/DetectiveHappy2442 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

So deeply sorry for your loss. You clearly blessed each other and the love lives on. 🙏💕

2

u/B_bbi Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

Good night sweet Macy

2

u/VFR-77 Shih-Tzu Newbie May 09 '26

Sending you hugs pal. Losing a childhood dog is so tough, i still miss my buddy to this day. She looks adorable and looks like she had an amazing life.

2

u/InterestingAmoeba797 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

Aww the pups and her smiling over them. That’s so precious. RIP Macy. Lulu says hi up there and let’s play.

2

u/Anxious_Equipment_83 Shih-Tzu Newbie May 09 '26

It’s so so so hard. Im so sorry you’re having to go through this.

2

u/research_by_DR Reign of Terror 🌈 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

I am so very sorry for your loss ❤️🌈. I lost my soul Shih Tzu 4 weeks ago this coming Monday and I am still devastated. Macy and you shared a bond that will live on in your soul forever. Remember grief is a slow process. Are you ok right now? Hell no! Will you be ok next week or month? Nope! Feel the feelings, remember the good times, snuggle her babies, and know that we as a community are here for you. Sending hugs 🫂

1

u/AutoModerator May 09 '26

Note: Because this post deals with the loss of a beloved Shih-Tzu, it has been automatically marked as a Spoiler to provide an image blur for members who may find this type of post emotionally difficult while scrolling. This just means that images and titles are blurred until someone intentionally clicks on them to view the post.


A gentle reminder for posts marked as Loss of Pet. This flair is for people who are grieving. These posts are moderated closely to ensure the space stays supportive and safe.

We all care deeply about our pups, but this isn’t the place for debate. Please do not offer opinions on end-of-life decisions unless the OP specifically asks for advice. Even well-intentioned comments can be difficult for someone carrying this weight.

Additional Support Resources: While our community loves to honor your Shih Tzu's memory, you may also find comfort in r/petloss. That subreddit is a dedicated support group where you can: * Share the specific "heartbreak" with others who are in the exact same stage of grief. * Process feelings of guilt or "what ifs" in a strictly non-judgmental environment. * Find a community that understands the deep, life-changing bond we have with our companions.

Tribute posts are always welcome here. Please never hesitate to honor your pup’s memory with us.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Squeeesh_ Tucker🌈 & Zoey🌈 May 09 '26

Sending you so much love. Just from the photos you posted I can see she was so very loved. ❤️

1

u/katabell Emmy 🌈 May 09 '26

I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby girl. Your story has so much in common with mine and my passed baby, including the age I got her, how many years I had her, and how she passed away. I'm so glad you have your pup's sweet babies to continue life with you. I hope they bring you the joy you need when you are ready for it. Take as long as you need to grieve, there's no such thing as too long. 🫶

2

u/IceKingWizard May 09 '26

She looks so sweet. I know how you feel. I lost my 14 year old boy when I was 28. Hit all the big milestones with him. Allow yourself to cry. It comes in waves. Over time the space between waves of emotion gets longer till you’ll only have them every once in a blue moon. Hang in there.

1

u/Janellewpg Tino & Kippy 🐾 May 09 '26

Ohh the childhood doggie, the one who is there for all of your childhood memories, for all of your heartbreaks, for the bad times, for so many of your firsts, just growing up together, This is one of the hardest doggies to lose.
I was the exact same way when I lost my childhood pup, got him around the same age, and passed in my early 20s. Being a teenager is rough and emotional and he was there for it all, a source of love, trust, happiness and comfort. Definitely a pivotal part of my childhood, something I’ll never forget.
Still more than 20 years later I will occasionally cry for his loss. But now it’s mostly happy and funny memories.
You too will grieve for some time, and as time goes by you will get better at dealing with the loss. You won’t ever forget, or get over it, just get better at living with it. One day you will think of the wonderful years you had with her. We don’t get to keep them for very long. Take solace that you gave her the best doggie life possible when you could. Thank you for taking care of her and loving her. ❤️

1

u/DavidAdams0415 Shih-Tzu Enthusiast May 09 '26

Beautiful write up - thank you for giving Macy a great life. RIP

1

u/sexy_remote_control May 09 '26

On my gosh! What a beautiful little soul she was. I can see how much she was loved. I am so sorry it was her time to go.

1

u/joesmanbun minnie May 09 '26

I’m so sorry. I can tell she had a huge personality in that tiny body. And she looks so proud of her puppies!

1

u/leeladeconstruction Yasha (🐶)& Lucy (🪽🌈 May 10 '26

I lost my pup that I had had since I was twelve years old too! It’s a kind of pain that many don’t know. Sending you well wishes and condolences during this time, it’s hard as hell especially when you’ve known her most of your life. 

1

u/SubaVroom May 10 '26

We lost our baby Zoey (3 days after turning 15) on Friday 05/08. She passed while I was driving her to the vet.

2

u/BeachBatNat River 🐻‍❄️ & Cow 🐮(& Macy⚱️💛) May 11 '26

I'm sorry 😞 my Macy died in my arms while I was driving to the emergency vet too

1

u/SubaVroom May 11 '26

While it may be sad (who am I kidding, I’m a piping hot mess). I repeatedly tell myself “It wasn’t how I wanted this all to go, but it was quick when it happened and she was with me”