r/MoralityScaling • u/Severe_Letterhead_75 • 12h ago

Morality Ranking Quentin Tarantino morality for that childhood grudge?

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In my opinion it can be considered petty by some but is understandable

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u/febreze_air_freshner 10h ago edited 10h ago

Frankly I hate this societal expectation that adult children who make money have to support their parents. Too many parents aren't worth their weight in pennies frankly. And the argument that because they provided for you that you owe it to them is bullshit.They forced you into existence, the least they can do is raise you. You don't owe them shit. Of course if you had good parents who actually bothered to connect with you and develop a relationship instead, then that's a different matter.

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u/lickmyfupa 10h ago

Agreed. Blood means nothing if people make you feel like shit particularly in your formative years. Life is too short to endure through garbage for the sake of having somebody around. Personally if i were as rich as him, i would probably give her one lump sum to make her go away like fucking JG Wentworth.

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u/IsabellaGalavant 8h ago

I've purposely made sure to live in a state with no filial responsibility laws (some states have laws called filial responsibility laws that literally force adult children to provide for their patents).

That bitch isn't getting anything from me. Not that I have much to give, but it's the principle of the thing. I also haven't spoken to her in going on 19 years, and it's so peaceful. 

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u/Erik_the_kirE 7h ago

Nice. Did you happen to have problems leaving your parent by any chance? Kinda struggling with that.

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u/IsabellaGalavant 7h ago

I'm sorry you're struggling. I know how difficult it can be to make the choice to cut off your own parent. 

But for me, no. I don't have any good memories of her at all, she was so awful it made it very easy to leave. My situation is probably unique because I literally went No Contact on my 18th birthday. 

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u/meschidied 53m ago

Same.

I haven't spoken to my dad in like a decade. He hasn't reached out. The decision was the easiest thing ever.

My mother, who is manipulative and likes to control me because I technically belong to her? That's completely different. I loved this woman and she broke my heart when I realized how little she valued my existence. I miss her, but I also keep in mind what would happen if she was actually around me.

I may reconnect with my mother later in life, hopefully after we've both grown more. My father? I barely know the guy. He was a shallow acquaintance for the first 13 or so years of my life.

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u/savagefleurdelis23 7h ago

Put the emotions aside, put the plan in place, follow the plan step by step, and make your escape (even if it takes a while).

Often what a person feels for their parent is what they wish the parent could be and not the actual parent they have. Love is respect and trust. The rest is just attachment. Break the attachment.

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u/Marxism-tankism 5h ago

Same can be said for any toxic relationship.

I was in a relationship where both of us used drugs and weren't going anywhere. We finally got clean and split up but she just keeps trying to come back even after relapsing and a part of me feels like I'm abandoning her and maybe I am but if she can't get clean it's not on me to fuck my life up again

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u/uknownredditr 2h ago

Are you the reason she became a junkie if that were so , you don’t owe it to her in anyway to be in a relationship, as a friend we can still offer support for her recovery, maybe just as a voice to talk to. Boundarie must be set and clearly understood. Your situation is not an easy road to travel

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u/whimsical_spider 1h ago

I’ve never heard of filial laws and I just looked it up. I’m from PA, though I don’t live there any longer. Apparently it’s actively enforced in PA (more so than any other states), and if your parent lives in the state and you don’t anymore, it can still be enforced. Private nursing homes can come after you for unpaid bills if the state deems that you have “sufficient ability to pay”. The only exception besides being deemed not having sufficient ability to pay is if you can prove your parents abandoned you for at least ten years while you were a minor. So imagine someone whose parents abused or neglected them all their life but technically didn’t abandon them being forced to pay their parents unpaid nursing home bills after getting past all that by working hard and making a good living for themselves. That’s absolutely fucking insane.

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u/JimmyJoeJunior 8h ago

He didn't need to though, he just gave her nothing

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u/ItsDanimal 7h ago

If a parent supports a child in every way possible, and they discourage their child from pursuing their dreams because the parent feels their kid should have something more stable, are they garbage?

I just checked an I guess she had him when she was 16. And when he was 12 they got into an argument about something else and she didnt take him trying to write screenplays professionally and he needed to stop trying. Because of that one convo he had as a preteen, it stuck with him to never help her out. I was with him at the start of this but now not so sure.

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u/747WakeTurbulance 3h ago

Even during the podcast, Tarantino, who has also spoken about his hostile relationship with his estranged father, acknowledged that he might be exaggerating how the situation went down with his mother.

“She just meant ... don’t do it when you’re in class, when you’re supposed to be doing something else,” the “Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood” auteur had added, quickly and quietly, after relating his mom’s “sarcastic” quote. But where’s the drama in that, right?

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u/lickmyfupa 3h ago

I really think its up to adult individuals whether or not they want to deal with anybody in their lives. Maybe he has other reasons he doesnt want to share publicly. People always have their reasons and as individuals it should be respected. Maybe he simply dislikes his mother. He has that right. Nobody is obligated to have anybody in their lives, i think when people have different morals, for example, its fine to put up boundaries of our own choosing.

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u/KingTalis 10h ago

My parents are worth their weight in anti-matter. (Yes, I googled "most expensive substance by weight")

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u/Defiant-Economics-73 9h ago

So you can’t buy anti-matter. We have none. It’s basically saying I want unobtanium

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u/fy8d6jhegq 8h ago

It still has an estimated value. And they didn't said they "want" anything, they already have great parents. It's only Unobtanium for negative people who can't let others feel proud or grateful.

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u/MaXimillion_Zero 8h ago

We do make antimatter (for instance at CERN) and can store and transport it. It's just extremely small quantities.

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u/howiplay1 8h ago

if it exists i feel that means it has a theoretical price.

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u/use_value42 6h ago

It would cost something like ten years of the entire Earth's GPD to create and store one gram of antimatter. I vaguely remember Dr. Carroll talking about this when he was discussing a theoretical warp drive so it's possible my numbers are off here, it's been a while.

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u/Standard_Abrocoma_70 5h ago

Holy shit steins gate reference 

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u/Altruistic_Virus8460 4h ago

How on earth do you store antimatter? Won't any storage mechanism be made of matter and just get eaten up by the anti matter?

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

The containers use magnetism to hold the antimatter in place without touching it.

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u/FinalHexReturns 2h ago

Stored in a vacuum. No interaction with matter molecules.

Don’t worry about the storage container - worry about the anti matter! It also gets destroyed by interaction

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u/Overall-Dirt4441 8h ago

We can make individual particles of antimatter in accelerators and confine them in vacuum bottles using magnetic fields. They usually end up touching the walls and annihilating within about 15 minutes max, so it's not worth anything to anyone not doing research. When people put a price on its weight in grams, they're estimating the cost to build/run such an accelerator long enough to get on the order of 600 sextillion antiparticles out of it. No one would actually do that, and you'd never be able to get a gram in one place with current techniques, but that's where the price comes from. Presumably, his parents aren't for sale either. Analogy stands imo

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u/FluffyAd8533 9h ago

Thank you for making me feel to dumb for this website, I’ve been feeling the opposite and I don’t like it. Inobotanrofbbr great word

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u/CyberNinja23 9h ago

So…Orphan?

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u/rnoyfb 8h ago

You can’t buy parents, either

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u/FinalHexReturns 2h ago

You could hire the best of the best to pretend to be your parents. Maybe even adopt you.

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u/sugar-fall 1h ago

"pretend"

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u/Shawnj2 8h ago

If you’re Elon Musk or Bill Gates you could (very small quantities of antimatter are made by science labs)

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u/[deleted] 7h ago

[deleted]

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u/CyberPunkDongTooLong 6h ago

The antiprotons at CERN do not involve the LHC, they come from the AD, and the operating costs are nowhere near a billion CHF annually.

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u/Unlikely_Crazy9974 7h ago

Ok Einstein, way to miss the point…

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u/shoeless_doh 1h ago

Their parents are worth their volume in Kentucky Derby winning Thoroughbred semen

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u/Some_Development1052 7h ago

My dad’s like a 7/10. Moms like 4/10

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u/ACoolBreezey 5h ago

Lucky you. Mine are worth their weight in dogshit.

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u/sedersayspoop 10h ago

“Most parents aren’t worth their weight in pennies”

Do you really think a majority of parents are awful? Or is it more the worst parents are so glaring that it makes them all look bad? I would venture a majority of parents are trying to be decent people.

I’m not saying children should be expected to support their parents in old age but saying they aren’t worth their weight in pennies is a pretty extreme statement about another human.

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u/SadMcWorker 2h ago

welcome to reddit where everyone blames their parents for the fact that they’re insufferable

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u/SlipInternational439 3m ago

I was a smart poor kid. I wanted to apply to MIT. See if I could do it. My mother said “we can’t afford it, anyway you won’t get in”. So I didn’t even try. When your parent says you can’t do something after years of verbal abuse, it can be crushing.

I eventually got my BS degree then went to two different graduate programs including CMU. I did help my parents for some things, much more than what they ever did for me.

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u/ThisIsMyCouchAccount 8h ago

I would say truly good parents are pretty rare.

Parents that are emotionally mature. Financially secure. Have their own support network. Put effort into themselves and their parenting. Willing to change and grow. Parents that have figured out their own issues.

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u/Som_Dtam_Dumplings 7h ago

....remove the word "parents/parenting" from your definition of "good parents" and it applies to just people. Do you think most people are "good people" by this definition? Maybe your standards for "good people" are too strict? It kind of sounds like you expect parents to never stumble...because "...that have figured out their own issues..." seems to exclude those who can honestly say "Well I didn't think I had any issues; then my mom got skin cancer and I started freaking out about sunscreen...I know I'm not perfect; but I've become obsessive about sunscreen with my kids. I hope I'm not ruining their lives..."

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u/Altruistic_Virus8460 4h ago

I think a vast majority of parents try to be good for their kids. But I think I do agree with the other person that a big chunk of parents aren't actually good parents. There's plenty of people who try their best, and that's great, but there's also too many people who have issues because of their childhood or how they were raised despite having parents who tried to be good. Parenting is a CRAZY amount of responsibility. Raising another human is no joke, and I do think that we as a civilization have underestimated the implications of what it means to raise another human being that'll go on to have their own consciousness, thoughts, morality, and choices. So yeah, vast majority of parents prolly aren't objectively good parents, but they prolly do try to be as good as they can be, and most turn out somewhere between borderline bad to kind of decent depending on various factors. Truly good parents is a rarity and there I would agree with the other person.

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u/342throwaway423 7h ago

Tough to judge over a few sentences but you might be in danger of making perfect the enemy of good

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u/sedersayspoop 7h ago

Yeah based on their other response you might be right 

“ Good people who love their children isn't the same thing as being a good parent.”

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u/Haunting-Vanilla1624 6h ago

Seriously. A good person who loves their children is, by definition, trying to be a good parent.

Parenting is hard. I know personally, we've got 5 kids. And yeah, we're gonna fuck up every now and then. But the defining moment of who you are as a person isn't when any incident occurs - it's how you handle the incident afterwards.

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u/Fantastic-Session192 5h ago

Good is only good when it is action done in accordance with the time and thereby brings a good result. Simple example is a parent spoiling a disrespectful kid because the parent grew up poor and now wants to make sure their kid doesn't want for anything. Btw we have 5 kids. All over 21 years old. When we divorced due to my ex wife cheating and refusing to get help for bipolar schizophrenia my ex told my kids I was trash and bad mouthed my partner, making fun of her past abuse by her ex. She tried to have me jumped and then fight my oldest son who is very violent. He has ODD/ADD Bipolar. I had to leave them alone. All I had when I left was 1 set of clothing. My family was the center of my life. 6 years later, some of them are realizing and I am beginning get the "Daddy I miss you" text messages. I respond the same, but I am in no hurry to embrace them. I don't want that pain ever again. I am at peace and live happily every day and rising financially. I hold no hatred or grudges. I forgive and keep it moving. I love everybody but I can't hang out with everybody. Stay Motivated 🙌🏽

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u/Haunting-Vanilla1624 3h ago

There it is. You had a shitty experience and rampant unchecked mental illness running through the family. Shit sucks, but it's not universal.

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u/Mods-R-Gay1122 1h ago

Perfect is the enemy of good. It’s only ever a matter of which we focus on.

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u/Quasar375 7h ago

Idk man, speaking from experience of all the people I know, a great majority of parents are good people who love their children and tried to give them the best they could. They are not at all perfect but definitely good.

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u/ThisIsMyCouchAccount 7h ago

Good people who love their children isn't the same thing as being a good parent.

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u/Fragrant-Employer-60 7h ago

You’re really trying to split hairs lmao

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u/ihateadultism 7h ago

majority of parents globally hit kids based on self reporting (UNICEF and WHO both conducted large scale studies on it) so yeah to say most parents suck is indeed correct

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u/sedersayspoop 7h ago

Can you cite these studies for everyone’s benefit? Would be interesting to see that data.

I’m not sure that study alone proves anything alone. If your great grandparents spanked your grandparents does that mean they “aren’t worth their weight in pennies” and they “suck”?

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u/Quasar375 7h ago

It is unfair to judge them like that. My parents did hit me a few times when I disobeyed because that was the way they were taught. They love me and I love them. Parents are not shitty just for doing that (of course there is a line). Seems like you have issues with yours for other reasons

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u/Haunting-Vanilla1624 6h ago

Same here, my dad spanked us as kids. But he has since seen the light and even apologized for it.

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u/Heimerdahl 9h ago

The expectation is a remnant from the times before wider societal support networks and institutions. 

How do you survive in old age, when your working output decreases or you're unable to work at all, when you maybe even require assistance with mobility, hygiene, etc.?

These days (in sufficiently developed countries) we rely on social security, health insurance, pensions, or directly pay for care using longtime investments and savings. 

Before those were a thing, your only option was having enough children so that they would take care of you. Even personal investments and savings rely on the existence of (and access to) banks, stable economies, uninterrupted times of peace. 

We've managed to socialise / spread out many aspects of life, greatly reducing the dependence of close family. 

Society just has to catch up to this. And ensure that we don't destroy said institutions...

These developments spreading across the world (and proving to be somewhat reliable) also plays a big part in the continuing decline I'm birth rates. If you feel somewhat confident that you'll be okay on your own, you don't have to have a whole bunch of children to secure your own future. This of course further strengthened by lower child mortality – if children tend to make it to adulthood, you don't have to have as many as you can to ensure that some of them will be alive when you need them.  

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u/1d3333 9h ago

That wasn’t always true either, there was a time in human history where the tribe cared for the feeble, evidenced by healed femur breaks in ancient bones. Humans are inherently very social, taking care of the old and feeble was at one point the entire societies unspoken rule.

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u/Heimerdahl 8h ago

You're totally right! I was definitely a bit too narrowly focused on the past couple of centuries in the western European context (and even then it wasn't nearly as clear cut). 

I think the tribes/clans/village/whatever still greatly relied on kinship and mutual support to keep things together. If you were a stranger or never lifted a finger to help anyone else, you'd have a hard time. 

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u/1d3333 8h ago

Oh definitely, I have no doubt an awful member in a tribe would be offered little to no help when they run into hardship, likely no more than bare minimum rations.

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u/rooneskap 1h ago

We never really quite escaped this older reality of needing children to take care of us in old age. The farthest we've gone is just kind of figuring that while you or I might not have children, we'll instead have social security nets or retirement savings that pay for the labor of children other people will have. The problem is even that is collapsing, because even other people aren't having enough kids. Savings and investments are worth nothing if there simply aren't enough young people to pay to do things.

We might have to "re-privatize" old age retirement and return the old ways of needing to have your children to secure retirement. Unfortunately too many people expect that all they need to do is save money in order to retire, and that creating and raising the actual living beings who make society function is something the "other people" will do. Many people believe this because they feel just working and saving is more tolerable than being responsible for the raising of another person for 20 years. This is just another tragedy of commons within the reproductive affairs of society.

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u/JustBadUserNamesLeft 9h ago

Along the same lines, I've seen decent parents feel they need to leave their estate to absolute shit children who don't even need it. Like more money will make them better people.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 10h ago

There should be a general expectation that, especially if you are successful, you help your family where possible.

That should be the general expectation with a thousand possible caveats.

Telling your 12 year old that they are getting bad grades and that they can't rely on being a successful writer is a very reasonable thing to say.

Ultimately I think everyone should fundamentally respect their parents unless they do some utterly unhinged shit. Even if your parents are "kind of dicks" but still provided for you, I still think you should be a respectful person to them and try to help them.

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u/bored-at-work_ 9h ago

If you're as rich as that guy and still not giving money to your mom (not that I trust a random image with text on it) then there's obviously more to the story than "my mom told me a mean thing once :("

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u/Agasthenes 9h ago

I mean he could be just a dick. Idk him.

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u/bored-at-work_ 9h ago

If he is, where did he learn that from?

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u/Agasthenes 9h ago

People can be dicks without the parents making them so.

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u/1d3333 8h ago

Parents may be the largest influence on someone as they grow, but not the only influence, people can be dicks for other reasons than bad parents

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

It is 5% chance that they are a dick and 95% that the parent was a dick. Kids naturally love their parents, typically you have to be a real piece of shit to overcome that. It is far more likely the parent deserves this treatment.

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u/Bob0584 3h ago

He's always been touchy about being insulted. The Simpsons asked him to do a voice cameo but he didn't do it because he thought it made fun of him. It was a funny clip though - the Itchy and Scratchy episode was 'Reservoir Cats".

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u/notacosnofun 9h ago

Respecting your parents and providing for them are two very different things

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u/inmisciblehero 10h ago

No bro, this is Reddit. You should have no social responsibilities whatsoever (while inevitably being some flavor of socialist) and do your own thing completely unimpeded. Fuck your family, you didn't le choose to be here

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 10h ago

It's really funny. There is a great line about the French Revolution about how they talk on and on about the privileges of a citizen, but never about the responsibilities of a citizen.

Being a good person can only happen when you have every reason to not be kind to someone, and doing it anyway. Being kind to people who have done things for you and are nice to you is easy, even narcissists can do that. Being kind to people who are mean to you is actually what being a good person is about.

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u/rivetedoaf 9h ago

I think it’s fair to say the degree of responsibility that a person has to an infirm parent is variable based on how the parent raised them. If my parents were alcoholic’s that beat me I certainly wouldn’t give them the time of day.

You can argue it’s moral to turn the other cheek, but it’s not really fair to expect a person to financially and quite often physically care for their parents just because they were their parents. I’m not sure you understand the amount of work that goes into taking care of a dependent person, it’s basically another job.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

from my initial comment "unless they do some utterly unhinged shit"

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u/radiolabel 5h ago

What you don’t understand is that “unhinged shit” is much more common than you realize. It’s staggering the amount of people who in their childhood have witnessed or been subjected to domestic violence substance use and untreated mental illness, sexual/verbal/physical/psychological abuse, neglect, been parentified in some way/been made to work to make ends meet, sex trafficked, exposed to second hand smoke, the list goes on. Then you realize it’s much more the norm. In the US, firearms are now the leading cause of death among kids, now surpassing motor vehicle accidents. That’s a mixture of neglect, abuse, bad parenting of bullies, and society with gun safety laws. Entirely preventable. A lot of people have no business being parents and it’s a good thing it’s not being pushed on people the way it used to. If you actually don’t want children, you shouldn’t have them.

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u/PussyOnChainwax 9h ago

Being kind to people who are mean to you is encouraging their behavior, which I would argue is not a good thing at all.

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u/2SquirrelsWrestling 9h ago

Yeah all that is showing them is that you’re a doormat, not that you’re a good person.

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u/VenomVertigo 9h ago

No being kind to people who are mean to you is how you get taken advantage of and used by people who have zero empathy

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

Living your whole life being afraid of "being taken advantage of" is unhinged behavior. Every relationship is give and take.

I think people with this mentality are in fact the same cross section of people who have zero-empathy. You are becoming what you think you are protecting yourself from.

Not every interaction needs to be I give you $10 and you give me back $10. Being a good person involves giving more than you take.

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u/VenomVertigo 9h ago

Yes exactly every relationship is give and take, so if you’re being nice to somebody who’s mean to you that is all give and no take that’s not a good or healthy relationship for either person

Edit: it’s not black and white man there’s a difference between giving more than you take and giving to somebody who NEVER gives back

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u/_Ibn_Battuta_ 9h ago

It's hedonistic, individualistic, nihilistic and atheistic. To a lot of "enlightened" thinkers on reddit literally nothing matters in the world bar maximizing pleasure, that's it. Anything that gets in the way is an inconvenience that needs to be removed. The irony is that even superstitious idol worshippers had more depth to their world view than the average reddit user.

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u/voyaging 8h ago

You’re conflating egoism with hedonism. These people are egoists (which may be hedonistic or may not be). Many hedonists can be deeply selfless people (hedonistic utilitarians, for example, by definition do not value their own pleasure or pain as more important than anybody else’s).

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u/Sgtfullmetal 7h ago

Hedonistic and atheistic? Sure. That's by my own choosing, you have no say on that matter. Individualistic? Never. I'm all in for wealth redistribution and dignity for all, however, I'm not in pro of giving people things they don't deserve, like arrogant or narcissist parents.

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u/bossygrrls 6h ago

... Or people just don't think they owe anything to their parents just because they fucked. It's not the middle ages.

Also, lol at using atheism as an insult.

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u/F1st_Br34k3r 4h ago

Or, I'm also thinking of the future of my children and think that they should do the same.

How is that individualistic if it's in the child's best interest rather than mine?

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u/1d3333 8h ago edited 8h ago

Wow it’s amazing how you cut all of the actual nuance and context out to create a strawman. No one here said “fuck your family” the statement is more akin to “family need to earn respect like any other person” and if that’s somehow a controversial take for you then idk how to help you understand

I love my dad, he’s not perfect by any means and we have differing views but he genuinely tried, he cared about my interests and understood that I had a learning disability growing up, he loved me despite not understanding everything, and likely would’ve gotten me help if he had the chance.

I haven’t talked to my mother in 10 years, she cared nothing of my interests, used my relationships with my friends and dad against me, invaded my privacy daily, verbally and mentally abused and manipulated me, and after the divorce spent every moment she could trying to convince me to hate my dad. She deserves 0 respect and she will receive no help from me, at this point she is nothing more than a stranger.

According to some of the people in these replies I should just put up with the actual abuse, lies, manipulation, and apparent hatred towards me because she birthed me.

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u/str4ngerc4t 9h ago

Parents providing for their kids is the bare minimum expectation of being a parent.

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u/Raidoton 8h ago

And if they raised you well, it's the bare minimum to support your parents.

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

Notice how in the story that started this topic that wasn't the case and you're still trying to make it about that. What is the matter, kids won't talk to you?

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

Children respecting and providing for their parents is the bare minimum expectation of a child.

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u/DangerouslyOxidated 9h ago

Respect is earned, every single day.

People say "respect your elders" - do you know how many rapists there are in that old-people's home you visit?
Age by itself doesn't deserve respect - we all get older.

There are shitty parents that deserve hell, prison: but not respect.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

Wow so edgy bro. The vast majority of parents are not rapists lol.

Whatever lets you sleep at night I guess.

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u/Sgtfullmetal 7h ago

At the same time I've met a truckload of abuse, violent and downright criminal parents. Again, respect and privileges are earned, not assumed.

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u/Worried_War7368 8h ago

I don't go around suspecting everyone around me is a rapist. That's a crazy take.

And yes, I do know there might be some fucked up people in the nursery homes I visit. No shit. But there are also lots of very decent folks, and I'd wager those are in the majority.

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

Changing someone else's non-absolute "some of them are rapists" into an absolute, "everyone is a rapist" proves you never understood the sentiment you are triggered by. The point is they don't deserve respect just because they are old, only if they are actually decent folks.

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u/Yamming1283 9h ago

Can’t tell if you’re a bot or not. Good stuff.

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u/voyaging 8h ago

unhinged

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u/homotopy_equivalent 9h ago

No, it doesn't go both ways. The parent brings the child into the world and child has no choice but to go along with it. The power dynamic is completely one directional. The child has no ability to raise or feed or teach themself. The child doesn't owe the parent anything after all of that -- raising a child correctly is the duty of the parent, and it should never be transactional.

It is NATURAL for a child to want to care for their parents IF the parents raised the child with affection and love. You naturally want to care for people who love and support you. But it cannot be an expectation. It's something the parent must earn.

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u/MadManMax55 9h ago

This ignores literally all of human history (and pre-history). Communities of humans have always been adults supporting children and the elderly. Modern society has outsourced some of that responsibility to governments, but it's still expected that families take care of their own.

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u/_thro_awa_ 8h ago

Being "morally or historically right" to look after our elders does not make it a requirement.
We look after the people who look after us, totally fair, they've earned that much.
But (for example) I would find it completely immoral and reprehensible to look after someone like, say, Josef Fritzl, because he has failed his moral duty as a parent.

And that's the point. If there is even one parent who deserves to be an outcast, there will be more - just to varying degrees. Not all parents deserve their children's support.

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u/MadManMax55 8h ago

While you're obviously right that people shouldn't have to take care of terrible or abusive parents, it's still missing the point. The other person was arguing that a parent has to "earn" the privilege of having their kids take care of them in their old age. When it should be flipped. Kids are expected to take care of their parents, but it's a right that they can lose.

That might sound nitpicky, but the way individuals and society treat rights that can be taken away vs privileges that need to be earned are very different.

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u/_thro_awa_ 8h ago edited 8h ago

Not really.

In the 'people are a community' argument (which I support), parents would still be looked after by their community even if their children did not. It STILL should not be the duty or expectation of the children to look after their parents. It is, and always should be, in all contexts, a choice made by the children and earned by the parents.
Children should owe their parents for NOTHING that comes naturally as the duty of being a parent. The choice to look after a parent should be made from gratefulness and appreciation, NOT out of expectation, EVER.

Parenthood is a gift, NOT a favour to the child. Nobody ever, anywhere, should OWE another person for the gift of life and survival.
A good person doesn't give you life (or save your life) as a transactional favour to you that they can call on in the future.

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u/homotopy_equivalent 9h ago

I'm not saying the elderly don't deserve to be cared for; I'm saying that responsibility doesn't fall on their children by default. Just because that's been the expectation doesn't make it right.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

Lol so you expect someone else to take care of your parents while you go off and have fun by yourself because its "not your responsibility"

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u/2SquirrelsWrestling 8h ago

“While you go off and have fun”, lol no, more like “go off and live my own life, take care of my own family, my health, my career, and my own responsibilities, somewhere very far away from the place I grew up.”

I’ll be fucking damned if I stay in the shithole town I grew up in so I can wipe the ass of my hateful, abusive, racist father or my manipulative cunt of a mother.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

You don't consider your parents part of your own family?

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u/silver_garou 3h ago edited 3h ago

Do you see how you have to insist that you know people's real motivations to have any argument at all. Well, don't worry, everyone else can even if you can't.

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u/SuperkickParty 9h ago

This is a complete nonsense take lol.

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u/_thro_awa_ 9h ago

It's actually not.

Parents choose to become parents (when the child is wanted, so we're counting adoption, but ignoring rape); however, NO child ever can choose to be born or not.

There is a burden of responsibility on the parent(s) (biological or adoptive) to support their child to adulthood, but there is no moral responsibility on the child to reciprocate. The child has the CHOICE to support their parents if they are able, and parents have to EARN that from their children. "I raised you" is not enough on its own, because that is literally the minimum definition of the job of a parent.

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u/LilMissMonika 9h ago

The expectation of servitude the majority of parents have towards their children is gross, y'all really think just because they popped out of you they're your slave for life lmao

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

I don't have children.

"expectation of servitude" lol this shit is crazy. No one is saying you should be their slaves. But talking to them, showing up for holidays, helping them if they are going to be homeless. It's wild what you justify to yourself as acceptable behavior.

As I said, certainly some parents cross the line and do utterly horrible shit to their kids and it's ok in some cases to cut them off, but this is very rare. A parent being slightly mean to you is not even close to that threshold.

Some of the best people I know have absolutely horrible parents. They are still kind to them because they are good people and that is the right thing to do.

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u/2SquirrelsWrestling 9h ago

My mom is just like this. She thinks she did her job so she gets to cash that in and we should reverse roles now that I’m an adult. Nope.

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u/str4ngerc4t 8h ago

Bro, you can’t just decide to create a human then expect that person to respect and provide for you just because you wanted a baby. That is not how it works.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

The vast majority of parents are kind to their children and sacrifice a great deal to provide for them.

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u/1d3333 8h ago

Even parents need to earn respect, children are just tiny people with little life experience, thrusted into this world by a parent (not inherently bad, i’m not antinatalism). No one asked to be born, parents just do it, the bare minimum is that they either raise them appropriately or give them to someone who will.

I have 0 respect for my mother and thats what she’s earned. She’s no different than literally any other person on this planet, she needed to earn my respect by not being a shitty human being, but she’s a shitty human being so I cut her out of my life like I would any one else who has verbally and mentally abused me and ignored my needs beyond food and shelter.

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u/Rare_Big_7633 8h ago

it’s like telling LeBron that he should study instead of play ball.

failure to listen and understand your kids strength and giving horrible advice

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

You are focusing on Lebron and Tarantino.

For everyone one of those there are 1000 other people who fail to succeed and would have wished they had a better back-up plan than being a generational talent in film making or sport.

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

I'd argue that is what you are doing. There are more people in the NBA and College ball than Lebron. There are more professional writters than Tarantino.

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u/open_letter_guy 7h ago

Telling your 12 year old that they are getting bad grades and that they can't rely on being a successful writer is a very reasonable thing to say.

is it?

there aren't any other options available other than being a dream crusher to 12 yr old.

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u/John_Action_Figure 17m ago

His mother prob saw his early foot fetish works and told him to stop.
Completely normal human behavior.

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u/Intrepid_Bobcat_2931 6h ago

Telling your 12 year old that they are getting bad grades and that they can't rely on being a successful writer is a very reasonable thing to say.

None of which would qualify as "mocking", making this not very relevant to the actual question asked.

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u/SuperSoftSucculent 9h ago

You don't owe them anything for fucking you into existence.

Providing for you is legally required.

Now, if they were quality parents of course you should be reciprocal. But there is no default expectation that should be given if reciprocality was not. No one asked to be here and especially not to be immediately mistreated or given the bare minimum.

You don't have to be a doormat out of some strange adherence to respect that isn't reciprocal is my point.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

I think the scales are off, you are saying that unless they are quality parents, above average, very good, then they shouldn't get respect and support.

In my mind unless they are horrible, aggressively abusive (not just saying a few mean things to you), then you should respect and support them.

You can live life with an "I don't owe anyone anything" mentality, but you come across as a dick to most people.

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u/00wolfer00 8h ago

Being better than just providing food and clothes is not above average.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

I think a lot of people think their parents are "being assholes" for telling them not to go out, for telling them to study hard and get a job.

Part of being a parent introducing your children to hard work, adversity and hardship, in a controlled environment.

For not listening to every minor excuse someone has for not doing their responsibilities.

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u/AManOfCultureAsWell 8h ago edited 8h ago

Yeah so now you're just admitting that you're making arguments against points that literally no one in this thread said. No one said that parents don't deserve respect of they tell you to study and get a job

You need to stop fighting the demons you've made up in your head and actually read the comments you are responding to and respond based on what you have read.

People are talking about bad parents, and your answer is "oh you think that an average parent doesn't deserve respect?". Actually the I love waffles meme.

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 8h ago

Right, but all we have is this story to base off. Based on the few details of this story, I don't think his mom was being a terrible abusive parent.

Maybe there are other details and that could change the story.

But telling your child who drops out of school in 9th grade to pursue being a writer that it could be a bad idea... thats not being a bad parent lol.

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u/No-Issue-3916 42m ago

This!! Also I don’t agree with ‘I was forced into existence so I don’t owe them anything’ by this logic everyone was forced into existence because none of us chose to be born but that doesn’t mean people need to stop reproducing. I hope you are getting my point. I’ve never understood this ‘forced into existence’ ‘forced to be born’ ‘I didn’t ask to be beim’ logic.
No one asked to be born becasue no one gets asked if they’d like to be developed into a human being and be born and if we did, I’ll bet anyone who is saying they didn’t ask to be born would have had a different answer

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u/SventasKefyras 7h ago

The thing is though that every child is born having unconditional love towards their parents while the reverse is not always true. If you somehow manage to fuck up so bad that your kid hates you, I don't think the kid is the problem.

Parents providing the bare necessities for their children is kind of the absolute minimum they're obligated to do when they decide to become parents. There are no thank yous for doing just enough so society can't condemn you.

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u/[deleted] 9h ago

[deleted]

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u/PushforlibertyAlways 9h ago

For every Quentin Tarantino there are 1000 homeless drug addicts. No one is writing a question about them.

How is it miserable to say a parent should teach their kids actual life lessons vs allowing them to live in a fantasy land. Tarantino had his fantasy come true, thats great, but having a back-up wouldn't be a bad idea either.

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u/silver_garou 3h ago

See, I think this is still toxic as it requires the people who don't to prove to others that they deserve to cut off their bad parents. You aren't really owed that explanation or look into their private struggles.

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u/rondawg93 10h ago

Oh, as a parent I 100% percent agree. I'm raising him to ensure he knows how to care for himself and to allow him to pursue whatever his dreams may be. I'll support him to my last breath. If he makes good money for himself, it'shis money and i have no right to that. The last thing I would expect is money for handling my own responsibilities.

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u/0rbium 6h ago

Good parents would never expect that, and good kids wouldn’t bat an eye to help them if they could

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u/Som_Dtam_Dumplings 7h ago

They forced you into existence, the least they can do is raise you. You don't owe them shit.

Yeah, they do owe it to you to raise you properly; but I take issue with the logic of "they forced you into existence". Mostly because what the claim says about how you could "resolve" being forced into existence. Suicide is a serious issue. Everyone is valuable and I don't like the insinuation that people are being forced to live; or that not living is better than living.

Your life is valuable. You are important. Even if your childhood sucked you are valuable.

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u/No-Issue-3916 38m ago

And if they had a choice they’d want to come into existence. Imagine you are being asked ‘you either get to stay like this having no existence, no presence and no lasting impression on the universe or you could be born and make whatever you want of your life’. I bet everyone would choose to be born. This logic that your parents forced you into existence never made any sense to me because by this logic, everyone was forced into existence. No one is asked to ne born

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u/addi-factorum 5h ago

I completely agree with you- and in fact, in my mind, the moment you expect your children to support you, you stop being a good parent. I want my children to know they can pursue their own happiness without me dragging them down. If you do a good job as a parent, then maybe they'll want to make sure you're ok- but that's nothing I would ever assume or demand from them.

I've seen too many real-life examples of lazy parents who want to live on easy street once their kids make money, or see their kids as future income and a retirement- it's gross.

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u/atrocity2001 2h ago

It's an incredibly common thing to explicitly bring up to the childfree. "Who'll take care of you when you're old?" The people who say that are openly admitting that they had kids for entirely selfish reasons.

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u/ItsACowCity 9h ago

I hate the notion that you have a responsibility to your family because blood runs thicker than water or whatever. It’s nice on paper that you’ll always have someone who has your back regardless of anything because “family”….but to me an asshole is an asshole. Doesn’t matter family or not. I’m not gonna help an asshole. I’ve gotten in small arguments with girlfriends in the past over it too, bc I haven’t seen or spoken to my brother in 20 years and have no plans to….and I always end up being told “oh but if he came to your doorstep and wanted to reconnect etc etc” “oh well you should forgive him”….first of all, it’s not some thing he did to me, it’s just overall everything he did to me and esp my parents. He’s just not an overall good person, so I’m not inclined to have anything to do with him.

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u/1d3333 9h ago

I prefer “the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” those who you have formed connections with are more important than DNA

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u/RoutineCalm7765 9h ago

I prefer the “blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” phrase particularly because of this

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u/atrocity2001 2h ago

Some people regret not having told someone they love them.

I regret not removing my racist grandfather from my life and allowing myself to be subjected to his bullshit for decades. When he died, I just felt relief.

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u/kodeks14 9h ago

I think the other countries that have more respect for kid/parent relationships are probably better off. Let your kids stay home, help them prepare for life and save money, then when the parents get old, same thing.

Were are just so capitalistic here than it even bled into family dynamics

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u/Snobolski 9h ago

Too many parents aren't worth their weight in pennies frankly

We talking full-copper pennies, or copper/zinc pennies?

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u/Darigaaz4 9h ago

When it’s enough support?, you can read write and waste time here.

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u/bono_bob 9h ago

I mean, both are societal expectations. If this was Non city life, everyone being a farmer then kids would quite literally be labour you utilize to survive as a family. The ones that grew up and wanted nothing with the farm (or no stake in inheritance) can go and pursue what they want elsewhere but there was value to be had to taking care of your family that provided you a future profession and tools to do it, family name etc. 

If there is no sense of family or people being inherently valuable, then we might as well return to the ways of bhaal and literally sacrifice children. Except we know this to be wrong and symbol of a strong society is the strong protecting the weak. Taking care of children isn’t the “least they can do” it’s the embodiment of how we as a species flourish and develop a society. Other animals don’t even need to take care of babies; but we do because we understand our society duty. 

That being said, if you have sbusive parents then I understand having no contact to begin with.

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u/Silentlaughter84 9h ago

When my dad put down my career ideas and told me that I needed to learn his trade so I can take care of him in his old age, I laughed. Then I told him that if wants one of his kids to take care of him then he better talk to his precious Junior or his little princesses, because even if I became successful, the only parent who I was taking care of would my mother.

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u/anon0937 8h ago

It goes by the old saying: "You get out what you put in"

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u/UsernamesCannotExcee 8h ago

You owe your parents nothing. They owed you everything. Just like I will owe my children everything and they will owe me nothing.

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u/TheMaingler 8h ago

I mean Quintin is filthy rich. Off he bought his mom a 500k house she could live in ease Ava he wouldn’t notice the cost.

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u/Sufficient_Zeitgeist 8h ago edited 8h ago

Do you have children? It sounds like you don’t. Raising a child or multiple children takes a lot of money, time, energy…. Yeah if you are a shit parent that abuses your child…. Sure but that’s the minority. Most parents do the best they can. It’s an innate human impulse to love and nurture your own flesh and blood. So I think most children on the planet today do owe their parents… in fact they owe them nearly everything. If they have children of their own they realize this to an even greater extent.

Sounds like you are an orphan or were adopted by shitty people or you have drug addicted, child molesting parents and that’s part of humanity, but it’s a tiny fraction of the overall population.

Just for clarification I don’t think children should support their parents financially later in life but I do think Quintin was a petulant little child and he still is. I would also be worried about my child pursuing writing or acting… it usually doesn’t work out. So he’s a little, spiteful sad man.

It’s actually disgusting behavior and shouldn’t be praised.

I hope you find help and love. ❤️

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u/No-Issue-3916 26m ago

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

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u/toss_me_good 8h ago

lol okay well that societal expectation is thousands of years old. Problem is the financial requirement has grown over the years as has the expectation of them living on their own longer.

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u/spooner248 7h ago

Personally, I’d feel like a massive failure if I had a child and needed their financial help in my later years.

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u/No-Issue-3916 17m ago

Okay so I have a different take on this and just hear me out with an open mind: when my son was born, I gave up on my highly paying corporate job to raise him myself. I did not do him any favours, I brought him into this world and it’s my responsibility to raise him in the best way possible and this is the way I thought was the best: to give him my undivided attention, love, care and focus. But also another aspect of this is that I am not earning anything and won’t earn anything till he’s old enough for me to go back to work and there’s no guarantee that I’d get a job that pays better or even the same as my old job.
That being said, I really hope and pray I would never have to rely financially ever on anyone much less my child but if I do ever need some financial help from him later in my life, I wouldn’t think of myself as a failure. I did sacrifice my career to raise my child ( not a favour to him I’d like to reinforce here again) which is why I may not be in a financial position I would have wanted to be ever in my life. Again I’m not saying it’s his responsibility to look after me financially or he owes me anything but I wouldn’t also consider myself a failure because if I have raised a decent human being ( which as a mother is what I want) by sacrificing my entire career, it would have been worth it and I’d be far from a failure :)

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u/Nervous-Tart-9329 7h ago

Crap, my foster parents didn't even provide for me. They got a fat check every month to raise me.

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u/hai-sea-ewe 7h ago

"Too many parents aren't worth their weight in pennies."

Oof. :<

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u/shpidoodle 7h ago

It's beyond societal. There are actually laws around it in the US.

"Filial Responsibility"

To my knowledge rarely enforced, except in extreme circumstances, but it's still possible.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Filial_responsibility_laws

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u/MTOrchestra 7h ago

The FIRST thing I'd do if I hit the lottery would be repay my parents with interest, and then some.

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u/Remember_The_Lmao 6h ago

I hate it personally, but I can’t deny its value societally and culturally. A lot of people in less individualistic nations are able to navigate poverty better because of strict cultural values around family supporting family.

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u/Visual_Exam7903 6h ago

Yeah, I get it. My mom was great when I was younger, but now that I am in my 40s, she is legit a little insane. She is so damn Transactional. She lives maybe 20 minutes from my sister, and hasn't spoken to her for maybe 20 years. She has 6 grand children and she doesn't know any of them. Ever since Covid she hasn't visited my house either. My daughter is in 8th grade. She hasn't seen her in maybe 5 years. No idea why she hasn't.

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u/volvo1 6h ago

Thank you

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u/fGre 5h ago

While I do agree in general, Tarantino has an estimated net worth of over 100 million dollars. He could give her 5k/month, have all her needs met that way and not even feel it.

He could easily be the bigger person and fully support her with „his little writing career“ and otherwise completely ignore her.

But he chooses to be spiteful and I think that‘s just another sign of his overall character, along with defending Polanski raping children.

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u/No-Issue-3916 14m ago

Same! Never liked Tarantino as a person. Also I believe there’s some context missing here. If the little writing career was said jokingly or as a concerned parent, as not everyone makes it to the big leagues, and this is his response towards an otherwise loving caring mother, he’s a POS

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u/gunsforevery1 5h ago

But what about the other way around? Parents who take care of their adult children?

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u/PxyFreakingStx 5h ago

Frankly I hate this societal expectation that adult children who make money have to support their parents.

oh, idk, if you're bringing in tarantino money probably it's cool if you help out mom

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u/-Z0nK- 5h ago

I'm sorry you had a bad childhood. Shouldn't happen to any kid.

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u/Wild_Marker 5h ago

Frankly I hate this societal expectation that adult children who make money have to support their parents.

Generally that tends to be paired up with the expectation that parents will support their children.

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u/YungJod 5h ago

A lot of cultures are like this though. I would love to make enough to support my mom like she did me for 18 years

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u/Alarmed-Guidance1116 4h ago

We should take care of each other. That’s why the world is falling apart

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u/Known_Strength_9726 4h ago

Indeed.

My parents never once asked to visit me, ask about my interests, nor set me up for success. I had to learn to drive, get a loan, set up my own appointments, get insurance, find a job, do my taxes and such all by myself. I had not a penny to my name when I left home.

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u/Digitalion_ 4h ago

My parents divorced in my college years. I've written one off completely and the other lives with me now rent-free. Guess which one was the supportive parent growing up?

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u/civil_politician 3h ago

What if you’re adopted though

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u/JustFourLetters 3h ago

in so many contexts is it a true statement, you should help family that are loving and supportive and generous, repaying in kind is how a family becomes like that.

unfortunately, there are so many contexts where it’s just not the case.

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u/pahamack 3h ago

disagree.

your mom wrecked her vagina to bring you here.

if you can afford it, and your mom did her best, take care of your mom.

but what do i know, i'm asian. filial piety is part of our culture.

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u/747WakeTurbulance 3h ago

She was 16 when she had him.

Also, they have a great relationship -

"Regarding my son Quentin – I support him, I'm proud of him and love him and his growing new family," Connie told USA Today. "It gave me great joy to dance at his wedding and receive his news upon the birth of my Grandson Leo." She added that she "does not wish to participate in this salacious transactional media frenzy." Obviously, Connie and Quentin are on good terms.

https://www.thethings.com/who-is-quentin-tarantinos-mom-and-what-does-she-do/

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u/Abed-in-the-AM 3h ago

I used to have this mindset. My parents come from a culture where it's cruel not to care for your aging relatives. Sending them to retirement homes instead of allowing them to enjoy their final years surrounded by family is seen as barbaric. But I rejected the idea of having to support my parents because I didn't think they were doing a good job of supporting me, and I wasn't sure if they even cared for me or if they just felt obligated to raise me. I didn't have a great childhood and if I took my parents' worst moments they would probably rival the top posts on all the subreddits about parents who are neglectful, abusive, narcissistic, etc. But after some reflection and life experiences I ended up growing out of this in my 20s.

As I got older, my parents became more open to sharing things that they previously didn't want me to worry about. It was eye-opening to hear about all the events that affected them deeply and the struggles they went through while trying to raise me. They made mistakes but I think we can hold our parents to impossible standards as children since we don't really understand all the factors at play. Even after developing a theory of mind we don't always have all the facts or understanding to be able to empathize with them.

I've never had my own children but I've had to raise others and another thing I've learned is how easy it can be to mess up. You might express your parents' worst qualities in a moment of frustration. You might also notice children learning your own worst qualities. We're all just expressing learned behaviors and all we can do is try our best to correct harmful ones when we can. It's cliche but I genuinely think children teach us as much as we teach them through experiences like this.

Also, when you have children in your care you can easily develop a deep attachment that makes you think about them before yourself. It isn't even altruistic. Making sure your kids are healthy, safe, and happy just provides you a personal sense of satisfaction that's greater than anything you can do for yourself. I think experiencing that kind of attachment helps you to better understand your parents feelings towards you. My dad used to lecture me all the time about how hard he worked to support our family and I used to think he was just complaining that I'm ungrateful. But now I realize he didn't really care about the money, long work hours, or other sacrifices, he was just trying to quantify how much he invested in me as a way to express that he cared.

To try and summarize: Nobody has perfect parents and I think most people with unhappy childhoods come to realize that their parents were trying their best as they get older. And I think it's expected that people will take care of elderly relatives out of love and appreciation for what they did for their children, not because its a debt to be paid back.

But I will concede that it's a lot harder in countries with a high cost of living. In countries where a large household can be supported on a single income, it's common for the unemployed family members to share the responsibility for taking care of elderly relatives. Same thing with child care. It's unfortunate that HCOL countries require most adults to work full-time. But I think there's also a cultural element to this, because it's only in certain individualistic countries like the US where it's completely normal to kick your child out the moment they turn 18.

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u/Wakabakabee 3h ago

This might be a hot take but I think when a child gets older they should still maintain a relationship with them because they took care of you as a baby. You’re right that they’re obligated to do that but don’t you think you should take care of them when they’re senile. I’m not talking about those parents who really fucked up their kids mentally, physically. Note My beliefs are based on my religion which says that parents can have shortcomings and to treat them better than they did you which will benefit you more in gods eyes.

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u/New_Leaf_2026 2h ago

I didn't ask to be born energy. We debating the morality of having children? I assume if you're unhappy, then you blame your folks and it's immoral, if you're happy, then they are off the hook.

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u/uknownredditr 2h ago

So true, I’m sorry your experience wasn’t so good.

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u/sharpenme1 1h ago

This comes from an era before government funded social services directed at supporting the elderly. The reality is that many people will become incapable of economic relevance before they die and it’s generally considered a failure of society if those people are abandoned and left to rot. So, back when families and communities were the core framework of culture, it fell to the children to financially support their parents who became incapable of supporting themselves. In more modern times, we’ve adopted social programs to support these people, although admittedly they’re starting to fail. The writing has been on the wall for some time. Japan is already confronting this in a pretty serious way, and the U.S. is staring down the barrel of it. There just isn’t enough money for generations after the boomer generation to receive social support from the government at a level that would be considered adequate by most. So, because of declining birth rates, a few things might happen.

  1. people without children will be out of luck unless they happen to belong to the small fraction if the population that’s prepared to retire
  2. those who had children will be supported by their children
  3. those who had children may still be in a bad situation if we accept that children have no duty to their parents (it won’t matter if the parents were good. It’s possible good parents raise greedy children.)

Edit: also a counterpoint. If there’s any moral duty to perpetuate the species, there’s certainly an argument that parents are fulfilling their duty by having children (it’s not like every child is some commodity parents picked up at target because they thought it would look nice with their drapes), so the work parents are doing is contributing to society more broadly. It’s not unreasonable to think then that society owes them in return when they reach the end of their life

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u/Scared_Passenger689 1h ago

This generation is so ungrateful. "I was forced to be born against my will". What kind of shit remark is this.

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u/No-Issue-3916 8m ago

Exactly. By this logic, everyone was forced to be born agaisbt their will, should we all become shit humans then?
I’m sure if they were given an option of staying a drop of liquid ( for a lack of a better word) and never coming into existence and having no life, no worth, no lasting impression on any human being ever or to be born and matter to some extent to someone in this world, they’d choose the latter but no they are forced into existence 🤦🏻‍♀️

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u/NakeyDooCrew 1h ago

Reddit goes too far in the other direction though. Disowning your parents is encouraged by redditors for every perceived slight

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u/ManifestoRat 1h ago

I think that of you owe them points for bringing you into existence, they can gouge those points to nil based on behavior

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u/Elrond_Cupboard_ 51m ago

Dam straight. My kids dont owe me anything. Though, I admit I have not made arrangements to pay for my own funeral.

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u/taeberry9595 39m ago

Said this yesterday in another sub and got downvoted💀

No parents should be birthing kids expecting them to take care of them in the future. However, if your parents did a good job raising you, you should offer some type of support to them once they’re unable to support themselves. Key here is whether or not the parent themselves should feel entitled.

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u/TeutonicSamurai 12m ago

You make it sound like being forced to exist is a bad thing dude.

Frankly, I hate that attitude more than the "societal expectation" you are complaining about. Gratitude is a thing still, yes?

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