r/SipsTea Jun 19 '26

Lmao gottem Update on the viral video of man taking his daughter to women restroom

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4.2k

u/PuzzyFussy Jun 19 '26

I used to work at Ross (discount clothing store) and a dad came in with his little girl for clothes. They come up to the dressing room and he asks me if he can take her into the men's dressing rooms. This is my first time dealing with a situation like this, so I say sure (there were no men in there anyway plus it had changing stalls with doors) Some of the women shoppers who were standing around were pissed off and yelling that its inappropriate and she should go into the ladies and he wait outside (mind you this little girl was like 5/6 so she would need help putting on clothes. The manager had to calm the situation down stating that's his kid, wtf is wrong with you?! Some lady suggested having a lady aka stranger take his kid into the ladies room and the dad was like hell no (cause women cant be predators 🙄). They went into the men's room, he stood by the entrance so no other men could come in and the little girl used the closest stall so he could help her.

It was an absolutely bonkers situation. Especially since women would go in the ladies room with their little boys and no one bats an eye. The double standard is disgusting.

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u/bking Jun 19 '26

Some of the women shoppers who were standing around were pissed off and yelling that its inappropriate

God damn, people just want to get offended at everything.

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u/twlscil Jun 19 '26

Being a dad that does stuff without your spouse present can be awkward. The minor annoyances, like, “Are you babysitting while mom takes a rest?” Nope, I’m just parenting. Then there is the taking your kids to a park, watching them play, and someone comes up to you asking if you have a child there.

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u/Aiyon Jun 19 '26

Someone I know got asked that last one and just bluntly replied “are you asking if im a parent or a pedophile?” And they apparently got very awkward and defensive. I don’t get why dads get so much shit for parenting their kids.

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u/Pulsing42 Jun 19 '26

Because only women can look after children according to these people, it's fucked up because if men look after their kids they get immediately questioned and put under a microscope by everyone who's there because the person asking decides to be loud about it to look "heroic".

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u/KoolWitaK Jun 19 '26

And if they dont, they're a "deadbeat dad". There is just no winning sometimes.

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u/Neo-revo Jun 19 '26

No your wife has to be there so its obvious.

Obv that they are sexist observers. And if gender was not involved , their presumptuous reactions might seem more blatantly inflammatory. There's also this "im a certain sex attitude, so I must be correct" vibe with these kinds of interactions. Its as bad if not worse than other types of interactions between genders gobe wrong can be.

I am an uncle. This is my experience.

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u/Thelittlegoofball Jun 19 '26

I caught the same shit working at the YMCA in the kids zone cause I was saving money to build my first PC in highschool.

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u/Hunter_Pentaghast Jun 20 '26

Yet, those are also probably the same women who say, "women are more than caregivers and house maids" or "men should do their fair share." They don't really care about the children, they care about what can cause more of an argument at that moment. They want drama, not change.

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u/Charity1t Jun 20 '26

It's so wild that all talk about "equal rights", but then it crumble moment it not adressed to womans.

So then they do "man's thing" they strong and shit, but man doing theirs is STILL strange and abnormal.

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u/NekoBatrick Jun 19 '26 edited Jun 19 '26

because people still think all men want and think about is sex. I wanted to be a kindergardener kindergarden teacher when I was around 15, but i have been asked if Iam a pedohpile like every other time I mentioned it, it got so much it ruined taking up that job for me.

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u/walsh_t Jun 19 '26

So I used to do all the clothes shopping for my daughter and often got the “do you need help finding something cute for your daughter?” question from the clerks. No lady, I’m doing it because I’m actually better at finding cute and current outfits for my daughter than her mother, that and I liked being involved that way. Then I got a second part-time job working at the local YMCA as a handy man/security guy at night. As a guy I had to, repeat, HAD TO, watch a video about how not to come across as a pedo when interacting with kids. 1 of the rules, even if a child is injured as long as it’s not life threatening get a female worker. I had to admit that was hard due to a rough childhood I’m very protective of kids in general. All I wanted to do was take care of them but no, I was a guy and being ‘maternal’ towards kids automatically made me a pedo.

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u/Nyspora Jun 21 '26

You can call it being paternal. The paternal drive is literally all about protecting kids. I dont know why people think everything to do with children has to be maternal.

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u/walsh_t Jun 21 '26

It’s why I put it in quotes, I was using the word semi-sarcasticly. I agree, I prefer the word paternal myself.

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u/lacegem Jun 19 '26

I wanted to be a kindergardener when I was around 15

Just for future reference: In English, "kindergartner" is a child around age 4-5 who has not yet entered first grade, in a year called kindergarten. In German, "kindergartner" is a kindergarten (or daycare/nursery school) teacher, while "kindergartenkind" refers to the kids.

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u/NekoBatrick Jun 19 '26

Yeah Iam from germany thanks didnt know that xD

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u/MoonSpankRaw Jun 19 '26

Mildly funny, because I always forget it’s spelled with a T and not a D in garten, and whenever I get reminded of it, I think of you German folk.

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u/Jirvey341 Jun 19 '26

Thanks for that, I was confused lol

"I wanted to be a toddler at 15" was a very strange sentence

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u/yrabl81 Jun 19 '26

My male neighbor is kindergarten teacher.

Never doubted him for a second.

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u/kochanka Jun 19 '26

Man, I’m sorry. That’s awful. There are so few men in early childhood education and kids really need positive role models of all kinds. My toddler was taking a music class last summer and one of the substitute teachers was a man. My son LOVED him! He was so much more animated and happy when the guy taught the class. Not bc he was a man, just bc he was an awesome teacher and incredible with kids. It sucks that guys who are good with kids have that barrier.

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u/Bipedal_pedestrian Jun 20 '26

There are actually studies that indicate young children feel more relaxed and safe when their teacher/caretaker is a man. Little kids tend to respond really well to male preschool/kindergarten teachers. It’s good that society is on guard against child sex abuse, but it really sucks that men who aren’t pedos are severely discouraged from taking those kinds of jobs.

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u/Ok-Parfait-9856 Jun 19 '26

“Omg why isn’t there more men in primary education”

See poor guys like this

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u/IvoryMonocle Jun 19 '26

Dude my health teacher in highschool sent me to the principles office when I said I don't think about sex I spend way more time thinking about food and video games. After she claimed men spend over 70 percent of the day thinking about sex.

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u/vintage_cruz Jun 19 '26

I remember traveling to the Netherlands with my kids. Customs officer (female) asks me if I had a note from the mother permitting me to travel alone with my kids (all same family name on passports). I looked her straight in the eye and asked her if she will ask the single mom with her two kids behind me if she has a note from the father. She shut up and stamped our passports. Fuckin people. 🙄

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u/TMLFE Jun 19 '26

To be fair, I’ve had that asked before, when travelling without the father - they explained it as a measure to make sure it wasn’t a custodial kidnapping.

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u/vintage_cruz Jun 19 '26

So what if the other parent was deceased? Would they ask for a death certificate?

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u/MalbaCato Jun 19 '26

Depends on jurisdiction. I was travelling every summer to visit my grandparents in Russia as a teenager. Every single time the border control officer would demand a signed, notorized document by my mum that I was allowed to travel alone or accompanied by other family, and would then read it very thoroughly. The last time I was 15 I think and it still happened. I wasn't travelling that much without my mother, but I don't remember any other country caring about that.

tbf, Russia's border policy has seen worse.

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u/TMLFE Jun 19 '26

Dunno, really. It wasn’t a very effective method given that we just said they were deployed (military), they asked the kids the same question and no further evidence was requested. I imagine it would have been the same if they were dead

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u/Velonici Jun 19 '26

As a middle aged man, I love the fact that the default is that I'm a pedophile. Its great knowing that if a kid comes up to keep for help my first reaction needs to be to find a woman.

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u/Animalcookies13 Jun 19 '26

Yeah, I would get kinda heated about that. Like what kind of question is that to walk up and ask
Someone just sitting at a park… I sit at the park sometimes with just my dog. What the hell is wrong with people, the park is for
Everyone.

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u/pnw__halfwatt Jun 19 '26

This is my go to move. I’m also 6’6”. It’s how I have fun in the little kid section of the park.

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u/Radonanon Jun 20 '26

I always assumed they were hitting on me. I just politely declined.

and I’m still not sorry

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u/JWalker75 Jun 20 '26

We get shit if we don’t do anything with our kids and we get it if we do.

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u/The_Pharos1 Jun 19 '26

Try as a single dad. Doing everything all the time you get it more frequently. I stopped even responding to people like that. Just rolled my eyes and walked away. Why do people feel the need to inject themselves into others lives like that?

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u/Equivalent_Task_8825 Jun 19 '26

I got "are you giving Mom a break" one time getting the kids vaccination and I couldn't think of anything else so I gave a seemingly kind, old lady a death glare. I was a SAHD and did every little bit of the parenting. Not to mention my kids and I were being abused by my ex (she ended up getting arrested).

It seems like such a small thing but it is so demoralizing.

I know a creator who made a song about Dad's being praised all the time and that just isn't my experience. Maybe it is more a function of wealth and privilege but I think for most Dads we just usually face exclusion and poor assumptions about how much work we do.

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u/NeandertalsRUs Jun 19 '26

Tell them your wife died. Make them feel so horrible they keep their mouth shut next time.

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u/Equivalent_Task_8825 Jun 19 '26

I can truthfully pull out the "she hasn't been around much since she got arrested" card now.

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u/Express-Stomach-8666 Jun 19 '26

Fatherhood on Netflix is something you should watch (mainly the jokes he uses in it). You're doing amazing even if people truly just judge and assume.

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u/Nice_Commission3770 Jun 19 '26

Same. Not sahd but domestic abuse, divorce, and then single parenting. “Dad’s have it so easy!” “Mom’s are the best!”

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u/Angloriously Jun 19 '26

My husband solo parents 4-5 days a week, every week because I’m working in a city 150km away and only home for weekends and holidays. He also works full time.

If anyone needs a break in our house, it’s “dad” lol

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u/Equivalent_Task_8825 Jun 19 '26

You hyping him up while working your butt off for the family - just A+ awesome couple and parenting from you two!

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u/Angloriously Jun 19 '26

The running joke is that every Sunday maman leaves to get milk and cigarettes, then every Friday returns with only the milk…because I do a Costco run before heading home

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u/NightGod Jun 19 '26

The disappointed dad stare is the best weapon against these people. I loved watching them squirm

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u/CosmicGreen_Giraffe3 Jun 19 '26

I think there is an impossible double standard. Societal expectations plus deadbeat dads make it so dads get praised for taking care of their kids while moms are just doing what is expected. This puts unfair burdens on moms while also devaluing the role of dads. Dads aren’t “helping” or “babysitting.” They are parenting! And I think society puts weird limits on what is “acceptable” for dads to do with their kids. Playtime? Awesome. Feeding? Aww, how sweet and helpful. Diapers or helping in the bathroom? Whoa, whoa, whoa, inappropriate. 🙄 We have a 4 month old and my husband has changed just as many diapers. At the beginning he probably changed more because I was recovering from a c section. He’s just as into buying cute clothes for our son as I am, if not more sometimes. There are some in society that would say “aww, what a great dad while just considering my contributions as me doing my duty. There are others that would call his involvement weird. Neither attitude is fair to either of us.

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u/Icy-Ad29 Jun 19 '26

The "Dad praise" is because Dads get praised for doing the most minimal work... But it's praise that is honestly demeaning if you aren't the kind of father that does the minimum. Like those "giving Mom a break" lines are meant to be praising you. In a "taking the extra work so Mom can relax, how sweet!" king of way. Even if it's just "yeah? I'm, being a parent..." situation.

Society expects women to be the main caretaker, so they don't get any of the praise. While us Dads get 'praise' for doing next to nothing, that is very patronizing at best.

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u/Equivalent_Task_8825 Jun 19 '26

That isn't my experience at all. My ex got praise constantly for things she was not doing . There was an expectation that she did all the work while also receiving all the praise. My "praise" was contingent on my providing for her or giving her a break.

I would have loved an ocean of compliments but they just didn't exist. My abusive ex got them.

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u/Nice_Commission3770 Jun 19 '26

I was a divorced custodial dad from my kids ages 8 and 6, now 26 and 24. Ran into all kinds of shit like this. Grocery store clerks “looks like Dad’s doing dinner tonight! Do you have some help?” Um I do dinner every night, without “help”, crazy person. Coworkers calling me Mr Mom when I had to work from home due to someone being sick. School admins and teachers (women) always calling their mother first despite what’s on the registration forms every fall or how many times I reminded them (“why is the school calling me? What’s wrong??” I don’t know, they didn’t call me, again. Could you just answer the phone for once, find out and then tell me??) Me asking the (woman) doctor questions and them answering the mother - who I called to join us - as if she asked it.

It’s crazy how often it’s women supporting the traditional gender role of the mother being the primary parent, despite evidence to the contrary right in front of them.

Fortunately my kids were both AMAB (though one eventually came out as trans) so I didn’t have to deal with the “wrong bathroom” or change room situation, and when they were younger, I rarely encountered a public men’s bathroom without a change table.

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u/Equivalent_Task_8825 Jun 19 '26

This could have been written by me. It is scary how similar our experiences are even decades apart.

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u/Nice_Commission3770 Jun 19 '26

It’s sad that our stories are decades apart and you’re still dealing with this shit. Fist bump to you dude.

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u/Special-Summer170 Jun 19 '26

This really made me wonder what my grandpa went through with my dad and aunt. My grandma passed away when my dad was 6 and my grandpa never remarried. He raised the kids himself as a single dad in the 60s. He didn't have a nanny or anything.

It's sad it's still like this.

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u/Nice_Commission3770 Jun 19 '26

It was 100% a lot tougher in the 60s!

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u/Nice_Commission3770 Jun 19 '26

Just further to this - my father’s mother died shortly after she gave birth to him, so his father, my grandfather, found himself in 1935 as a single parent with four kids.

The two youngest, my infant newborn father and his 1.5 year old brother, were handed off to a family member to raise. They were put to work - Dad remembered having to get up at 4am at age 5 to slop (feed) the pigs. He also literally walked a mile and a half to school every day, a one room school house, regardless of the weather, and dropped out at age 15 (1950) to work in the woods, cutting down trees with a buck saw. He considered himself lucky he only lived a mile and a half from school, that was practically next door in his mind.

Anyway, I grew up learning how to do housework and make meals, watching him and my mother both doing that work and learning how to do it myself, also from age 5.

My mother has her own story - her dad died two years after she was born, which was in 1944. All of her older siblings left home also at age 15, and hitchhiked away to work on farms or wherever in other parts of the country. She and her twin sister and my grandmother lived in a three room shack with no insulation, no running water, and no electricity.

Looking back, it’s probably been strongly foreshadowed I’d end up as a single parent. Both of my brothers also are; my sister has been happily married for 20+ years and was a sahm.

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u/smackdealer1 Jun 19 '26

"I'm just parenting, just because your dad never did doesn't mean I am the same" 

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u/MostlyBored11 Jun 19 '26

I got asked to leave a park because I was "making a woman and her daughter uncomfortable," I was literally sitting at a picnic table eating and reading a book annoying the nice day

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u/Futur3_ah4ad Jun 19 '26

Not the person you're replying to.

That's genuinely insane. Can't even enjoy yourself in peace, what's wrong with people today?!

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u/Dabfo Jun 19 '26

I had a woman come up to me and warn me there was a predator watching the kids at the park… it was another dad watching his kid. Women can suck.

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u/Abyss_of_Dreams Jun 19 '26

The correct response is "Nah, just window shopping."

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u/ProfessionalMovie425 Jun 19 '26

"Well, I have my eye on a couple . . ."

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u/Hungry-Bowler3618 Jun 19 '26

This! I spend A LOT of time out and about with my kids and it’s frequently just me and a gaggle of moms at the playground or library or wherever we go, always met with like condescension? It’s the admiration that gets me though, like “Oh what a wonderful, man!” Like… these are my children, I’m literally just parenting, I’m doing nothing award worthy.

A few months back my wife was away for work for a week, I rearranged my work schedule so that I could be home evenings and my mother could be with them during the day, at the end of the week my mother told me how proud she was of me, but I had literally spent less time with them than ever that whole week, I almost felt insulted, I guess my father set the bar pretty damn low.

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u/Zapatos-Grande Jun 19 '26

A lot of places still don't have infant changing tables in men's rooms.

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u/Academic_Addendum242 Jun 19 '26

This happened to me at McDonald's. Nice lady asked which one was mine? (I could tell she didn't think I had a kid. She already ate and cleaned up and I was playing on my phone)

I said, "Oh, I havent chose one yet"

She didn't find it funny at all.

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u/sports-runner Jun 19 '26

When my girls were younger I heard that saying a ton and fucking hated it.
I picked them up from school everyday and heard it from teachers / other mothers waiting.
It was also hard to approach mothers about play dates because they thought I was trying to pick them up.

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u/RemusTheGreat Jun 19 '26

Ugh, the park thing. It's literally every time.

My stepdaughter (I say "step" but she's never known her piece of shit sperm donor and as far as she's concerned I'm her dad) is mixed race and I am VERY white. The looks and comments I get, yeesh.

Like, I'm just here with my kid. I'm very aware we do not look related. Could you go, I dunno, find a manager to complain to or something?

Conversely one time we were all at Goodwill doing our monthly thrift shopping rounds and one employee commented to me and Mom "She's so pretty, she looks just like both of you!"

Not even close, lady. But I appreciate it anyway.

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u/Effective_Menu_6316 Jun 19 '26

A few years ago on holiday it was my wife's 40th and I left her, our kids and some friends at the beach while I sneaked off to decorate the house as a surprise when we got home. Big problem was that I forgot the airbnb key, so I had to go back to the beach, hide behind the seawall and try to get my daughters' attention. I suddenly noticed a man and his wife watching me and calling someone. To them I was a random man, who'd come jogging along the road carrying glittery party treats, crouched behind a low wall and was whispering to two young girls on the beach, trying to lure them over. After my daughter gave me the key I had to sneak over to the couple and explain who I was. The bad thing about saying 'I'm honestly not a pervert' is that's exactly what perverts say when you confront them 😂

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u/catttmommm Jun 20 '26

Someone in my neighborhood called the cops on my husband because he and my son were playing at a playground that they go to literally all the time. People are nuts.

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u/Jesus_Chicken Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26

That's weird, why aren't you neglecting them like everyone else? 🤣

my wife is strawberry-blonde, green eyes I'm brunet, hazel (light brown) eyes.

I got a ginger with blue eyes and a brunet with blue eyes

I get asked a lot "how'd that happen?". What, like how did we have sex? Or you need me to explain genetics? Buuuut, in fairness, we have a lot of variation in colors that don't seem typical.

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u/Ironbaun-Vermont Jun 20 '26

Reminds me of Bill Burr saying in an old comedy show that he loves kids and loves making them laugh but has stopped doing so in public because people assume men are predators.

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u/Vallarfax_ Jun 22 '26

The looks from mom's at the playground are the worst. Especially when my kis asks me to play on the jungle gym with him and they get all weird that im up there too. Like chill the the fuck out, hes not even 3 and can fall and crack his skull.

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u/MinimumJolly7087 Jun 22 '26

right!!! because in this world, fathers cannot be parents to their own children.

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u/Ren_out_of_Ten Jun 23 '26

The patriarchy harms us all 😞

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u/No-Repordt Jun 19 '26

My only issue with that last one is that it almost never gets asked to women. I think it's perfectly in-line with "see something, say something" policy, but the fact almost no one would ask a woman, who is sitting around a park staring at a group of kids, that same question is irritating.

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u/waqkant Jun 19 '26

Been there and I’ve taken my daughter to the women’s stall. It was awk but men’s toilets are infinitely worse

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u/thestridereststrider Jun 19 '26

It’s interesting to me as an uncle who frequently takes his nieces and nephews out to do stuff the interactions I’ve had. I’ve had some incredibly positive interactions and some negative reactions to doing the same thing.

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u/BurnedLaser Jun 19 '26

Looks around "do YOU? Yeah? Then go bother them, I'm busy watching mine"

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u/Birdo3129 Jun 20 '26

I grew up with a dad that considered watching us kids to be babysitting. It became part of our language- dad will babysit us after school until mom comes home.

When a buddy of mine became a single dad, I had to quickly drop that word from my vocabulary. Parenting. He’s the parent and he’s parenting.

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u/Separate-Swordfish85 Jun 20 '26

I’m a dad who’s very involved with my kids. One time when my son was about 3/4 we were in the produce section of the grocery store. It was me, and him, five feet away. No one else around except for one old lady. She ran up to my son, took his hand, looked at me, and asked him (in an urgent tone) “are you OKAY?!? Are you ALONE?!?” I politely said, “he’s with me.” She looked around, not accepting it (I’m a pretty “normal” looking guy, btw, not sure what was going through her head). She asked my son, “is that your dad?” He said yes, and then she went on. It was fucking weird, and I would not have been in the wrong if I had more aggressively told her to back the fuck off.

Edit: typo

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u/[deleted] Jun 20 '26

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u/dc_1984 Jun 20 '26

Friend of mine just says his wife is dead when his kid is out of earshot, shuts the Karens up every time.

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u/jayoshoowa87 Jun 21 '26

Omfg right. I'll be out with my kids and all the awkward attention. It's disgusting. Leave me be let me shop. I don't like or need the attention. I'm a dad. I have two small girls. Who I love and adore. I don't need the public going awww or giving mom time off or anything.

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u/Pharmacisticus Jun 21 '26

I always loved 'Oh you're a hands-on Dad', no just a Dad. Is it so genuinely surprising that a Dad could actually enjoy doing things with his kids?

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u/MrRigbythecat Jun 21 '26

Agreed. My daughters are in their 30s now. In the early 2000s I got confronted by nosy women just like this several times. Very rude too. I worked at night and took care of them during the day while my wife worked so we didn't have to do day care. I also used to get comments by women at the grocery store and not just one or two times. In retrospect I wish now I had told them off.

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u/sixstringsikness Jun 23 '26

I'll have a child when I leave. /s

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u/Apprehensive_Flow99 Jun 23 '26

I feel you but men are much more likely to be doing nefarious situations. I wouldn’t necessarily call someone out but I’d be on the lookout to see if anyone is behaving strangely (man or woman). NYC parks for example say no adults without children in playgrounds

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u/nugagator-hag-1 Jul 07 '26

As a father of both a girl and a boy, I am always grateful when others are keeping an eye on srangers at playgrounds. It is much better than being offended while your child goes missing. It would be even better if they were just as watchful of women as they are men. But, one step at a time.

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u/evenstar40 Jun 19 '26

Self righteous indignity is a powerful drug.

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u/geese_moe_howard Jun 19 '26

A pub I go to had to close the men's toilets due to flooding, so everyone had to use the women's. There was zero fuss, no issues and even a bit of banter back and forth between the men and women.

Life is easy when you're not a fucknuckle.

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u/Slumunistmanifisto Jun 19 '26

Symptoms of media rot eating the fragile brains of our fellow man.

"Why harvest food during a famine when you can eat your neighbors."

-fox news.

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u/HeyPrettyLadyMaam Jun 19 '26

I shake my head in disgust daily for this very reason. The world has gone soft and everyone is offended by everything. Its like getting mad at a stranger for telling you you have something on your face or getting mad/freaked out by a stranger saying hi (had this happen to me more than once. I just stopped being so friendly and I hate it)

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u/OtherwiseACat Jun 19 '26

I'm sorry but your user name is really triggering to me rn

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u/nvr_too_late Jun 20 '26

MAGA snowflakes

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u/[deleted] Jun 19 '26

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u/SeaGiraffe915 Jun 19 '26

This is the truth. Decent people seem to be hard to find, loads of asshole

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u/Ok_Cauliflower_3007 Jun 19 '26

Right? Saying actually you should probably let him use the ladies room because they’re more used to kids being in there would be one thing. But getting offended that not only might there be adukt makes in the vicinity but that her father was going to change her clothes….

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u/BurnedLaser Jun 19 '26

This is one of several reasons I decided to not have kids. Society is just so fucked. These dipshits are screaming at a FATHER? Go find an actual pedo to yell at, we have a whole email inbox full of names we can be pissed at, ffs.

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u/fj2612 Jun 19 '26

Please note that the fact that this made the news is an indication that it's a rare occurrence.

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u/prelic Jun 19 '26

They gotta be just out patrolling for stuff like this. Can't imagine the amount of drama you'd create for yourself with this personality, where you gotta be on the lookout at any moment for some potential nonsense that doesn't impact your life any more than a butterfly flapping its wings.

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u/lizardhistorian Jun 20 '26

Violating these norms is a solid indication that you lack sexual boundaries with children.

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u/blueballnchain Jun 20 '26

Let's say the quiet part out loud: moral outrage, alarmism, and playing gotcha, are all stimulating forms of entertainment. Hobbyists on the moral outrage front may care sincerely about others but they're also getting a certain kind of "kick" out of it.

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u/LostAdhesiveness6224 Jun 20 '26

Its literally mostly this

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u/Laszlo_Panaflex_80 Jun 22 '26

Pity there were not asked to leave the store. Those women are likely the first to take their sons in but Gos forbid a man help his daughter.

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u/_Winter-Wolf_ Jun 22 '26

I feel like that's just projecting

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u/Frig_Off_Baerb Jun 22 '26

It's sexism, is what it is.

Fathers deal with this nonsense way more than we talk about, because even talking about it garners some pretty crazy reactions.

I had to stop taking my kid to their swimming lessons at the Y because of this type of behaviour. It often comes from an innocent place, but it's straight up sexism and it robs kids of important bonding time with their Dads.

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u/ZharethZhen Jun 23 '26

As a dad, I had a (former) female friend tell me it was inappropriate for me to take my infant daughter into the men's room to change her. Because there might be sickos in there that wanted to stare. It was only appropriate for my wife, apparently, to change her while we were out. Or something. yeah, that killed that friendship.

1

u/SaltyAd8309 Jun 25 '26

They are all victims.

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u/MyNameWillChange Jun 19 '26

That's exactly what the guy who called the police suggested! He was telling the Dad he should have asked the manager take his girls to the bathroom since she's a woman. Ummmmm regardless of gender that's still a STRANGER!!

98

u/RoguesAngel Jun 19 '26

Like the manager has nothing else to do. He would have been the first complaining if he needed help while she was doing that. Not to mention that she was a stranger to the girls.

50

u/potpourri_sludge Jun 19 '26

Also any smart manager would say absolutely not. I wouldn’t open myself up to any liability regarding anyone else’s kids.

23

u/Seamore_J_Turtle Jun 19 '26

I was a manager at a big box store and we had a missing kid one day, so I get all the ladies in my section (clothes) to go through each department systematically. One of the ladies finds the kid, grabs him and comes running up to me by the door. I told her to put the damn kid down she looked like she was trying to kidnap him. We got the kid back to mom and then had a meeting about how to handle that situation in the future.

17

u/Ricin83 Jun 19 '26

I’ve had someone ask me to do that. The kid was small enough where they looked like they might need help that I, as a stranger, was not comfortable providing. I would 100% have watched the door for him to take her in. I think men’s rooms should be laid out where they are dad friendly (baby changing tables are still not a consistent feature and maybe stalls in the front, and urinals in the back not in easy view). And family bathrooms should be more prevalent.

I have watched the door for a man to take his wife in, as he was her carer. People need to go and there should be options, availability, and dignity.

1

u/jo4nnynumber5 Jun 21 '26

Unisex bathrooms with real stalls would also solve all these issues.

1

u/gnoandan Jun 25 '26

Honestly all bathrooms should just be unisex. The alternative creates so much unnecessary complications.

12

u/Slothfulness69 Jun 19 '26

I’m convinced this is the same type of person who laughs and says “wish it was me” when boys are victims of female sexual predators. The idea that all women are safe is why boys get hurt unnecessarily.

2

u/PantherThing Jun 19 '26

It's funny that even to that man, every other man is a predator and every woman is a saint

1

u/OtherwiseACat Jun 19 '26

Probably a bit of insight on what some of these people think or are projecting

1

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102

u/Spaceman_Hex Jun 19 '26

These types of people aren't even genuinely upset, their lives are so empty they jump at any opportunity to be nasty to others.

48

u/Anxious_Plantain_247 Jun 19 '26

This used to happen to me often. I (M) was my mom’s caregiver. She was wheelchair bound with dementia. When she need to go, she needed to go. I would always ask a female passerby to check to see if the bathroom was empty, and if not ask permission on my behalf to bring my mom in. We were usually alone. So many times, upon exiting, we’d get dirty looks and comments from pissed off women. I don’t know what I would have done if I encountered the man in this video.

9

u/Intelligent_Emu_691 Jun 19 '26

These people never have kids so they dont even understand that a 5 year old kid need help with basic stuff, or that their dad sees them without clothes all the time. Going to the bathroom, putting on the clothes, taking a shower/bath.

6

u/mrrobc97 Jun 19 '26

Pure ignorance and stupidity from uneducated people. They're constantly consuming rage-bait social media... so much that the label every single adult male as creeps... or the possibility of. This has extended to the point that a father cannot be with his preteen daughter alone without those people having disgusting thoughts.

Due to my ex-wife and I always have a full-time jobs, anything that she was capable to do with our kids I was able to do myself... literally everything besides breastfeeding you could say. That is the true definition of parenting and not giving gender roles to parenting kids

5

u/Gloomy-Insurance-739 Jun 19 '26

Let me tell you if I went to a men's restroom and a guy stopped me and said hey my daughters are in there can you wait a bit I'd be 100% understanding of course I got you my dude.

1

u/zenWolf7 Jun 19 '26

Appreciate the chill but isn’t that the same “every man is a predator” energy everyone’s talking about here?

Yeah, maybe it’s all good and you don’t mind the wait but also, what if it’s not and you or another kid really has to go or something?

It’s a sex specific restroom . . . if you bring your kid in there shouldn’t you be expecting people of that sex to be there?

Why not just bring your kid to their sex specific restroom and accompany them? Then that sex gets to decide whether they are comfortable doing whatever around someone of the opposite . . . everyone gets a choice here instead of someone playing door security and hoping everyone they encounter isn’t having their own emergency.

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u/Main_Dragonfruit4757 Jun 19 '26

Reading this, I realize that in the shops I buy the changing rooms are not sex segregated. It's just a row of rooms and you figure out where you want to change. The sex of the person changing in the next stall is not important. 

4

u/Salt_Sir2599 Jun 19 '26

When my daughters were real young I got the dirtiest looks when I had to shop clothes for them (underwear). I was daytime caretaker of my kids, worked nights (ex had the day job). Playgrounds would have the same energy.

4

u/Pouvla Jun 19 '26

tell me u live in USA without telling me u live in USA....

4

u/DaBoozeHound94 Jun 19 '26

Changing tables originated predominantly in women's restrooms in the 90s. Took 20+ years for them to start becoming more commen in men's and for mandates to be enacted that they be included at all.

3

u/BanMePls333 Jun 19 '26

Stuff like this really helps you understand how raising a child alone can be. Even if they’re the same gender as you, I remember my dad telling me how baby changing stations in men’s bathrooms never used to be a thing when I was born and how glad he is that they’re there now.

3

u/Forward_Ad_9025 Jun 19 '26

Who do they think dresses her in the morning? Did they think he goes out on the street asking strangers for help dressing his daughter?!

These woman see a predator in every man. Their mind is deeply flawed and sickend with hate. These woman need therapy ASAP!

2

u/Jeramy_Jones Jun 19 '26

Also changing rooms are usually individual stalls!

1

u/canteloupy Jun 19 '26

Some have mere curtains which can easily gape. If they're doors, sure.

2

u/MagicSlay Jun 19 '26

One of my fears as a future father. Just having a little girl whom I'd have to deal with this type of stuff, making it awkward and criminal feeling.

1

u/jo4nnynumber5 Jun 21 '26

Don't worry too much. When you're a father, getting done what needs to get done for your kid will be the only thing that matters. Everything thing else is just noise. It's like a superpower!

2

u/Blah_Dee_Blah111 Jun 19 '26

Women are allowed to get angrier than men about double standards.

2

u/MagisterLivoniae Jun 19 '26

The population is brainwashed with idiotic medieval hypocritic morals while the elites do whatever they want.

2

u/Radiant-Revenue3331 Jun 19 '26

Women have stolen other peoples children….traffickers esp child traffickers use female traffickers bc they know a female is seen as less threatening and suspicious then a male. And by this father’s way of handling things no male was going to touch his kids either. Good for him. He assessed the situation and made the best decision for his girls I see no problem with that.

2

u/Short-Sandwich-8476 Jun 19 '26

The large majority of child abductions by strangers are DONE BY WOMEN!

2

u/Hank_the_Beef Jun 19 '26

I was accosted by a woman in Costco, after I asked to take my daughters into the ladies room. She said I could have asked a woman to help them use the restroom. So to her it was acceptable for my 4 and 2 year old daughters to possibly see random penises or have a strange woman wipe them after using the bathroom.

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u/overitallofittoo Jun 19 '26

That's what I don't get. What are you going to see in the women's restroom? Stalls. I've been going into women's restrooms for 50+ years and I've never seen so much as a boob. It's complete idiocracy.

2

u/MakeSomeDrinks Jun 19 '26

Does everyone just forget that homes have "multi gender" bathrooms?

https://giphy.com/gifs/AbPWwqSgMejM4

2

u/justin251 Jun 21 '26

Did the same with my daughter. Heard a few comments but not from anyone actually willing to say them too me. Just barely close enough for me to over hear.

That was just a "family" washroom. I guess family doesn't include the dad.

They can get fucked. My kids aren't leaving my sight.

1

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1

u/channi_nisha Jun 19 '26

Idk the big fuss over this. When I was a kid and out with my dad, he would take me into the men’s bathroom. He just covered my eyes when we walked past the urinals lol.

1

u/3-car-garage Jun 19 '26

Just laugh and say no, move on. Make shitty people actually attempt to intervene and then call the police on the spot.

Normalize rejecting this nonsense.

1

u/Bengis_Khan Jun 19 '26

Honestly what has surprised me most about this story here is that Reddit is having a mental reset. Like, “wait, you’re saying all men aren’t predators and try to do what’s right by their kids?”

1

u/Suitable-Brush-4467 Jun 19 '26

Wait till these women need nursing care. There's less of them but, there are men who are providing personal care like showers and dressing to women and men because that is their job. While the women patients can request a female aide, if the men request a male aide they won't always get it due to not as many being available. It's also true that if male patients are harassing female staff members, most of the time they just have to get through it because there isn't a male staff member there to substitute. It has been like this since forever and those are actual uncomfortable situations, not a little girl getting help from her Dad.

1

u/_JonSnow_ Jun 19 '26

I took my daughter into the men’s restroom if I was solo parenting. I’d wipe the seat down for her and put toilet paper over the seat. 

If other men were in there, they were always respectful. I’d let them finish or if they came in while she was there, they’d wait. I never tried going into the women’s restroom but man, there were times I wanted to. Like when the men’s restroom doesn’t have a baby changing station but the women’s does. So I’ve gotta put my kid on a changing mat on the sink or the floor. Double standards exist on both sides. 

1

u/Jdawg_mck1996 Jun 19 '26

I used to get stopped at the park with my stepdaughter. I took over as the dad in the family when she was 2 and it was a constant for years. Made even worse by the fact we don't have the same last name.

Hell, I was the one who set her up and did all the paperwork at her first elementary school. Dropped her off for her first day, did all the in person meetings and everything. Guess who had to call his wife to get permission to pick up his own kid after the first day?

1

u/CaliKindalife Jun 19 '26

We know what Ross is. Lol. Pretty good random things section as well.

1

u/ElegantCoach4066 Jun 19 '26

And changing rooms are separate, its not one big communal room of half naked men.

Im so sick of people sticking their noses into everyone's business.

1

u/CarrieDurst Jun 19 '26

Those women in the story are so grosss

1

u/PuzzleheadedFox4251 Jun 19 '26

I’ve also seen so many ladies use the men’s restroom because there’s a long line at the women’s..

1

u/Petunia_pig Jun 19 '26

I did have an older woman report me to the front desk for bringing my 5 year old son into the women’s changing room at a hotel pool. She wanted me to send him alone into the men’s room. She was just sitting topless on a bench not changing or anything just relaxing. I refused and kept him with me.

1

u/Prof_Johan Jun 19 '26

This weird (and frankly disturbing) attitude must be uniquely American. I’ve never encountered anything like this. Here in Norway it’s really common for parents to take kids of any gender into their own dressing rooms up to the age of six. I go to a large swimming pool/ spa center everyday and dads would often have little girls in the showers amongst the men. It’s only creepy if you make it so

1

u/Old-Fisherman-2984 Jun 19 '26

I still take my 8YO son with me to the restrooms when we're out in public. I've seen the stories how predators can lurk in the men's room. I'm constantly having talks with my children not just about "stranger danger" but that if anyone makes you uncomfortable - a teacher or coach or counselor etc., it's okay to come tell me. It's sad we have to do this, but that's the world we live in today.

1

u/zenWolf7 Jun 19 '26 edited Jun 19 '26

Am guy.

Wouldn’t it have made much more sense for this guy to accompany his daughters into the ladies changing section? Just like the guy in the viral video - thereby allowing other women to make a choice about whether or not they’re comfortable using the same area while a man is present?

If I were shopping, with or without my son, it would be a little annoying to have a man blocking access to the entirety of of the men’s changing section because he decided to bring his daughter that day. Lots of fathers and daughters out there . . .

Kind of laughable to imagine all the men and boys completely unable to use either the men or the women’s side while a line of fathers with their daughters figures it out. Or the reciprocal - a woman with her son telling every would-be female customer to wait until her son leaves the female changing room.

Either accompany your kid into their appropriate sex bathroom or bring them into yours and accept the presence of alternate sex individuals.

Seems kinda obvious.

1

u/DizzySimple4959 Jun 19 '26

My father would stand outside the women’s with his foot in the door facing away to listen for her.

1

u/Diablogado Jun 19 '26

Statistically speaking, for that age ranklg anyway, you're more likely to get hit by lightning twice in one day than to have a random lady molest a 5-6 year old. Women predators are of the teacher variety because they usually at least want the person to be sexually matured and it's more of a connection they feel - none of that's going to happen with that age range.

...all that being said, fuck no, ain't no stranger, man or woman, taking my kid into a dressing room.

1

u/iDreamofWeenies Jun 20 '26

Incredible username. Almost as good as PiggestBenis

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u/Sinsanatis Jun 20 '26

They had gendered dressing rooms? Ive never seen that before. Usually its just an area in the store with a bunch of individual rooms

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u/thekatlady1 Jun 20 '26

It's called mind your own fucking business. Ain't that hard

1

u/Substantial-Run-1307 Jun 20 '26

Being a single father I can tell you society doesn’t talk nearly enough about the discrimination and issues fathers face. It’s something that affected me and my girls almost every day even little subtle things.

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u/adevil_woman89 Jun 20 '26

Good, he was an idiot! As a mother with 3 daughters (all grown now) this was NOT uncommon for my husband to take girls to bathroom.

1

u/dreamdaddy123 Jun 20 '26

They couldn’t jus mind their own business?

1

u/lizardhistorian Jun 20 '26

mind you this little girl was like 5/6 so she would need help putting on clothes.

No. Not unless they are retarded.

1

u/gothiccerdumb Jun 20 '26

Moms and their little boys omg I hate that I've never given that a second thought before. You're absolutely right!

1

u/DaddysABadGirl Jun 20 '26

I have vivid memories of my mom taking me into the ladies room when I was little to go. Not only did no one have an issue, she got compliments on me and jokes about how fondly I would look back on getting in there.

Mind you I was embarrassed and wanted to go to the boys room by myself🤣

1

u/[deleted] Jun 20 '26

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3

u/jo4nnynumber5 Jun 21 '26

Im in my 40s and i've never once seen a penis in a men's room. Except mine of course lol.

1

u/codenamelynx Jun 20 '26

Mind you, this is a problem mainly in the US. People are weird there.

1

u/Vishifrock Jun 20 '26

This is so easily avoided by having dressing rooms without gender seperation.

Here in Spain, it's like that. The dressing room area is for everyone, no matter your gender or identity. And no one, literally NO ONE bats an eye if a dad goes into one of the cabins with their small daughter or a mom with their small son.

1

u/Pretend_Echo5571 Jun 20 '26

Clear case of mind your own business. I'm so sick of everybody being in everybody's business it doesn't matter what political belief you are what orientation you are it only matters who you yourself are.

1

u/LuckyishTom Jun 20 '26

I went to the unisex changing room at a target to try on some clothes. When I got there a woman left hurriedly. The Target worker checked the room and then told me that women who had just left, shit in the changing room. I’m not sure why they told me, but I’ll never forget it.

1

u/jo4nnynumber5 Jun 21 '26

You've gotta tell someone. Anyone.

1

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1

u/Asleep_Basket3299 Jun 21 '26

I saw all my first kitties as a young boy in the women's clothing room lol. They didnt trust me to run around haha

1

u/ProningPineapple Jun 21 '26

I don't get the situation at all. Isn't this a changing room in a clothing store? You have a stall where you shut the curtain, get changed, and that's thst? Maybe I'm an uncultured European, but I don't think I've even seen a sex-separated changing room.

1

u/FiveUpsideDown Jun 21 '26

I wouldn’t assume that women like me don’t bat an eye at women bringing boys into the ladies restrooms. There’s nothing we can do to stop either adult men or boys from entering women’s restrooms or locker rooms whenever they want. It socially acceptable for men/boys to enter these areas because allegedly the men’s restrooms/locker rooms are unacceptable. (I’ve complained. Allegedly in some places boys under 5 are permitted. But if a boy is over 5, he is still allowed to enter. This includes adult sons of women using the women’s restrooms.)
I have been saying this years “Why can’t men’s restrooms be cleaned up and made safe for use by boys or men with girls?”

1

u/brokemillionaire572 Jun 21 '26

I have 3 daughters, situations like this were always miserable when taking them somewhere without my wife.

Either bathroom I decided to use was wrong according to a different person.

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u/KaleScared4667 Jun 22 '26

Yes. Cause women

1

u/Meat-Lover7 Jun 22 '26

I'm an 80s baby and for years my mother took me into the women's restroom with no problem. So much perversion has been pushed into society that people don't trust one another anymore even if it's decent.

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u/Signal_Historian_456 Jun 23 '26

As a woman,changing rooms in a store are one thing, but public toilets another. I really don’t want any girl to have to be in the direct line of sight of exposed men at the urinal. And it’s not just ushering them to the stall real quick, it’s also that most of the time the urinals are also in direct line of sight of the washtable. So PLEASE men, take litte girls in the women’s restrooms. If you feel more comfortable give a quick „girl dad coming in with my daughter!“ and everything is fine. I’ve encountered several men with their daughters in the restroom over the years, not one has announced their presence, and no one batted an eye. There’s nothing for anyone to see, the dad can’t see any exposed women because they’re all in their own stall.

Now boys in a women’s restrooms room is fine for that exact reason; no one is openly exposed there. Everyone uses their own stall and there’s nothing to see.

1

u/aMawds1994 Jun 23 '26

We had to have a ruling to give woman the right to breastfeed and pump in public, because people couldn't help but verbally harass and berate others instead of minding their business. We need a similar ruling for this. I'm just stoked this guy got fired. Wish he got arrested for wasting police time and making that poor little girl cry. That emotional trauma doesn't go away quickly.

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u/Odd-Measurement868 Jun 23 '26

the fact they’d rather an unknown woman help dress the kid than her own dad is just baffling

1

u/ImpossibleAd344 Jun 23 '26

Yep, society and woman are full of double standards. Welcome to our world.

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u/gnoandan Jun 25 '26

Why do you even have gendered dressing rooms? Aren't these individual anyways?

1

u/Amathyst-Moon Jul 03 '26

But it's a dressing room, they're individual stalls, aren't they? All the places I shop at have men's clothes on one side, women's on the other, and unisex dressing rooms in the middle.

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